“Do you want that, my dearest?” I press a kiss to the corner of her mouth, enjoying her struggle to stay composed. Maybe her attraction will be enough to satisfy me for now. At least, it’s something.
“It seems rather improper to leave my lips so out in the cold like this. I fear they shall be plagued with consumption shortly and wither away.”
“Well, we wouldn’t want that.” Lightly, I brush my mouth against hers. It’s a gentle caress when I want so much more. “They’re far too lovely for an untimely death.”
With a tender touch, I glide my palm across her cheek and weave my fingers through her hair. With a slight slant of my mouth, I capture her ragged breath.
The eagerness in Aulie’s kiss is so unexpected and intense that it leaves me momentarily stunned. Hungrily, her tongue slides across the seam of my lips, taking me with a fiery possession. Heat courses through my veins as she slowly melts the steel cage around my heart with every pass of her mouth against mine.
My brain jumbles into an incoherent mess, trying to catch up. I’ve wanted Aulie for so long, wanted to tangle my hand in her hair and pull her close, but now that she’s here, in my arms, I can’t shake the feeling that “want” isn’t the right word anymore.
IwantedAulie when I saw her caramel hair barreled in curls, tumbling along her back. IwantedAulie when she was warm and dry in my pajamas the day I pulled her from the fountain. I’vewantedAulie and her starry-stare, gently freckled nose, and soft-pouty lips every second of every day for the past five years.
But lying in the weeds of wanting, something else slowly crept in.
Maybe it was her sweetness or her kindness. Maybe it was all the teasing and banter. Maybe it’s that she has the most gorgeous heart I’ve ever known. Maybe it’s that I feel more comfortable with her than any other human on this earth. Or a combination of all these things, that have led to her soul being a treasure I’d travel to the ends of the earth to uncover.
Whatever the reason.
I haven’t just wanted Aulie for a while now.
I’ve loved her.
Desperately.
And knowing that, realizing that now, as I drink in the sweetness of her lips and develop a severe sweet tooth, I don’t know if I’m emotionally prepared to handle that revelation.
A small moan escapes her as her hands travel under my shirt. The want on her end, mixed with my revelation, surprises me, and I lose my balance.
At some point in the last minute of kissing, I shifted my sitting position, and now I’m on the fountain’s ledge. I wobble, trying not to pull away and ruin the moment. Who knows if I’ll ever get the chance to kiss Aulie again?
Aulie nips at my bottom lip in a slow drag that’s far less innocent than I expected from her. My heart leaps in my chest, and the force propels my entire body backward. My wobble on the ledge becomes an all-out tumble, and I fall over, splashing into the pool of the fountain. Frigid waters soak my chest, before a delicate body collapses on top of me and a secondary wave threatens to drown us both in the shallow pool.
Aulie’ chest heaves against mine. Her mouth falls into a shocked “o” as droplets fall from her thick, hooded eyelashes. Hell, she is gorgeous. My lungs seize. Whether my lack of oxygen is a result of our kiss or the shock of the icy water spilling all over us, I can’t tell.
“I uhm—” She quivers, and I tighten my hold on the small of her back. Her eyes flash to my lips again, and for a second a hope burns deep in my chest that she’s about to lean in for round two. “I—think that’s enough practice for today. Good job.” She pats my chest with chattering teeth. “I have a change of clothes—I’m going to—yup.” She pushes herself up out of the fountain. “You’re good for today. You can go home now if you want to. Bye,” she says frantically, hurrying away.
“Bye?” I manage as she lightnings out of the garden, dripping wet, and I’m left wanting everything we almost had. Even if it selfish. Even if I’m nothing like the dream guy on her list.
Shit. This is going to be a problem.
* * *
I love her.
Splashing my face in the bathroom mirror, the thought that’s looped in my mind for the last twenty-four hours continues to scream past my skull.
The tattoo spiraled across my chest, the one abouther,laughs at me like “no shit, fucker.”
I pull my shirt over my body, trying to silence the ink that was a late-night, too-drunk-to-function decision.
My muscles scream with the stretch. I overdid it at morning skate, trying to get that kiss out of my head.
I should have figured out that I was in love with Aulie before this—but saying she ripped out and possessed my heart years ago is different than saying I’d willingly rip it out for her if she asked, and I’ve never wanted to dwell on how completely gone I am for her.
Because if I’m gone for her, I’m still capable of feeling—both the good and bad, and I have zero interest in feeling the miserable stuff again. Numb has always been my preferred sensation.
Numb is just about the opposite of what I felt yesterday when Aulie filled my hollow chest with every pass of her lips.
