“I love your body.”
“Maybe now but what about in six months from now? A year? You’re young and in the prime of your life, and I’m stuck in this weird body hell where I still feel overtouched and overstimulated most days.”
“And you just need to tell me when you’re feeling like that so I can help you through it.”
Lana had been distant on and off all week, claiming that she’d been tired from work or things with the kids, but I had a sinking suspicion her ex-husband was somehow to blame. I didn’t want to ask outright, but I was running out of options.
“Gah! But that’s the point! I don’t even know. Sometimes I want my boobs touched and my nipples played with but sometimes I don’t or not at first. And you’re so enthusiastic about oral sex, but how long before it’s not worth it to you, when I’m so in my head and planning grocery lists and wondering if I changed the laundry over that I can’t focus on the pleasure you’re trying to provide.”
I reach for her, taking her hand and pulling her down next to me. “What else?”
She blinks quickly, interlocking our fingers and staring down at where they’re rested in her lap.
“When I turned thirty-one, my body just went haywire. I was trying to keep up with the kids, and trying to be the perfect wife and supporter of Jacob’s career. I was drowning,” she says quietly. “One of the other wives suggested that I try medication to help get me back on track.” Lana shrugs. “It seemed like a good idea, and even Jacob was on board with having hisfun, sexy wife back.”
I squeeze her hand as my other one clenches at my side beneath the blanket. I hope I get the chance to deck this guy.
Preferably in a dark alley.
With no witnesses.
“What happened?”
“I couldn’t orgasm. My body felt numb so even though I had more mental clarity—sometimes at least—I couldn’tget therein the bedroom. So part of me can understand why Jacob?—”
“Don’t you dare make excuses for him.Mendon’t cheat on their wives, Lana. He might have been the financial provider for your family, but you were and continue to be the backbone. Fuck him for making you feel like you weren’t worth the time and energy when your body needed more.”
She swipes at her cheek and clears her throat. “I don’t want you to resent me…this…us.”
“Lana.”
“I’m serious, Mason. I know you think that our age doesn’t matter, but if this works—if we’re together for the long-term—you’ll be in the sexual prime of your life and I’ll be in menopause with hot flashes and mood swings and out of my damn mind.”
I grin because I love that she’s thinking about our future. “I’ll get you a fan and I’ll just buy lots of gray sweatpants to sleep in so you can crank the air conditioning.”
“Stop saying all the right things,” she whispers with a watery smile. “It makes it impossible to resist you.”
“That’s sort of the plan, Dream Girl.” Sobering, I ask, “Where did all this come from?”
“Jacob and I got into it this week because one of the kids mentioned your hat on the counter. He wanted to lecture me aboutwhateverand it turned into a whole thing. It’s exhausting even though he’s a fucking hypocrite, but I let him get into my head.”
I want to ask her why she didn’t tell me, but it seems pretty obvious looking at how absolutely torn apart she is right now.
“I’m sorry he’s such a dick, and I’m sorry I put you into a position that allowed that to happen.”
She swipes at her cheek and clears her throat, the words still shaky. “But it’s not his business and I don’t answer to him. Does it complicate things for the kids? Sure, but we already talked about waiting before I introduce you to them. He didn’t give a shit when he destroyed our marriage and ruined the life we’d made, so why does he get a say in my life now?”
“Some men crave power. Control. You finally moving on is chapping his ass.”
“That’s what Amara said,”—she snorts—“minus the chapping.”
“She’s the other mistress?”
Lana nods. “The one who didn’t know he was married. He married the one whodid.”
“I’ve met some pretty shady people in my life. I’m sure they could make it look like an accident.”
“It’s tempting but I’d really hate to have to settle for conjugal visits in prison.”
