Me:Fuck me, Alara
Pretty girl:That’s my intention
Me:You’re so beautiful. Can I call you in a bit? I’m going to hang out with my sisters for an hour or so, though
Pretty girl:Call me whenever you want. Is everything ok?
The fact that she knows something is troubling me when I haven’t hinted at it, and all while we’re texting, is truly beyond me. Alara knows me better than anyone.
Me:Yeah. Coach called and I guess I kinda feel down. I just want him to be proud of me.
Pretty girl:He is, trust me. You’re so loved. So talented. Don’t let your negative thoughts tear you down. Call me when you’re ready. Or just come over. My door’s always open for you.
I reply with a heart and pocket my phone before I can let the emotions clog my throat. She’s become my biggest supporter in such a short amount of time, and the way I feel about her is inexplicable.
Still, I can’t help but feel conflicted and confused about what Jordan said earlier. What am I supposed to do?
First off, I’m going to keep my promise to myself and spend some time with Gaby and Val before either heading to her place or calling her.
I don’t really like sleeping in my bed anymore. Alara’s is more comfortable, and I find myself waking up feeling more serene than ever every time I fall asleep curled around her.
The only downside of her place? It’s always so fucking warm. And I swear her feet are like ice. That bratlovesplanting those freezing feet on my bare back.
I don’t realize I’m biting back a smile when I sit in between my sisters, draping my arms around the back of the couch. Staring absentmindedly at the TV and the main protagonists having a heated conversation, I suddenly frown when I feel Valentina’s eyes on me.
“What?” I ask, meeting her gaze. She’s engulfed in a thickthrow blanket that she’s knitted on her own, her head poking out from it.
“You look happy.”
“Yeah?”
Strangely, I feel happy. Happier than I’ve ever been.
If you’d told me weeks ago I’d feel like this, I wouldn’t have believed it. In the back of my mind, it was impossible to find happiness here, especially without snowboarding.
Looks like I’ve been wrong all this time, but my desperation to ride hasn’t tapered off.
Val jabs my thigh with her socked foot. “Do you have a girlfriend?”
I almost choke on air, but keep my face blank. “No?”
“You don’t sound sure yourself.” She even has the audacity to narrow her eyes.
“I don’t,” I say with more conviction. “I mean, I don’t have a girlfriend. Don’t have time for one.”
Val’s shoulders drop as she sighs. It’s a quiet sound, but filled with such disappointment and sadness that my chest twists. She looks back at the TV, and from the way she moves under her blanket, I know she’s folding her arms across her chest like she’s frustrated.
“What’s that face for?” I ask her.
She’s now pouting. “I wish you could stay here,” she answers, her voice cracking. “Wish we were enough for you.”
Oh, fuck, here’s my heart breaking again. “Val . . .”
“I’m serious, D.” When she looks back at me, her eyes are filled with unshed tears. “I’m happy that you get to travel and live your dream, but having you back home and seeing how much you’ve changed in the span of a few weeks makes me really happy. I just miss you and I want you to come back for real.”
Valentina isn’t one to express her feelings much, but I knowshe’s needed me this whole time – I feel it in the intensity of her words.
Swallowing the heavy knot in my throat, I turn to look at Gaby, only to find her staring at my wrist that’s resting near her face. As I follow her line of sight, I inwardly curse. I’ve stolen one of Alara’s hair ties after pulling her locks free, and I’ve been wearing it ever since. I might have a couple more just casually decorating my dresser upstairs. My plan is to steal everything that clips or ties her hair so that she’s forced to keep it down the way I love so much.
