Standing, I drop a kiss on the top of his head, and he doesn’t even push me away.What is going on here?
“Think he’ll throw the ball around with me?”
“Football?”
Beck rolls his eyes as the shower turns off.
Perfect timing.
“Yeah, I think so. I mean you can definitely ask.”
“Cool.” Beck nods and turns dutifully back to his homework, his head bopping around as he scribbles on the paper. He’s so grown and still my little boy. It’s a strange place to be, a place I thought Jacob and I would navigate together.
All the dreams we had.
But had they beenours?Or had they been his? Or mine?
Maybe it was unfair to look at the present and compare it to the past, but cheating aside, Jacob and I had outgrown each other. However, I’d definitely gotten the better deal out of the two of us at the end.
“Mama, can you brush my hair?” Holland says, her pajamas stuck to her body because she still doesn’t dry herself all the way before putting them on.
“Sure, Baby.”
“When’s Mason coming over? Does he live here? How old is he? Does he like dogs? Do you think he’d like Noodle?”
“His hat was here, Holland. He’smetNoodle,” Beck delivers with a whole lot of sass I’m not ready for him to wield. Holland just sticks her tongue out as I type out a text.
LANA: Beck wants to know if you’ll throw the football around with him
MASON: Of course
His immediate answerhas me smiling because Jacob would have to check his schedule. Or have his secretary check his schedule.
His wife.
Heh.
I snicker andwow.For the first time since my marriage imploded,I’m okay. Better than okay.
And I’m thankful I’m no longer just going through the motions in a loveless marriage I was too scared to leave. But I did leave.
I made it.
LANA: Holland has about 5784938 questions for you so—just warning you (laughing face emoji)
MASON: I’ll have to think of some good ones to ask her back
MASON: Maybe some animal facts
MASON: Or stuff about the ocean—cool shit lives in the ocean
LANA: You have no clue how much she’d love that
MASON: I know today wasn’t what we planned but I’m excited to get to know them.
MASON: Also the timeline is on you. Just because we met at the store doesn’t mean we need to jump into it all at once.
LANA: Thank you for saying that. I’m…processing I think
