‘I’ve said it before and I feel like I’m going to say it again.’ Marisa’s craning her neck further than you’d think possible to get one last look at Tom out of the back window ‘Tom ishot.’
I nod, a little miserably. Objectively, she is of course right. Subjectively, too, now, I can’t help being very aware of his gorgeousness pretty much the whole time I’m with him.
Marisa turns to face me. ‘Where’s he going in the morning?’
I panic for a moment and then say, ‘Las Vegas.’ (I’ve just been reading a book set there.) ‘With friends. He’s away for ten days.’ I am so bad at lying. It makes me feel very hot and clammy-handed and unable to look people in the eye without making a very big effort and doing it weirdly consciously. So I should really stop embellishing my story and change the subject. ‘Thank you so much for coming to the hospital with me. I’m very, very grateful. Once I’m in there and being seen you should go home.’
‘Nope. I’m staying. I’m working from home tomorrow morning; I’ll be fine.’
I am such an idiot. I really didn’t think this through. The reason I asked Marisa to meet me was that she also lives in Wimbledon, only a few roads away from me. I can’t expect her to stay up half the night with me, though.
Maybe, with hindsight, I should have asked Tom to help me to the hospital and then he could have left and I could have managed by myself.
We could be there forhours. I mean, we almost certainlywillbe there for hours. I cannot do this to Marisa. I’m a grown-up. I can totally wait there by myself.
I’m almost tempted to tell her the truth but I really don’t want to hurt her feelings and she would definitely be hurt, because I’ve been lying to her. I could have told her that Tom was a fake date before taking him to the work drinks. She wouldn’t have told anyone else.
We have to stop. All this lying is an absolute nightmare.
I think I’ll finish this when Tom fictitiously gets back from Vegas. I’ll have fictitiously realised while he was away that our relationship was in fact just a fling. And I will never, ever again do any fake-plus-one-ing.
So now I’m detoxing from blind dating, app datingandfake dating.
‘Nadia? You look as though you’re in a lot of pain?’ Marisa’s concern makes me feel even guiltier; she’s obviously misinterpreted my uncomfortable thoughts for physical pain. Although, to be fair, my ankledoeshurt a lot again after the train journey, despite the second round of painkillers I stocked up on just before we set off. Basically, if I’m not moving it at all, it kind of throbs, and if I do move it or put a bit of weight on it it’s borderline screaming agony and it makes me feel really faint.
‘Just a bit. I’d be very grateful if you’d get me to A&E but then Ireallywant you to go home or you’ll be so tired tomorrow.’
‘Nadia.’ Marisa’s using her sternest voice – the one she uses to get her clients to pay her on time; she has way better payment stats than the rest of us – and it’s genuinely scary. ‘Remember the time when you spent the entire night with me in A&E when Benny put the pea up his nose?’ She had her seven-year-old nephew to stay for the weekend and it wasn’t great. ‘And when you stayed up all night with me after the Christmas party?’ She had four glasses of punch after someone had played an oh-so-hilarious-and-not-at-all-stupidly-dangerous prank and added large amounts of neat vodka to it, and that wasn’t great either. ‘I could go on,’ she continues, still super stern.
‘Yes,’ I say meekly.
‘Right. So you are sober right now and way better company than I was when off my face and vomiting post-Christmas party. And you are thirty-three and not seven and, no offence to Benny, it’s a lot easier to chat all night to an adult woman than a seven-year-old boy because I’m not that into Star Wars or Lego or poo. And therefore, even if I stay there all night with you I will still owe you and I’mgladyou asked me to help.’
‘Okay, thank you,’ I say, still meek. Obviously it’ll be much nicer having her with me than sitting by myself all night. Even Brawl Stars wouldn’t carry me happily through more than an hour or two of solo waiting. ‘I’m very grateful.’
‘No more thanking.’
Hmm, that’s very reminiscent of what Tom said earlier. Maybe I do thank people too much.Ormaybe with this fake-dating thing I’m just making too many unreasonable demands of people and it’s causing me to over-thank.
‘Okay,’ I say. ‘Can I interest you in an addiction to a phone game that Tom introduced me to?’
* * *
It is not at all fun at the hospital and the wait is long and Brawl Stars would indeed not have seen me happily through, but Marisa does; she’s brilliant. The doctor I’m seen by – once I do actually get to see her – is also brilliant. Andobviously– as Marisa and I point out to each other quite regularly during the hours that we’re there – the long waiting times are no-one’s fault but due to successive governments underfunding the NHS; every professional we meet is amazing. (Not every patient we encounter is amazing but that’s kind of par for the course in the middle of the night in A&E.)
My ankle is indeed broken. It’s a very straightforward fracture and should heal very well; I just have to wear a foot boot for the time being and follow a few simple instructions about caring for it.
Tom’s texted me periodically during the night to check that everything’s going okay and to see whether I’ve changed my mind about him coming to the hospital, and when I message him to tell him the final diagnosis, he replies immediately.
‘Cute,’ Marisa says every time she sees me messaging and asks if it’s Tom I’m talking to and I confirm that yes it is. (I’m pretty sure that no-one else I know will be awake at this time.)
‘Itiscute,’ I say, wishing that my heart didn’t beat a little faster every time I see his name come up on my phone.
We finally make it back to my flat at quarter to five in the morning.
Marisa insists on coming upstairs to make sure I’m in safely, even though now I have the boot I’m all good to walk.
Once we’re in there we decide that we’re very hungry. We have pancakes and berries from my fridge, and then Marisa falls asleep on my sofa while I’m in the loo. I try unsuccessfully to wake her and then put a blanket over her and tuck her in and take myself off to bed.
