Inhaling deeply, I smell the coconut shampoo I used before bed. It mixes with the salty tang of my sweat, but it’s different enough from the past that my breathing slows. Then I wiggle my toes one by one and list as many animated movies as I can think of. The longer I list them, the more I’m able to claw myself back to a place of calm.
Once I've pushed the panic attack back, I time my breaths—inhaling for five seconds, holding for five more, then blowing out the air for a final five. By the time I’m done, I’m exhausted. I sink back into the pillows, trembling both from the nightmare and the decisions I need to make.
My rules tell me I should cut my losses and run.
There’s just one problem: I don’t want to.
Today was nice. Fun, even. Riding ATVs through the mountains with Gideon and Callum made me feel fifteen again. Back then, I was the kind of girl who dared to dream of a better life and a love that could conquer anything. That girl was naive.She died the night she turned sixteen. I’d be better off if I left her and her hopeful fantasies buried in the past.
As always, the nightmare was horrible. But it was also an important reminder. I’m being hunted. I can’t forget that, no matter how drawn I am to these guys.
That’s another problem... I see how they look at me. If I’m not careful, I could come between them. A shiver runs through my body. From Gideon's messy, blonde curls and constant touches to Callum's dark gaze and brooding intensity, I’m completely sucked in. I want them in a way that’s both unfamiliar to me and threatening as hell to my survival.
I've literally never had a positive sexual experience, so I'm not sure why my dormant libido is kicking into gear now. Seriously, a few of the fantasies I had today would make the erotica section of a used bookstore blush. I’d do well to remember that their loyalty is to each other. Any tug of war would end with me as the ultimate loser.
Even if I’m the only person I can count on, being lonely is better than being dead. Tears burn behind my eyes, but I don’t let them fall. I stopped crying over boys the day I turned sixteen, right around the time I learned that if I want to be safe, I have to save myself.
GIDEON
I lay on my back, listening to her toss and turn through the wall. Racing breaths, gasps, and the occasional whimper. Sheena has nightmares. Fucked up ones from the sound of it. Each sound makes it harder for me not to kick off my covers and kick down her door.
But how the hell can I help without scaring her more? I have no business kicking down any doors, much less hers. That room needs to be her safe space. I won’t take that away. I can’t—even if every tooth in my mouth grinds to dust from the effort it takes me to stay in my own bed.
She cries out again. The bond rips and tears at my heart until I feel like it might actually yank the organ out of my chest. Claws replace my fingernails and leave little punctures in the bedding as I fight with everything I’ve got to resist the pull to go to her. I’m holding on for now, but there’s nothing left over to control my animal side. I can replace the damn covers, but if my mate leaves, something tells me I’ll have lost a piece of myself I’ll never be able to get back.
I can’t fucking fight her dreams for her, but the people who hurt her... They’re going to pay.
I'll gut them like that coyote, toss their bodies in shallow graves, and lay their hearts at her feet so she can stomp on them.
That crazed thought breaks through my bloodlust, and I shake my head to clear it. Why the hell would she want a bloody, disgusting heart? I’m really losing it.
My senses are all over the place, and I’m wondering if I can even trust them at this point. I didn’t want to tell Callum in front of Sheena, but while I was shifted as a puppy earlier, I thought I smelled wolf. My nose wasn’t at its best in that form, but I could have sworn—no, it’s impossible, especially in my territory. It’s got to be my nervous system going haywire over the mate bond.
Stick to the plan, Gideon.
No scaring her, no pushing for details, no growling, and absolutely no literal bloody gifts. I’m starting to like her, and I don’t think it’s just the magical pull or my instincts to protect. No, under all the fear, there’s someone sweet and maybe just a little wild. We got glimpses of that Sheena today, but if I everwant to earn her trust, I need to be someone new, someone better.
My claws retract, and my mind drifts to my second problem: Callum.
He wants her too. It's obvious, even if he’s trying to hide it from me. Sure, maybe it will wear off for him, but can I deal if it doesn’t? I picture Sheena in my mind, wavy brown hair hanging down her back, a dusting of freckles across her nose, and gentle curves I’m fucking desperate to map with my hands.
Then, I imagine Callum. Dark, dangerous, and dragging the weight of the world’s judgment behind him everywhere he goes. I see his arms—lean muscles covered in the tattoos he got to piss off his dad—reaching out to wrap around her, his fingers rubbing all the places I just know will make her moan his name.
My eyes snap open.
I’m not jealous; I’m hard as a fucking rock. It’s just a dirty daydream, but could Ishareher with him in real life? The woman the gods created just for me. If the legends are true, Sheena is the person who literally completes my very soul. Sharing her shouldn’t work, so why can’t I stop imagining it? Sheena trapped between us, writhing in pleasure and screaming our names. Sheena begging us both for more, her green eyes blown wide with lust as we fuck her in tandem.
Gods fucking dammit.
The urge to slip my hand down into my boxers is nearly impossible to resist. I'm about to give into it—even though I know it’s a total creep move and Callum will know what's happening—when a sob comes through the wall. My erection fades away to nothing.
She’s afraid. Sheena,the woman I’m getting to know and obsessing over, is scared. What’s left of my lust disappears so fast I can barely believe it was there to begin with. New plan. I’ll keep working on my weaknesses, but I also need to playto my strengths, which don’t include dwelling, brooding, or overthinking shit.
First, I’ll find the source of her fear and kill it. Second, I’ll convince her I’m part of her future. If Callum is also part of it, we’ll figure that out when we get there. Hell, if it means someone I trust helps me protect her and rails her into happily ever after by my side, that’s a win-win, right?
We can do this.
I stay awake until her breathing levels off and the tossing and turning stops. Once I'm sure she's left the nightmares behind, I’m finally able to drop my guard enough to sleep.
