“No,” I shake my head even though she can’t see me. “I was waiting on you.”
“Oh,” she sets the menu down. “I’m really sorry. You should have ordered.”
“It would have been awkward.” That’s the most honest answer I have for her. I would have been sitting here, watching her eat, with nothing to fill the space.
“I can understand that.”
“What made you decide to meet me?” The fact she is late hangs out there in the open.
She looks down at the menu this time, gathering her thoughts. “Closure? The kiss? Both? It’s really hard to pinpoint exactly why I’m here. My feelings for you have never changed. But I can’t be with you on the sly. I won’t be treated like a dirty secret.”
“I’ve never treated you that way.”
“No, but you didn’t want to tell the one person we should have. And that is what makes it feel gross. Delilah has a right to know, especially when she implied that we couldn’t date each other.”
“You realize we are grown, right? She can’t exactly tell us who we are allowed to date.”
“Yes, I know.” She huffs in frustration. “It’s a respect thing. I don’t have siblings. Hell, I barely have a family. Excuse me for not wanting to fuck up the one good relationship I’ve had in my life.”
Her voice has risen, and it’s getting the attention of the other patrons. I place a hand on hers. “It’s okay. We don’t have to get into that right now.”
The waitress comes back with my coffee and we place our breakfast order. It’s the perfect distraction to break the tension coming from Lisa.
Once the waitress is gone, Lisa focuses on me once again. “We kind of do. That’s the whole reason I left all those months ago. You wouldn’t listen to me then, but I need you to now.”
“Okay.”
Taking a deep breath, she speaks. “Delilah is probably the best person I know. She took me in when I first came to town. Her opinion of me means more than anything. Then I met you and got swept up in a relationship. And it felt shitty keeping that from the most important person in my life. And when you doubled down on not telling her, that made things even worse. I couldn’t in good conscience stay here, so I left. It was easier than telling her about us.”
“I’m sorry about that.” Running a hand through my hair, I exhale. “I was scared. Not only of how my sister would react, but also because I didn’t know how things with us were going to pan out. I lo- liked you a lot.” She doesn’t need to know I’m in love with her. Not if we can’t figure out a way to make this work. “I still do, but I haven’t had the best track record with girlfriends. The last thing I wanted was to have Delilah feel like she’d be in the middle.”
“Have you talked to her?”
Woah, that question is out of left field. “No. Cash and Trey were at the house when she came by, and I didn’t feel having an audience around would be good.”
The waitress shows up with our food and we dig in. I’m starving but the break in conversation is nice. I’m not sure where to go from here. Lisa must feel the same way because she hasn’t said anything else. It’s weird eating without any small talk. To be sitting here with so much I want to say and being left alone with my thoughts.
Once we’re finished eating, Lisa digs through her bag for something. She pulls her wallet out and I wave it away. “Breakfast is on me.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah.”
She puts it back in her bag and leans back against the seat. “I know it’s hard with me being back, but please talk to your sister. Maybe that will shed some light on why I’m so adamant on her knowing about us.”
“After I talk to her, will you at least consider giving us another shot?”
“Yes,” she closes her bag and stands up. “But you have to find out her general feelings about us dating. I can’t go behind her back again.”
“I will.” I stand. “Can I at least give you a hug?”
She nods and I wrap my arms around her, squeezing her tight. Who knows, it might be the last time we hug each other. Releasing her, I watch her walk out of the restaurant. Once she’s in her car, I call my sister.
9
Lisa
That was a bad idea.I shouldn’t have gone. At least he knows how I feel and my reasoning. Guilt also flows through me because I was so late. I figured he would have gotten tired of waiting and left before I showed up. Then I wouldn’t be feeling mixed up about my emotions.
