“Fuck,” he murmurs, his head falling back against the truck with a soft thud.
“Can you stand?”
“Probably.”
“Can you stand if I help you?”
He picks his head up and stares at me, seeming to catalog every freckle and line on my face. “You want to do this?”
“Yes,” I say again. “Do you?”
He licks his lips and nods. “Yes. But I can’t lie and say this didn’t scare the hell out of me, Lana.”
“I know.” My words are gentle and so is my hand as my palm slides down to rest over his heart. “But I know thatthisbeats for me,”—I swallow hard—“the way mine does for you. It’s wild and crazy but Ican’tand I don’twantto push you away again. I needed this, Mase. It was harsh and awful, but I needed this wake-up call.”
“Baby.” The single term of endearment is full of anguish, my heart breaking all over again.
Moving to kneel between his legs, I cup his face and stare into those bourbon-colored eyes that I’ve lost myself in countless times since we met. “I will do everything I can to make it up to you. To make you believe that I am all in, that we can do this—doanything—as long as it’s together.”
Turning his head, he presses a lingering kiss to my palm, the act both tender and sexy. I ignore the latter because now isnotthe time.
Not even a little.
“I have to learn how to be a partner again,” I admit, surprising him as he lifts his gaze to mine. “It’s not easy, Mason. It’s not easy forme.Doing this with you is easy. When it’s just us, there’s nothing else I could ever need. But the truth is, I don’t know how to do this with a partner. I’ve never had one. Not really. And I’m scared, Mason. I’m scared he’ll try to take my kids.”
“I won’t let that happen.”
“Come inside.” I press a gentle kiss to his lips, one that lacks heat but not importance. “Please.”
Standing slowly, I offer him my hand, a gesture that is far more than me hoping I can pull him off the ground.
He stares at it for only a second, his palm sliding against mine before he tightens his grip, his body shaky as he gets to his feet. Pulling me against him, he crashes his mouth over mine. It’s hard—bruising—and it’s everything I need.
Everything webothneed.
Because tonight I almost lost the only man who makes me feel alive. It’s a mistake I won’t make twice.
28
MASON
Idon’t know how long I kiss Lana in her driveway, but I know when I pull away I feel like I can finally breathe again. Her swollen lips and flushed cheeks make my cock sit up and take notice, but I ignore it because she’s right—we need to talk.
Letting her lead me inside, I kick my boots off by the door while she calls her parents, asking if they’ll keep the kids overnight. She doesn’t look away from me as she tells them about what happened with Jacob. And she doesn’t look away when she says that she and herboyfriendhave some things to discuss.
It feels nice to be acknowledged.
Claimed.
And fuck if every cell in my body isn’t exhausted.
“Are you hungry?” she asks as I collapse onto the couch and let my eyelids flutter shut. I could sleep for days right now.
Because what happened today wasn’t just aboutus. It was all the things I’d never been able to say out loud—all the things that I’d bottled up inside, the things I’d locked away foryears.
“Not right now.”
I feel her sink down onto the cushion next to me, her leg pressing against mine as she laces our fingers together.
