Bas nodded, though he seemed hesitant.
“You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” Dane said.
But Bas pulled him forward, and suddenly they were kissing. He still tasted of the gelato. Bas stopped a minute to ask, “Can I touch you?”
Dane nodded and took his place back at Bas’s mouth. Bas ran his hands over Dane’s back and down across his thigh. Dane wanted him to touch there. He wanted to touch Bas everywhere. Feel everything. He deepened their kiss, tugging at Bas’s shirt.
“Fair’s fair,” Bas told him. “If I’m stripping, so are you.”
“Okay,” Dane told him and took off his shirt. He smiled when Bas did the same. He ran his fingers through Bas’s chest hair.
“This is nice.” He dove back in for another kiss, letting Bas’s hands run over him. Dane was so hard. Was that normal? He’d never wanted anything as bad as this, nor had anything felt as good.
Bas’s hand fell to where Dane wanted it most, and he couldn’t help but press into the touch.
“Please,” Dane whispered. Bas undid his fly and wrapped a warm hand around him. “Oh God.” Dane scrambled to reach for Bas in the same way. He had to know how good this felt sliding through Bas’s grip. There were no voices in his head, just the feelings racing through his body: excitement, pleasure, joy.
Bas yanked Dane closer, freeing himself and pressing them together, hand gliding over them both, not stopping their kisses for even a second. Dane was lost in the sensation. He held the couch cushion and wrapped his other arm around Bas, not knowing what to do. His hips moved on their own to the rhythm Bas set and the intensity of their kisses.
Something was building like he’d never felt before.
“Bas?” he called, aching for the next step.
“It’s okay. I got you,” Bas told him between kisses. “Let go.”
Dane didn’t understand what he meant by let go, and then suddenly it was there and there was no holding back. He soared, his body trembling with release, small sounds coming from his throat. Heat branded his chest as Bas came with him. They both sat panting, stickiness cooling between them, but Bas still held him, dotting his face with small brushes of his lips.
“That was good. Better than good,” Dane said. “Was that sex? I never had sex that good. They always just sort of took from me in the dark, then walked away.”
Bas kissed him as he tucked them both away and zipped them up. “Don’t think about that. It’s the past. It’s over.” He used his T-shirt to wipe off their chests. “That’s how good it can be when it’s with someone you care for, someone who cares for you.”
“Does this mean I’m gay?”
Bas shrugged. “Does it matter?”
Dane sighed and laid his head on Bas’s chest.
“I think I’m okay with just being Dane, the guy who’s in love with Sebastian Axelrod.”
Bas stilled and said nothing for so long that Dane had to look up. “You love me?” Bas finally asked.
“I think about you every second of every day. I want to touch you all the time. I worry when I don’t know where you are. I hate the thought of someone hurting you. And when that guy flirted with you at the grocery store last weekend, I wanted to rip his hair out and stomp on his knees. Dr. Zander says it’s love. I believe him.”
Bas smiled. “You’re amazing.” He ran his fingers through Dane’s hair. “I’ve been telling myself for weeks that I can’t have you. You needed to heal. I had no right to push my way into your life.”
“But I’m almost a unicorn. I’ll be one soon. So it’s okay if you love me, or even if you just like me a little. I’m not good enough yet, but I will be someday.”
“Sunshine, youarea unicorn. A badass one, at that. Taming dragons and slaying the evil of the world.” Bas kissed him again. “I’m crazy about you. It’s so unfair finding all that I want only to have to move away for school.”
Dane shrugged. “I live in California. And it’s not like I don’t have money to follow you. Bet I could find us a nice place close to campus.”
“You’d do that for me? Go to California? What about the guys? And your job?”
“They are still my friends, whether they’re down the street or across the country. I won’t get to see them as often, but I hope that I’ll be stronger. As long as I’m done with rehab, I will follow you wherever you go. And I’m going to apply for phase four next week. I’m doing so much better. You’re part of that. And while I like working at Dimitri’s, I like you a lot more. Besides, I’m sure there’s a cooking school near there I can go to. I’d love to own a bakery someday.” Dane gripped Bas’s hand, lacing their fingers together. “I don’t know what’s wrong with Tommy right now, but he did a great thing introducing us.”
“Sort of forced us together in the beginning. Trial by fire.”
Dane winced as he thought about those first few days. “I was awful. So hateful. My head was so wrong.”
