Tommy punched him in the arm. “Don’t say crap like that. First we don’t slut shame, second, I think you have to have more than one lover in your life to be considered a slut, third, just be you, okay?” He took the tray and dragged Ru into the bedroom to begin the intensive process of choosing a wardrobe for the evening.
Two hours, five clothing changes, and a bunch of makeup later, Ru was on point for a solo performance benefiting LGBT youth. He sang a couple of covers and did a few songs that Vocal Growth was known for in more of a rock style than the pop format most people were used to. Oddly enough, the show sold out—almost four thousand in attendance.
And though he hadn’t done much practicing in the past few weeks, Ru felt he sounded pretty good and was thrilled to not have to dance.
The pictures he took with people all seemed legit, some shaking his hand or wanting autographs. No one mentioned his fall from grace. One young man hugged him, muttering, “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
Ru patted his back and whispered comforting things to him, just believing the kid to be some overzealous fan.
“You coming out changed everything for me,” the kid sobbed. Instantly Ru felt uncomfortable, but the kid wasn’t letting go. “When my folks kicked me out, I spent so much time on the streets. Was selling myself just to eat. Didn’t want to go to a shelter because they make you go to school, and at school people just bully you and beat you up. But it got so bad I just wanted to die. And then there you were. On the front page of every magazine. Ryunoski Nakimura, heartthrob to the whole world, child prodigy, and homosexual. All I could think of was, well, if he could do it, if he could make it, even when the whole world is saying bad things, I can’t give up, you know? God made this beautiful, talented man, and made him gay too. He has to have a plan for me.”
Ru sucked in a deep breath, not knowing what to say.
“Now I’m in a shelter for LGBT youth. They got me the ticket for this, and I’m in school. Gonna graduate no matter what. Going to help kids like us. Maybe become a psychologist or something. And it’s all because of you.”
“Thank you for telling me,” Ru said, overwhelmed by the boy’s gratitude. “But you have to do these things for yourself.”
“Oh, I am! And screw that Kris Turlington guy. He’s an ass and didn’t deserve you anyway. I can’t wait for your solo album. I bet you’re going to blow Vocal Growth out of the water. Those guys are nothing without you.”
Ru was again at a loss for words. He felt his phone vibrate, text received. He ignored it, thinking it was probably just Kris bugging him again. The kid called over some of his friends, who had their own stories to tell him about how he’d been an inspiration to them, still was an inspiration to them. For the first time in six months, Ru felt like maybe things were going to be okay. He even met a couple of the organizers for the shelter, thanking them for bringing the kids. They in turn thanked him for being open and friendly. Ru made a note to himself to see if he could donate money to the shelter.
Over the next couple of days, Ru flew around the country doing exactly the same thing: performing for LGBT youth and trying to raise awareness and funds to help the kids. At every event there was a line of kids wanting to tell him their stories. Ru wrote two songs in the midst of all that madness, on the plane or in the dressing room, stuff about not giving up and pain not being enough for him to let go of it all. Tommy accompanied him to almost all the shows, though by now he had AJ on his ass screaming at him to come back to San Diego so they could finish choosing the guy who would replace Ru.
“You should just go,” Ru told Tommy. “He’s only going to get angrier the longer he waits.”
“He’s going to pick a replacement with or without me there. Just as they all agreed to kick you out without asking my opinion. And so you know, Dane had no part in that either. That was AJ and the record label. And between you and me, I’m pretty sure it was just because AJ felt you were getting more attention than he was.” Tommy crossed his arms over his chest. Unfortunately, Tommy didn’t have the options Ru had. Though he could dance, and his voice was okay, he was not one of the more popular guys of the group and really didn’t do well with songwriting. His voice wasn’t strong enough to stand on its own, even with a really good songwriter providing music. AJ and Ru had always been the two guys most in the spotlight because of their talent, their looks, and their outgoing personalities. Though Ru was pretty sure that AJ was 90 percent fake.
In the car on the way back to the condo, Ru was so tired he was dozing, but Tommy was talking. It was pretty late. “I think Katie should book more of those for you. Seems to be a pretty charged crowd. I haven’t seen you that connected to your fans in ages.”
“Those kids could have been me,” Ru told him. “If I wasn’t famous. If I had never joined Vocal Growth. You know my dad wanted nothing to do with me when he found out. Mom thinks I’m some sort of devil, and I would be worthless to her if it weren’t for the money. After Kris... Well, I guess I sort of started to believe it too.”
“But you’re not. You’re just you. Ru, the kid with the really amazing voice and this crazy talent for songwriting that can reach the entire world. You just need to get back on your feet. I think the new album is just what you need. Your performances have been great. You were a little rusty in the first show. Don’t think I didn’t notice you were flat through the first half of ‘Fly Home.’ But you’ve still got it. Coming out to the world hasn’t changed any of that. Sure, not everyone is going to love you, but how is that different from before?”
Ru shrugged, feeling tears well up, dammit. “I’m just so lonely.”
“Find someone. You’re a good-looking guy with a lot to offer. Ask someone out.”
“And how do I trust anyone again?”
Tommy sighed. “I really wish you’d let me kick Kris’ ass.”
“Would be really bad media for you.”
“But so worth it.”
Ru laughed lightly. He pulled his cell out of his pocket to check for a new text. He remembered it buzzing earlier, thinking it was probably a text from the bastard he’d once called boyfriend. He’d been getting texts pretty regularly and ignoring them all. But when the text came up, it was from an unknown number.
Hey, this is Adam, the guy from the library. So you’re a Madonna fan?
OMG!
“What? What is it? What did that bastard do now?” Tommy demanded.
“Not Kris. Adam. The text is from Adam.” The time stamp read that he’d actually sent the text a few hours ago. Obviously Ru had been out of range at some point.
“Who’s Adam?”
“The guy from the library.” Some of the lingering depression began to drop off Ru’s shoulders. “He’s asking if I’m a Madonna fan.”
