Hours passed as I tended to the pile of laundry in their washroom, the kitchen full of dirty dishes, and the basement was dusty. I did what I could before I called it quits. After all, my parents just liked the fact that I was around and giving them attention. During my modeling days, they rarely saw me unless the shows were semi-local. I could only imagine how content they were right now.
Once I was done, I took a minute to visit my old room. They were so nostalgic that they didn’t change a thing but my bed. It was no longer a full size but a queen. The pictures on the wallsalong with the posters were still intact and dust free. They could keep my room together but not the house. That was funny to me.
I picked up the body mist from Bath & Body Works that used to have me in a chokehold and smiled. Oh, I thought wearing these fruity scents was the shit back in the day. You really couldn’t tell me nothing. I’d come a long way and was no longer interested in the things I was when I was younger. My iPod sat on my dresser with the wired headphones wrapped around them. There was a time where I thought singing could be a side hustle. Music was my escape.
“Che-Che, have you thought about what I said?” my mama softly spoke, entering the room behind me.
“You have got to announce yourself before sneaking up on me like that, Mama. And what am I supposed to be thinking about again?”
“Giving me and Obasi a grandchild… preferably a granddaughter. I think it’s time don’t you think? You’re almost thirty years old and with your condition, it could get riskier.”
I sat on the bench that sat at the bottom of my bed. I had thoughts on kids every time I dealt with the little ones down at the agency. The babies were absolutely adorable, and the toddlers pulled at my heart strings. There wasn’t a time when the thought of having someone to love me unconditionally didn’t surface.
However, I stayed away from a lot because of my fibromyalgia. I didn’t want to be anyone else’s burden and the pain Nesh said labor bestows wasn’t helping my condition at all. If anything, my ass would be doped up somewhere not able to function before I could deliver the child. I wasn’t about to put anyone, especially my child, through any unnecessary stress.
“If God allows it Mama, then sure. I’ll give you and Dad a grandchild,” I said telling her what she wanted to hear. Chinara wasn’t going to stop if I didn’t.
“There you go telling me what I want to hear as you did when you were a little girl. You do know I know when I’m being put at ease. I raised you and that hasn’t worked on me in years. This is on our Christmas list so whenever you get around to it, that’d be nice.”
I had to laugh at her response because it was innocent, but it was also entitled in a way. I guess I made them into the spoiled adults they were. It was a promise I made a while back; I just wasn’t expecting her to keep pestering me about it. If I ever gave a man the time of day for real, maybe it would happen. As of now, I wasn’t searching for anything new in my life.
“Christmas, Mama? That’s in like four months and my thirtieth birthday is before that. I know you aren’t expecting anything from me within that time frame. Look, when I meet a man that’s good enough, I will gladly open my womb to him. Are you satisfied?” I was over the topic at hand already.
“I can see I’ve aggravated you. My guess is you’re about to leave then.”
“I am and it’s not because you aggravated me. I have an appointment with Dr. Frances in about thirty minutes. I’ve given you and Dad enough of my time. I will bring you something nice in a few months and it’s not in the form of a baby. See you later, Mama. I love you.”
Standing, I approached her giving her a quick kiss on the cheek. I was out of there before she could even grasp what was happening. I loved my parents deeply, but I refused to give them a damn grandchild all because that’s what they asked for. Some things were nonnegotiable.
Walking out the front door, I pressed the button on my keys to unlock my car door. I climbed inside and got comfortable as I released a deep sigh. My mother was worrisome and once she got started so would my father. I didn’t have time for that conversation today. All I wanted was to get this appointmentover with so I go could go home and relax before I gave my all to the kids at the agency in two days.
Starting the car, I backed out the driveway and headed in the direction of Dr. Frances place of employment. A Woman’s Touch was where I’d gone since I was eighteen. A lot of the doctor’s there new me by first name and vice versa. They were more than sweet and helpful. When Dr. Frances couldn’t take me, one of them would volunteer. They loved me down there which made the visits more warming. It didn’t feel like I was just another woman with issues.
The drive was approximately thirteen minutes away from my parents’ home. The traffic was light, and I was able to cruise without getting frustrated with the many residents in Sage Springs. By the time I arrived, I had seven minutes on the clock to check in. I made good timing. I doubled checked my purse to make sure I had my calendar that tracked my episodes since my last visit before exiting the car.
Entering the building shortly after, I noticed the lobby was pretty packed out. I checked in and took the first seat I found available. Being in a crowded environment wasn’t new but it was overwhelming. I truly hated it. Squeezing everybody in at one time was something I never really understood.
“Afor.” The nurse stepped from behind the closed door with a file in tow, calling for me. The many glares I got from being called first was comical. Dr. Frances didn’t play about me. I made my way over to the nurse and entered the same door she surfaced from. “First thing’s first, let’s get your weight. Step on the scale for me.”
I did so and a smile cracked my lips.Mhmm, get thick on them, Che!It wasn’t nothing but ten pounds. Nevertheless, I was gaining and proud of it. I’d been at a solid 125 pounds since I was eighteen. This would be little to a lot but as a model, the gain is more than something to brag about.
Once she was done getting my weight, she led me down the hall to an exam room. Entering, I placed my purse on the counter and took a seat in the chair next to it. Sitting on the table like a child wasn’t really my thing. The nurse started on my blood pressure and all that other shit before taking a seat of her own.
“Okay, Cheyonne, how’s it going? Has anything changed? Is there anything Dr. Frances should know about?”
“Uh, yeah. So, I still get my episodes but the duration of them is getting longer. They’re not lasting hours anymore, it’s progressed to days now. It takes darn near a week before I’m completely myself again. I’m not used to this,” I answered.
“When was the last one?”
“I’d say maybe a month ago. I was under a lot of pressure with the recent show in Milan and overexerted myself. I felt it coming but it happened before the show, so I was good to go when it was time to walk. I’m actually really good right now. No tingling, no pain, no headaches, no dizziness… I’m fine.”
She nodded and went to pecking on her keyboard. A knock rang out on the door and in walked the lady of the hour. Dr. Frances held a smile on her face as she always did and a strong floral scent followed. Nothing changed with her.
“My favorite Barbie. Cheyonne it’s so good to see you,” she sang.
“It’s good to see you, too, Dr. Frances. How are you?”
“Great. Thanks for asking.”
