“Good luck to you, then,” he said. “I am not an easy man to catch.”
“I’m a little sharper than Bracebridge or the king,” I said. “Better at my job.”
He raised a black brow.
“But I haven’t made the offer yet,” I said. “So don’t get ahead of yourself. A ship can only go as fast as waves can carry her.”
I turned to leave but paused at the door.
“Dream sweet,” I said over my shoulder.
“When the moons meet,” I heard him say as I closed the door behind me.
I sagged against it, eyes wide, heart rushing up to my throat and down to my boots and back again. Suns, moons, Forge fog a faun. I was bold, yes, and I was reckless, but I really wanted something with this man. Would rune lead to ruin, or was there a chance at all we could soar over these stormy seas? I took a deep breath. I needed to clear my head.
If I was to chase a winter hawk, I’d need to be able to catch one. I’d have to be swift, and I’d have to be sure.
Be strong and be swift, said theTouchstone, and I grinned.
I’d have to have wings.
I raced to my corner of the galley, lit a candle, and cracked open the journal.
Fly or Swim? Tooth or Wing?went the first line.Who are you in your bones?
I settled onto the floor and began to read.
33. Hollow
I can’t explain the sensations as your bones lengthen and crack, as your hands shrivel and twist, as the hairs on your arms become feathers. The pain of the change was worse than any chimeric, and this was only one arm. I didn’t know what to expect once I began to shrink, as my bones began to hollow, or as my organs began to split, join, and change. Thanavar said that was weeks away, but still, I can’t say how long I lay on my bunk, staring at what used to be my arm and the dark, iridescent plumage that had replaced it.
I had chosen to be a swift, like Worley’s birds. I don’t know why. There was something about the small, dark, fast creatures that appealed to me. They could fly forever, even sleep in the skies, and only made land to clutch. I could lose myself to that mirror. Happily.
Maybe I’d fly with a hawk.
During those days, I took care of Worley’s birds, sketched almost every member of this remarkable crew, and cherished the bits of my remaining skin untouched by rune and scar.
Thanavar taught me every night, and I found myself hungry for his company. We were runechasers both, desperate to share the magik that gave us life.
I hadn’t made the offer yet, even though thoughts of him were wylde in my dreams, and I knew I was heading into dangerous waters. I wanted so much more from him now, not just chimeric and teaching, but his hands and his mouth and his body. But my mother was wrong. Bedding your captain was a foolish plan, and I risked losing it all if I made the offer.
He was such a man of plans and pattern, of mystery and secrets, and I couldn’t even be certain he’d accept. And if he did, would he hate himself afterward? Would he hate me? We werestill on theTouchstone, the ship he loved and who loved him back. They were notorious. They were legend. How could I ever hope to compete?
I am not an easy man to catch.
Forge, what was I thinking?
I was so engrossed in my thoughts that I barely heard the pips. As the wing shrank back to skin and bone and runescars, I listened hard for bell or drum. We had been running all day now, still in the Silence but clipping because of the Dreadcurrent. At this point, on both sides of the equatorus, the oceans raced toward the Dreadwall, creating wind and knots aplenty.
The pips sounded again, so I tucked the journal away next to the little wooden doll and swung out of my bunk.
“Rations at Dog Four,” said Nanarobbin as I passed.
“Wouldn’t miss it for all the jewels in Braithe, Nan,” I said.
He bent back to chopping, but I’m certain he smiled.
The sky was a sickly green as night began to fall, rushing like hurricane clouds and streaking above us in a heavy haze. Off the forecastle, there was a white line on the horizon, and I swallowed the tightening of my throat. This was it.
