Yes, Joaquin. Why did one of your entourage attack me?
‘It was a prank, gone horribly wrong.’ Joaquin’s voice is strained. ‘As soon as I heard about it, I came here. But not quickly enough for my darling.’
A prank? His voice fades as my father takes me into the hallway. What’s left of another of Joaquin’s minions is there, a broken twisted thing, more blood soaking into the deep carpets. Bertrand sits on the floor, his back to the wall, two guards helping him. There’s a cut on his head, his nose a purple bruise. When he sees me his whole expression crumples.
‘I’m all right,’ I say, my voice a whistle of breath. My neck hurts where I was grabbed, my shoulders aching from being slammed into the wall. But I need to let him know it wasn’t his fault. It was no prank, either. If I hadn’t been able to defend myself, I’d be dead.
‘I did it,’ I say to my father, my voice still a wheeze.
‘What did you do?’ His arm is strong around me, holding me up.
‘The M-Morningstar. Moves eight and thirteen.’ I think of Michael, his hands covering mine, his chest against my back, his heat and scent all around me. I’m suddenly desperate to see him. It must be the shock.
‘Varin has taught you well.’ My father’s voice catches, and I feel his kiss on my hair. ‘But now we must get you cleaned up, before your mother returns and sees you like this.’
Oh God. My mother. I’m not sure what she would have done if she’d been here. I shudder, and my father quickens his pace, lifting me. My skirt is unpleasantly heavy against my legs, and all I can smell is violets. Darkness, is my room truly this far away?
‘Will Bertrand be all right?’
‘He will. His pride bruised, perhaps, more than anything.’
‘Guards on me doubled, I guess. Or tripled. Maybe he’ll just wrap me in cotton wool or make me move into the fortified rooms.’ It helps to joke about things. But I’m shaking like a leaf, and know that when I close my eyes, I’ll see blood and darkness.
My father comes into my room with me, taking a seat on the long chaise. ‘I’ll wait while you clean yourself up.’
I nod, heading into my bathroom, my hands trembling so much I can barely undo my dress. I step into the shower still clothed, not wanting to get any more blood on the grey tiles. I step out of my dress, stripping off my underwear as I gradually warm up. I remember another bathroom, another moment of violence, rusty stains disappearing in a swirl down the drain.
Blood. It shapes my entire existence. Who has it, what type they have, whether or not it holds magic. It decides whether we’re food or nobility. Whether we’re strong, or weak. Yet it’s something we all have in common.
I lean against the wall, once again feeling as though something is eluding me, some key that will help me make this work, help me create a world where vampires and humans can live side by side, safely.
I soap my skin, let heat take the ache from my shoulders, calm the tremors in my limbs. But it can’t touch the sorrow in my heart. Running separate courts, day and night, won’t return things to how they used to be. We cannot go back. We need to go forward. If only I can figure out how.
ChapterThirty-Five
HEARTS ON FIRE
Tonight is the ball to mark my eighteenth birthday. Another step on my journey towards the Raven throne. I try not to think about the last ball here. My father, broken and burnt. Kyle and I in my room. Death and destruction and lust, all tangled into one terrible evening.
Tonight will be different. Instead of hiding away, I’ll be the focus. The hunter, instead of the hunted.
Michael, as my lieutenant, escorts me to the ballroom. There are also several guards following us, on Bertrand’s orders. He’s recovered from his injuries, as have I, the faint bruises remaining on my throat covered by my Raven choker.
Michael’s arm brushes mine as we walk down the long hallway. My bare skin tingles at the contact. He glances over, like he knows the effect he’s having on me. I try to ignore how good he looks in the tailored navy suit, so dark it’s almost black, his pushed-back golden hair brushing the high collar, his shoulders broad beneath the fine fabric.
I’ve wanted you since the first time I saw you.
I can no longer deny I feel the same way. I’m stuck between two impossible choices. A fierce vampire mate, uniting two realms, making Raven strong. Or the choice of my heart. I know what I need to do. I just wish it wasn’t so difficult.
We haven’t had the chance to talk since the events in the War Room. At least, not in the way he wants. He was furious, of course, when he heard about the attack on me. We’ve also had to manage the situation with the Channel Islands, as well as prepare for the ball. But I’ve been careful not to be alone with him, even though every part of me wants to fall into his arms.
‘You look nice,’ he says. A faint smirk, but there’s a gleam of appreciation in his eyes. ‘Apart from that necklace.’
Joaquin wanted to escort me to the ball, of course. If it were any other party, I probably would have let him. But this one signifies my imminent ascent to the Raven throne. Lion are here, as well as Jaguar. And Scorpion’s ships were spotted last night, just outside our waters. I want to show up as a ruler, not someone’s date.
Still, it hasn’t stopped him from staking his claim. I found a jade pendant on my pillow when I emerged from my shower, with a note.
Wear this for me, lovely one.
