Chapter Nineteen
The utter loneliness of the condo smashed into Ru like a two-ton bag of depression falling from the ceiling and hitting him dead center in the soul. Adam had been quiet, wound up tight with tension, still, and holding back the hurt. Ru feared he’d fall apart, but he didn’t know how to fix it.
He should have told Adam sooner. He knew that. He’d just been too afraid. Now he’d made a fool of himself and forced Adam to out himself to the most popular guy in school. How much of this was going to backlash on Adam?
Ru sunk down onto the couch and yanked at his hair. He was as bad as Kris. A duplicate of his ex-boyfriend’s betrayal, only it was he who had done it to Adam. Lying, hiding, and finally flipping out. What had even happened? He had never hit anyone before.
But Nate had kept pushing closer, invading Adam’s space, brushing against Adam when they were working out. Ru knew Adam didn’t notice. Adam was oblivious to a lot of the smaller stuff because of the endless noise in his own head. Adam never noticed when someone smiled at him or let a caress linger too long. He was an eager lover, but an inexperienced one who didn’t know how to ward off a forceful guy like Nate.
And everything about Nate screamed danger, too close, demanding.
Ru picked up his guitar and began to strum. He paused long enough to turn on a digital recorder as he ran through angry chords and a mash of hurt-dripping words. He was just venting, needing to get out all the swirls of fear and pain in his head. The door opened, and Tommy walked in looking tired, but Ru didn’t stop. He let out all his frustrations and hoped he would have something he could salvage from it later when his head was calm enough to think.
Tommy disappeared into his room, only to return and perch on the edge of the sofa a minute later. When Ru finally ran out of steam, they both let silence stretch through the room for a few minutes.
“Gonna call that one ‘A Sailor’s Tale’? I don’t think I’ve ever heard you swear so much,” Tommy asked.
Ru sighed. He had the odd urge to smash something. Too bad he didn’t have Nate’s face still within reach. His fist hurt from the punch, and he’d been shocked it had happened, like a reflex. It was probably all over the news already.
Former Boy Band Star Attacks High School Student.
“Long night.”
“Things okay with Adam? I thought you’d be with him.”
“I was. But he found out that I’m not Ru, but Ryunoski Nakimura, pariah of the whole Western world.”
Tommy sighed. “By ‘found out,’ I assume you mean you didn’t tell him, but he found out in some roundabout way. You’re still Ru, even when you’re a dumbass. I think he’ll figure that out pretty fast.” He picked up the guitar and set it aside, then clicked off the digital recorder. “So what happened, and why is there blood on your clothes?”
Ru glanced down, realizing he hadn’t changed. He probably stank too, since he’d been running like mad and that made him sweat. “I hit him.”
“Adam?” Tommy asked, alarmed.
“No. Nate. The guy who was hanging all over Adam. He almost hurt Adam by dropping a weight on him, and then he insulted me, and it just happened.” Ru looked at his hand, flexing it, staring at the dried blood on it. “It was all so fast.”
“Okay, let’s get you cleaned up. Then you’re going to tell me really slow what happened.” Tommy pulled Ru up and shoved him into the bathroom. He turned on the hot water and left him with, “You have ten minutes before I’m coming in to get your ass. Hurry up.”
Ru was out in five. He pulled on a pair of sleep pants and nothing else. His whole body hurt, and he didn’t think it was from the workouts. He’d begun to enjoy them, not only because he was spending time with Adam, but because it made him less tired and his body seemed to feel really good after being pushed hard.
“You been eating?” Tommy asked when Ru dumped himself on a huge cushion beside the couch.
“Yeah, three square and a couple snacks. Protein shake after weight lifting if Adam’s mom doesn’t cook.” Which was rare. Ru’s stomach made a growling noise. He hadn’t eaten yet. He’d been too worried about Adam’s reaction to think about food until now. He got up and went to the kitchen to throw together a protein shake. The chocolate-peanut butter-banana mix tasted really good. He sat back down on his pillow with the shake. “Do I look like I’ve gained weight? ’Cause I feel like I’ve really been killing it in the gym.”
“Nope. You look fine.” Tommy was still looking at him.
“What?” Ru demanded.
“You’re talking about protein shakes and weight lifting like you enjoy it. You, the guy who hates bending over to tie his shoes.”
“Shoes should slip on,” Ru stated. “But yeah. I’ve been working out with Adam. Running every day for like an hour, then another hour of weight lifting. On the weekends it’s longer, and then we go do something fun. Like last weekend we went rollerblading, which by the way, I’m awful at.” But laughing with Adam had been worth the many falls.
“Okay. So explain what happened tonight and why I came home to sailor-mouthed Ru.”
Ru let out a long sign and told him the whole story.
“But you’re going to call him, right? Or at least text him. Adam needs to know those pictures were old—well, the one of Kris. And if you want, I can talk to him to assure him that I’m not banging you.” Tommy kicked off his shoes.
“As if.”
