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"That you'd still be upset with me. I just wanted to make sure you'd be okay."
"I told you, I understand."
"I promise I won't freak out again."
"Thank you."
But even as I accepted his words, I knew they were probably a lie. Eventually, something was going to happen. I was going to want to do something, or something would happen to me, and there was no telling whether or not he'd react the same as last time.
After all, the tiniest of things had set him off. What if something real actually went wrong? What if there was a serious risk to my health one day? Would he be able to handle it? Or would he freak out again?
I'd thought Nathan would be able to deal with the realities of my illness.
Maybe I had been wrong.
