I fuelled myself with breakfast this morning, and I made sure to drink some water so there’s no risk of dehydration. And this morning when I put on my super suit, instead of finding things to criticize, I looked at my leg muscles. How strong they are, and how the iridescent lines of my costume highlight them. I whispered to them to not do me dirty with today’s stunt and gave them a quick pat before heading to Warehouse B.
Today needs to go well. We can’t afford to have any more delays, and I need to prove to everyone—and myself—that I’m capable of this.
When Tanya shouts “run it”, Roman bursts ahead of me and leaps across the space between the rooftop set pieces. He lands in a somersault that makes the whole stunt look easy. It’s not, but I know I can do it too.
I take off for the edge, knowing that six strides puts my right foot at the perfect spot for jumping. When I hit it, I hurl my body through the air. Time slows to a crawl as I leap, but my eyes fix on my target: Roman’s arm. The compass isn’t visible today under the cover-up the makeup team applied to it, but I imagine it guiding me exactly where I need to go.
When I finish soaring through the air, I grab onto Roman’s forearm, and his large hand wraps around mine. It’s so secure I know without a shadow of a doubt he will not let me fall. He pulls me up with such ease it’s practically offensive.
Roman beams at me. “Way to go, Sparky.” The crew breaks into a cheer.
Also clapping on the ground—with pure glee all over theirfeatures—are Jesse, and his father, who are finally getting the set visit Roman promised them.
“Incredible work, you two!” Arnold shouts to Roman and me. When I glance down at Tanya, she’s giving us two thumbs up, and somehow that feels like the strongest endorsement of all.
“Let’s reset and film it!”
Chapter Fifty-Seven
CLOVER
The weeks have been blurring together. Waking up before the sun does, heading to set and filming well into the night, then collapsing into a tangle of limbs with Roman. We’ve got one more day of filming out here at the studio before we head to New York City to capture exterior shots.
It feels surreal to be almost done shooting my first major film. The stunts have all gone off without a hitch after we nailed the rooftop one, and it’s felt amazing to know my body is strong and capable. Ensuring I’m eating properly has helped give me the energy I need to make it through filming all of them.
This morning I grab a coffee from the craft table before we film. I smile when I look down at it. Who knew that adding a splash of milk and a little sugar could be an act of defiance? A small and sweet ‘fuck you’ to anyone who ever told me I had to shrink myself.
The more I reflect, the more I’m coming to realize that it’s never been about my size, it’s about how I’ve been made to feel about my body.
I’ve been feeling better with these small changes, and Iknow it’ll only improve when I start seeing the therapist I booked an appointment with a few weeks from now–because fuck Anita, I booked one.
When I look up, Roman’s studying me from across the room. He inclines his head, a silent way to ask if everything is alright. I nod. I’m starting to be. I will be.
We aren’t in our super-suits for today’s scene, just regular civilian clothes, but damn does he fill out any outfit perfectly. I stare at his broad chest and bite down on a smile when I remember I woke up pressed against it this morning, listening to the calming, steady beat of his heart. It’s dorky as hell, but I don’t think I’ve ever been happier. The few times I haven’t woken up on his chest, it’s been because he’s sitting at the piano, scribbling down notes on some paper and miming hand positions overtop the keys so he doesn’t make enough noise to wake me.
Whenever I haven’t been tangled up in Roman, Jill and I are usually spending what limited time we have together. The younger Everett siblings have unofficially taken me in, and it feels like home.
I feel like a kid in a candy store when I look around the glimmering lobby of the hotel. It’s one of New York City’s finest, and the studio is paying for it. I have a feeling I might pass out if I were to see the number of zeros on the bill. When I glance over at Roman, it’s clear he’s been watching me, with a small smirk on his lips.
We were set to arrive later tonight, but when Roman found out I’d never been to the city before, he bumped our flights earlier. Heading up to our suite, I look around the opulent space to find two bedrooms. It’s dumb, but my heart sinks a little. Did he book the second bedroom because hewants a little space? As I stand in the doorway of the bedroom, Roman comes up behind me.
“Which one should be ours?” The last word makes me feel as though I’m floating on a warm and fuzzy cloud.
“Ours?”
“Come on, Daly. Co-stars don’t let co-stars sleep alone.” I can hear the amusement in his voice as he bends down to press a kiss into the crook of my neck. Leaning into his touch, I lift my hand to reach back and muss his hair.
“They don’t, huh?”
“Not when they feel like this about one another,” he says on a more serious note.What does ‘this’ mean?I want to shout. Before I have time to pry, he pulls away.
“You ready to go?”
I spin to face him. “Go where?”
“You’ll see.”
My feet hurt from all the walking we’ve done, and my face is getting sore from the grin that’s been plastered to it all afternoon. We spent a few hours walking around Central Park, stopping by the exterior of whereFriendstakes place, and then we visited the Metropolitan. As we walk back toward the hotel, a chill threads itself through the air, causing me to shiver.
