Epilogue
The spotlights hit my eyes, blinding me. The roar of the crowd filled my ears. The thunder of bass and drums assaulted my chest.
This was our last concert for the tour. One more song and we'd be done.
I didn't know whether to feel sadness or relief. This tour had taken a lot out of the band. Every one of us was run down, exhausted. But every time we stepped foot on stage, we were renewed. There was nothing like performing in front of a cheering audience of adoring fans.
But it had been a long month or more. Our bodies could only take so much. I knew the guys were ready for a break. So was I.
I just had to do one more thing.
"You guys having an awesome time?" I shouted into the microphone. I was rewarded with a a howling chorus offuck yeah. "We're going to end this one a little different tonight."
I nodded to a waiting guitar tech who took that as his cue. We swapped guitars, electric for acoustic. I took a seat on a small stool. The other guys filed off stage, leaving me alone under a single spotlight.
"This is a new song," I told the audience. "It means a lot to me." My voice only wavered slightly. I cleared my throat. "I hope you enjoy it."
I put my fingers to the strings.
I hadn't planned on playing the song Morris and I had written in public. I didn't think I'd ever want anyone else to hear it. It was too personal. Too painful.
But the moment we sat back and took in the final, completed version, I knew. This song needed to be performed. It needed to be heard.
I needed to play it for Liam.
I needed to play it for Morris.
I needed to play it for Harper.
Most importantly, I needed to play it for myself.
The burning need inside me had nothing to do with the actual song itself. The music was heart wrenching, yes. Touching, sorrowful, uplifting. The song said a million things, and yet in the end, it really only had one meaning.
I was strong.
I was strong enough to face the past without falling apart.
I was strong enough to stare into the darkness and survive.
The others had been right. Closing myself off, running from my demons, was a terrible way to cope.
But I wasn't weak.
I was strong.
As I sang, my eyes wandered over to Liam, watching from behind the curtains. His eyes shone with pride. Even after everything, he still looked at me with wonder. Still looked at me as if I were extraordinary. He looked at me like I hung the moon.
Or as if I were an exploding star, burning in the night sky.
And that was when I realized it.
Up there on that stage, I knew I could take on the world. And it wasn't because I was strong, or because I'd stopped being weak. It was nothing so simple as that.
It was because I was…
Me.
After all these years, I'd found myself again.
