The next morning when Elizabeth came down from her bed, she overheard Mrs. Bennet saying to Mr. Collins that she felt it incumbent on her to hint that hereldestdaughter was likely to be very soon engaged, but that she knew of no inclinations with regards to heryoungerdaughters. After asecond’s reflection Mrs. Bennet then added, “Though Lydia is full young to marry, only fifteen, and I do not know if she has the temperament to be a clergyman’s wife.”
When she saw that Elizabeth had entered the room, Mrs. Bennet immediately exclaimed, “What are you doing lazily wandering around at this hour. Go to the kitchen and ask Cook if she needs any help to set the breakfast out.”
Mrs. Bennet said to Mr. Collins, “We have enough servants that my daughters never need to do any work. And we could do well enough without Miss Lizzy’s help, but idle hands are the devil’s playthings. As she has no portion, and no hope or expectations, I believe that I ought to teach her to have habits of industry. She is after all not so well born as my daughters.”
The whole way to the kitchen, Elizabeth smiled at what she thought was Mrs. Bennet’s clear motivation for absenting her. The woman wished to ensure that Mr. Collins would not fix uponheras the relation he meant to marry.
Elizabeth was too much Mr. Bennet’s daughter. The stupidity and slowness that Mr. Collins displayed would be intolerable in great doses. Were Mr. Collins to make her an offer, despite all her situation of dependency, lack of a portion, and uncertainty as to the future, shewouldrefuse him.
This did not even speak to the point that she could have neither hoped for, nor accepted such an offer in good conscience, since he must believe that she was the legitimate child of respectable parents.
The knowledge that Miss Bennet had a prior prepossession did not damage Mr. Collins’s intention of selecting a wife from amongst his fair cousins. However, it was a matter of some difficulty to select which of the two girls that he had been directed towards would be the object of his affection, the companion of his future life.
By right of position, being next to Jane in birth, Mary ought to succeed. But she was inferior in looks to Miss Kitty.
Thus, thinking highly of his rights to that which was most attractive in life, Mr. Collins dedicated himself to the entertainment of Miss Catherine.
Alas, Miss Catherine was not entertained.
For the past weeks, Kitty and Lydia had been obsessed with the news of the officers, the gossip of the mess, and the hope for dancing with a man in regimentals. While Kitty was more sensible, sober, and distractible from this quest than Lydia, she was by no means inclined to attend to the endless speeches upon moral conduct and the excellence of Lady Catherine that Mr. Collins offered.
Over the course of the first day of Mr. Collins’s attendance on them, Kitty frequently retreated to her room, began speaking to Lydia in the midst one of Mr. Collins’s lengthy speeches, and she always sighed very loudly when he caught her alone.
As the less preferred sister Mary watched the gentleman with Kitty, and at certain points she tried to bring him to speak to her instead.
From this she discovered that Mr. Collins also made a practice of writing down things that he wished to remember forever. In his case, rather than improving excerpts from books, it was rare passages from the Holy Book, frequent statements of Lady Catherine’s, and occasional statements from his favorite professor when he was in university.
Mary managed a conversation of an hour’s length solely made up of them passing back and forth such quotations. Elizabeth sat to the side reading and smiling as she half listened to them.
That afternoon before dinner, Mary approached Elizabeth and had her join her when they went to dress. “Help me look a little better today—Lizzy, surely you can.”
“Me,” Elizabeth said with some surprise. Given her general effort to look as unfashionable, mismatched and ill-fitting as possible, she never would have expected to receive such a request. “Do you not think that Jane, or even Kitty might have better thoughts?”
Mary made a face. “I have no patience for Kitty today.”
“Jane?”
“She is effortlessly pretty—it does not matter what she wears, it all looks good on her.”
“That is not true,” Elizabeth replied. “She has excellent natural taste, and a strong sense of what looks best on her. Mrs. Bennet does as well.”
“I don’t want their advice.”
“I am only surprised that you askmineupon such a case.” Elizabeth pursed her lips. “I also confess to a little surprise that you wish to attract Mr. Collins’s attention.”
“Did I say that I did?”
Elizabeth raised her eyebrows.
“Mayhap I only dislike that every gentleman looks at Kitty or Lydia, and never me.”
There was hesitation in Elizabeth’s reply. “I do not know...while I know that you can wear colors that are more flattering, arrange yourself better, Kitty and Lydia are, ah...”
“Three beauties in the family, and I am the plain one. I know. Do not think I do not know—I do not hope to beprettierthan them. Or evenpretty. Perhaps I might achievealmost pretty. And perhaps that might be enough.”
“Do you wish to marry Mr. Collins?” Elizabeth said with some surprise. “He is not a...well that is to say. He is not so very handsome. Nor clever.”
“Not all of us are so pretty as you,” Mary replied.
