Ignore those pricks. You’re amazing, Ailey. I don’t know what kind of job you’re doing, but I know you’ll be awesome at it. Don’t let those jerks get you down.
Thanks, Neil. I’ll try.
If you ever need a boost of self-esteem, just let me know, and I’ll sing your praises.
I don’t think you need to go that far.
But it’s true. I think you’re an amazing girl. They’re lucky to have you.
My insides floodedwith warmth at Neil’s words. He always knew what to say to cheer me up. He was such a great guy.
Anyone would belucky to have you.
I flushedand didn’t know how to respond. I’d been wondering if Neil felt as strongly about me as I did about him.
I guess I’d find out when summer was over.
***
TRAVELINGCROSS-COUNTRY by bus wasn’t an ideal way to spend the summer, but I had one small consolation—we wouldn’t have to sleep in one. Deena told me we’d be staying in hotel rooms, only sleeping in the bus if we were behind schedule or in a hurry to get somewhere. That was a relief. My mild car sickness would have made sleeping on a bus every night an unappealing prospect.
“I thought all the band members and crew slept on their tour buses,” I asked Deena.
“Kell refused. Said sleeping on a bus was trashy.” She threw her hands up. “That boy is going to be the death of me.”
When Deena guided me to my assigned bus to drop off my suitcase, I was surprised to see an interior just like a normal living room, with wide leather sofas and squishy cushions, a table and chairs for dining, and a fridge, stove, and sink. I’d half expected to be assigned some sort of bus with bucket seats that maybe reclined back to lay down.
It also had a full-sized bar, complete with two barstools that also had cushioned seats. There was one big screen TV, but also multiple little screens, so each person could watch their own movie. There was a ceiling fan, floor lamps, carpets, and drapery on the windows. It was, in essence, a full living room you could find in any home.
The setup was pretty swanky for an intern.
A sudden thought occurred to me. Butterflies took wing in my stomach.
“Deena… I’m not sharing with the band, am I?”
“Of course. How else will you be able to chronicle their every move?”
I tried to keep the butterflies from spewing out of my mouth. Not only was I following the band around, I was going to be in the exact same bus as them. Alone, with Jayce, for weeks at a time.
I wished to god I hadn’t packed my fuzzy pajamas printed with bunnies and baby ducks. Hopefully Deena was right and we’d rarely have to sleep on the bus overnight.
To distract myself from my nervous stomach, I started snapping pictures of the interior. That was the kind of thing fans would like to see, eventually. I couldn’t post the pictures yet, but once the word was out that Feral Silence was on tour, everyone would want to know how the band was traveling. The more luxurious, the more successful our fans would think we were.
We wouldn’t want them to think we were spending too much money, though. We needed our fans to believe we still needed their support, that we hadn’t yet made it to the big leagues. There were always fans who gave up on their favorite groups when they got too popular, and we didn’t want that to happen yet. We still had a long way to go.
I snorted inwardly at myself. I was already thinking in terms of “our” and “we” as if I was part of the band. I couldn’t help it. If I was going to be the voice of the band, I had to think of myself as one of them. It would make their connection to their fans that much stronger.
Since I was the first person on the band’s tour bus, I had all the time in the world to explore, but aside from taking photos to post online, I was too nervous. It was too much like ransacking a stranger’s house.
Instead, I sat on a hard chair at the small dining table near the back, playing with both my phones, flipping them over and over in my hands, one in each. My crossed legs jiggled nervously, waiting for everyone else to arrive. Would they be annoyed at having to share their space with me? Four people on one bus had to be cramped enough. Add one more and it might make the place claustrophobic.
I was in the middle of a silent contest between my right hand and left hand, seeing how fast I could flip my phones, when a notification popped up. I had set up two types of alerts. One was for general notifications, whenever anyone online happened to mention the band in passing. The other was for direct alerts, letting me know when someone was sending a message directly to the band. It was the same setup I had with my own personal accounts.
I only had the alerts set up for a few hours before I realized I could ignore most of them. There was a lot of squealing fangirl praise that didn’t need a response.
I had thought out a few good strategies based on what I did for my AudioAiley persona. Every so often I would pick one of Feral Silence’s fans at random and write back. They would no doubt freak out when that happened, unable to believe their idols were speaking with them directly. That would cause a flurry of posts from other fans hoping for the same thing. On my own accounts, I always waited a few days before reaching out again, waiting until the furor died down before igniting the flames again.
I figured that same strategy would work with the band, only a thousand times more so. After all, Feral Silence was a rock band with hordes of fans. I was just another music reviewer, albeit one with a bit more of a following than most.
