“I don’t know maybe less. Maybe I’ll pull a Dante and Anika.”
Danessa clapped her hands. “Wow. Dante and Anika are not the standard, they’re an anomaly.”
“Why are you so pressed?”
“I’m not. If you want to marry some chick you bumped into at a pool party, be my guest.”
“Wait are you mad about a hypothetical baddie at a fake pool party?”
“No, this tour is over.” She tried to shove me toward the door.
“Are you jealous, Danessa Irwin?”
“Of what, your bad taste in women?”
“I picked you.”
“No, you didn’t. I did the picking.”
“Could you stop trying to push me it’s embarrassing?” She’d even leaned into it but I didn’t budge. “If you want me to leave, I’m gone.” My feet remained planted.
“Great.”
“Are you hungry? Because I could feed you.” I was lightweight talking about my dick.
“Umm …”
Shaking my head vigorously I finally backed up toward the door. “You know what, never mind.”
“Wait why?”
“Because anytime a woman says ‘Umm’ the way you just did she’s not interested.”
“I’m interested in dinner and we could stream a movie. But shouldn’t you be outside looking for a wife who’s okay with you referring to yourself as a high value man?”
“You’re not going to let me live that down, are you?”
“It’s a stupid phrase. Are you staying or not?”
“I don’t need a pity invite. I need an enthusiastic yes.”
“I’m not going to beg.”
“I’d love to see that.” My eyes briefly dropped to her mouth, but I quickly reset. “Are we ordering or are we cooking? Because I could probably eat an entire baby cow right about now.”
“I don’t have much in the fridge.”
“Danessa, I grew up poor. I know how to work magic in the kitchen.” Opening the fridge, I found a whole uncooked chicken, celery, half an onion a bag of frozen vegetables, and some unidentifiable soupy sauce in Tupperware. In the pantry I scored with three potatoes. “I can make you dinner, but you have to help.”
“Why are you acting like I can’t cook?”
“Because when we were together you couldn’t.”
“Yes, I could.”
I slammed a can of mushroom soup on the counter. “You gave me food poisoning.”
“That was one time.”
