“What are you doing here?” His voice was low and throaty, as if he wasn’t getting enough air into his lungs.
“I-I’m sorry. I just wanted…” I trailed off, looking at him more closely. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.” He turned his back and ignored me. He took a deep breath in, and out came a frail, wheezing sound.
“Hey, if you’re sick, you should let someone know.”
“I’m not sick.” He didn’t turn around.
I hesitated. I understood not wanting to show weakness, but I didn’t want Jayce to think he had to hide himself away if he wasn’t feeling well.
“Want me to get someone?”
“No!” He shouted, eyes wide and scared, surprising me with his intensity. He lowered his head and heaved a sigh. “No, don’t get anyone. I’ll be okay in a minute.”
I didn’t want to leave him like that. I contemplated for a moment, then took the few steps down and sat next to him.
“If something’s wrong, you can tell me.” I echoed the same words he’d said to me.
He tilted his head back and glanced at me quickly before looking away. His fists were clenched, white-knuckled and trembling.
“Non-disclosure agreement, remember? I can’t tell anybody anything, or else they’ll sue me into the poorhouse.” I tried to give him an encouraging smile. I got a hesitant look back in response. “You don’t have to, though. No pressure.”
We sat in silence for a few long moments. I kept on expecting him to get up and leave, but he stayed sitting next to me, the tension in his muscles slowly relaxing with every second.
I bumped my shoulder against his. “You know, the guys might get worried if the two of us disappear together for too long.”
Jayce huffed out a small chuckle and, slowly, the shaking in his hands stopped.
“This stays off the record, right?”
“I promise.”
“Okay. Right.” He rubbed his hands on his pants as if wiping away sweaty palms. I wondered for a moment if he was going to continue. Then he spoke.
“I get panic attacks.”
