“I’m not, and she knows it. She’s better than you give her credit for.”
Oh fog, it was beginning to make sense.
“Let it go, Gav. Lethergo, and by all that is holy, let yourself go as well.”
“The Dreadwall—”
“Will fall with or without you. Let. It. Go.”
And it hit me like a swinging boom.
TheTouchstonewas Kirianae, the RuneTree, GoddessLindurithain.Not just made from her timber buther. No wonder she was dying. No wonder Thanavar risked our lives to scavenge her planks. She was the key to repairing the Dreadwall, to restoring the balance to magik itself. This wasn’t about just getting to the Cloudgate with the ironmages. This was about taking theTouchstone home.
“It’s not fair to Blue,” said Fahr.
“I know,” said the captain. “I will not ask.”
My mind was reeling. I didn’t dare breathe.
“But you’re going to have to,” said Fahr. “You can’t do this on your own.”
“You know I can,” said Thanavar. “Besides, if the Court proves worthy, they may be more help than we think. And if they do not—”
“—then thousands die.”
“Thousands will die regardless, if I fail.”
“You always do this. Always devise plans so that there is no other way but yours.”
“I did not begin this, Dev.”
“Oh, but you will end it. Suns, don’t I know. You’ve told me that for years.”
“Dev—”
“You shouldn’t have brought me back!”
There was a long pause.
“I am not sorry,kel’yion.”
“It was Shroud magik, Gav. You of all people should know not to play with that. Now, I’m marked. Who knows when the debt comes due?”
And there was silence for a very long time.
“You should have let me go. Why can’t you let things go?”
It had to be hard to be someone’skel’yion. Someone you’d die for, but harder still, someone for whom you’d live. But what of the reverse? What manner of love would it take to let someone go?
“You’re convinced she can slew the Dread?” said Fahr.
“Rhi’Ahrships have before, and theTouchstoneis far superior to any of them.”
“Just don’t kill us all, please. You just brought me back. Let me live a day or two, please?”
“Devanhan…”
I could hear boots, and I ducked into the shadow of the companionway, praying he didn’t swing a candle or lantern as he went.
