‘Ah, OK.’ He huffs, not even trying to mask his disappointment. ‘We’ll see each other again, though.’
He creeps slightly closer, towering over me and biting his lip. It would be something, I guess, if I wasn’t so focused on my perfect view up his nostrils.
‘Sure,’ I answer, attempting to convince myself too.
I suppose, given how things picked up after the initial awkwardness, I have no reasonnotto see him again. He is cute, and he’s tall, and I have no real reason to say no. Isn’t the point of this whole thing with Aiden to say yes more often?
‘I’d really like that,’ I say, doubling down.
‘You’re really sexy, you know,’ he says, forcing his voice an octave deeper.
He shuffles closer to me as his right hand squeezes mine even tighter, left swinging to cup the back of my head (although it ends up being more of a slap). He looks down at me hungrily as he leans in, in a way that makes me want to run. I don’t want toreally. I know that. I’m just being stupid and focusing too much on how fishlike he looks from this angle.
I taste rum and Coke and strawberry vape on his tongue as it forces its way in between my teeth. It’s sloppy and drunk, and excitedly flapping out of control, but I do my best to manoeuvreit from my end. We find some sort of rhythm; still choppy, but slightly more to my liking as his hands move straight to my backside. He squeezes both cheeks tightly while pulling me into his crotch, my balance faltering and leaving me no choice but to wrap my arms round his neck. I hold on tightly, my heels lifted off the ground in a way that feels more like falling than flying. His lips are soft, that’s a plus, and he seems to like what we’re doing, given the way he’s moaning into my mouth. But the moans seem forced– he’s sounding off because he feels like heshould– because it’s how he saw the moment going in his head. I would fake moan too but, frankly, nothing would give me the ick more, so I focus on his lips and try to drown the sounds out.
‘Woah,’ he says, finally pulling away. ‘You sure I can’t jump in that car with you?’
‘Not tonight,’ I say again. ‘I really should get home.’
After one more sloppy kiss he heads to the Tube station, leaving me to wait for my taxi in the dark outside the bar, alone. I finally check my phone properly for the first time since I got to the place, finding a slew of texts, voice notes and missed calls from Kimi.
Been in meetings all day. Sorry I missed the outfits!
How was it?!
Are you OK?!
If we don’t hear from you in five mins we’re calling the police.
She’s in the group chat as well, all three debating my welfare, complete with screenshots of my location and a physical description of Benji.
All good, alive, date just ran late! Debrief tomorrow xxx
I make sure to share the details of my ride with them the second I get in the car, before anyone has a chance to report me missing, and then I sink into the leather seat and reflect on the night at hand. The car moves through the night, Brixton a blur to my right, but I do not look. My eyes are glued to my phone, scrolling through my camera roll with a new mission at hand.
I find a blurry but decipherable picture of the shot glasses from the night, empty and strewn across our table. The photo is grainy and discoloured from the bar’s terrible light, but it’s clear enough to be fit for purpose. The wordonlinepops up briefly under Aiden’s name almost instantly after I send it, turning the ticks on the message blue before disappearing again.
I lean back in my seat and sigh as I stare out the dark window.
Well, at least tonight can’t get any more disappointing.
Nudge 21
The Residual Flirtation
‘Sorry, could you say that again? I lost you there.’ The reverb spits my voice back at me in chunky, robot-like fragments.
‘I said your signal is shit,’ Aiden says, his face so clearly unimpressed in the small, faded image.
‘Who says it’smysignal?’
He huffs. ‘I’m restarting the call.’
I woke up this morning with the headache to end all headaches, birthed by those shots and raised by my distinct lack of sleep. At first, I tried to fight it– snooze my alarm and convince myself that I’d be bright and perfect by the fourth time it went off, but it was to no avail. The thought of leaving my house made me want to cry until I was out of tears. So, after a quick call with Pippa about a fake emergency, I managed to switch my scheduled work-from-home Friday for today.
Aiden was thrilled; it meant he got to stay home too and avoid a trip to the Abbingtorn building. The downside? We both have to spend the day working through a Teams call on my hit-and-miss Wi-Fi connection.
‘Maddison, when are you folding those clothes? I have washing to do too.’ Mum tuts as she barges through the previously closed door.
