‘Guards, get her out of here!’ the temple maiden shouted.
In moments, the guards had drawn their swords and stepped towards her. Alawani’s agbára shone through his raised palms, ready to protect L’?r?. ‘No!’ his voice echoed. He turned to the temple maiden, ‘I want her here.’
The temple maiden glared at L’?r?, and L’?r? glared right back.
The room stilled.
‘Please give us a moment, Milúà. I’ll come out soon,’ Alawani finally said to the temple maiden.
Milúà turned on Alawani. ‘Whatever this is. End it. Now!’she ordered and stormed out with the guards, leaving L’?r? and Alawani alone in the prayer room.
Alawani rushed towards L’?r?. He tried to hold her, but she stepped out of his reach. ‘I’m sorry, Tèmi. I’m so sorry.’
Tèmi– my own. Her heart skipped in her chest despite her anger. How dare he call her that now? He no longer had the right to.
‘I’ll come back. I’ll survive this,’ he continued. The corners of his lips curved upward, hinting at a smile. ‘I have to, or I imagine you would wage a war with the gods so great, the sun will hide from you.’
She turned towards the door, ‘You have a new family now. I’m the past you mustn’t look back on, isn’t that it?’
He moved closer to her again and, this time, caught her in his arms.
She turned her face away from him. ‘You can say no. I don’t know how many times I need to say this for you to hear me. You don’t have to do what he wants,’ she said, pointing her chin to the king’s portrait.
‘The gods have chosen,’ he said. Before she could speak again, he added, ‘They chose me.’
‘Oh! Alawani! You know they didn’t choose you – the Holy Order did! Your grandfather is pulling your strings. Never, not once since the day of the First Sun, has a prince been chosen as Àlùfáà. Why don’t you ask yourself why? Why now?’
‘I don’t know … I just – please, let me do this.’ Alawani released her from his arms, holding on to her with only his eyes.
‘Last night, you swore by blood. My blood. You promised me –’ Her eyes caught the string of white beads on his wrist. The same ones she’d asked about and he’d slipped off the night before. She looked up at him. ‘When did you get the call?’
‘What?’
‘Don’t play dumb with me, Alawani. When you swore to me, did you already know?’
He silently pulled his hand away. She could read him like a book. So when his gaze fell, and he pursed his lips and pulled his brows together, begging with his face, she knew.
Blood rushed to her head, and she kept blinking to remove the black spots that filled her vision. A quivering rage consumed her, and her voice broke, ‘You – you lied to me.’
He tried to speak, but no words came out of his mouth. It just hung open like a waste basket waiting for flies.
Finally, as the tears poured from his eyes, he said, ‘I knew what was coming, but I wanted you to know – I want you to know that you – you. You are everything to me.’
She reached for the beads and pulled until they snapped and danced across the floor, bouncing like rain around them.
Alawani shut his eyes and inhaled and she thought he’d shout at her but instead, he held her face and wiped her tears. ‘If death threatens, it’s your face that I’ll cling on to. It is for you that I’ll survive this. For you, Tèmi.’ He leaned in so close that his nose slowly moved to touch hers. He breathed in deeply as though inhaling all of her and exhaled in short ragged breaths. The space between them was so insignificant that even though his lips were not touching hers, she could feel them vibrating between soft silent sobs. The tension crackled, a charged silence enveloping them.
The world seemed to still, time slowing as they hovered, breaths mingling, on the cusp of a moment that held the promise of everything they’d dared not speak of. She hated him for what he was doing, for shaking her world so violently, destroying the pillars that kept her hidden and safe. Yet, she couldn’t pull away. But she couldn’t move any closer either. Even without hearing the words, she knew he was asking,Can I kiss you?And she desperately wanted to say yes,to do what she’d only done before in her dreams. But no. Her first kiss with him wouldn’t also be her last. She wouldn’t have him, only to lose him.
Time stood still, and she felt her heart pounding against his chest. Or was it his pounding against her? She held on to him so tightly she forgot to breathe, desperate to freeze time and keep him in her arms forever. Hating herself for not giving in. Hating him for waiting so long to hold her the way he did now. When he finally pulled away, their breaths came in short heavy gasps. She couldn’t describe how she felt even if she tried. Fear, anger, longing – everything.
Her lips trembled, and tears rolled down her face as he placed a warm kiss on her forehead. That was what broke her. She couldn’t fight it any longer. She raised her eyes to his, and the corner of his lips twitched. He rubbed her tears away with his thumb and lifted her chin.
‘The Order is waiting. It’s time to go.’ Milúà’s voice froze them in place.
L’?r? shut her eyes and frowned. How could she hate someone she’d just met so much?
Alawani let out a deep sigh and lowered his head to rest on the nape of her neck. ‘I’m so sorry, Tèmi.’ Then he turned to follow the maiden out of the room. Those were his last words to her.
