“I know I’m not as pretty as she is, but I’m here if you need an ear.”
With a raised eyebrow, she quickly said, “I’ve seen so little of you that I almost forget you’re here.”
He knew his removal from her life probably confused her a little bit, but it kept him sane. The more time he spent in her presence, the harder he found it to deny his attraction for her. “As you know, it’s been a super busy time at work,” he said, using a very poor excuse. “I get pulled in a lot of different directions in the spring and summer. I barely find a free minute in any given day.” He gestured toward the back of the room. “Come outside. We’ll sit in the gazebo.”
“Are you going to rescue me?” she asked, leading the way. It made him think about the times she’d played a helpless princess in the tower, trapped in the gazebo as one of the brothers battled the other two with plastic swords to rescue her.
“I wonder if we could talk Ken and Jon into playing again,” he said. “Though I think you’ve probably proven that you can get yourself out of the tower.”
She looked over her shoulder at him, her lips in a thin line. “Sure, by being thrown out of it.” His face fell, and clearly she saw it because she immediately said, “I’m sorry. That wasn’t nice.”
Clearing his throat, he brushed by her and led the way into the dining room and through to the kitchen. At the back door, he stopped and waited for her to catch up before opening the door and stepping aside to let her by. “You need to quit apologizing to me.”
“I’m so—” She stopped and lowered her eyes, then turned and walked straight to the gazebo with her shoulders back. He followed more leisurely. When he got to the gazebo, he found her standing with her back against the railing, her arms folded in front of her almost in a defensive manner.
“Is that what you learned to do? To constantly apologize?”
“I beg your pardon?”
“When Tyrone was using you to prove to himself that he was a man, did you constantly apologize?”
“Actually, it’s classic behavior for—”
Feeling angry at himself and enraged at Tyrone, he held up a hand to cut her off. “Forget it. That was rude. Please forgive me. Sincerely.”
He watched the hesitation on her face before she relaxed and nodded. “I accept your apology and will try to refrain from saying ‘I’m sorry’ from now on.” She sat on the bench and looked up at him. “How are you? I’ve missed seeing you regularly since our ‘date date, like a romantic date’ night.”
Intentionally forcing himself to relax, he sat next to her and turned his body in her direction. “I’ve been great. How are you since the dedication at the church? It seemed to have an emotional effect on you.”
She took a deep breath through her nose. “You know, I’ve been so angry for so long that I just didn’t know how to let it go. Your mom gave me my mom’s journals to read and they really opened my eyes to a lot of things. Now I find that I’m seeking God, wanting to rediscover a love that I had once but not sure how to go about doing it.”
The flood of joy in his heart overwhelmed him. He reached for her hand and watched her start to recoil at the sudden movement, then intentionally place her hand in his. “I think once you acknowledge to God that you’re seeking, He’ll find a way to let you hear Him.” Her fingers felt cool in his hand and he covered them with his other hand, wanting to give her some warmth. “How can I help you?”
Unexpectedly, her eyes filled with tears. “I was hoping Auntie Rose could help me. I remember her always being ready with words of wisdom when we needed it, and my mom’s journals were filled with her and her insights.”
Brad looked at his watch and at the sky. “I could call her, ask her to come home.”
“No. It’s okay.” She pulled her hand out of his and pushed her fingers against her eyes as if to try to stem a coming flood. “It’s waited this long.” Releasing a long breath, she stretched her legs in front of her and crossed them at the ankles. “It’s been a long couple of weeks.”
In the silence that followed, Brad searched for the right thing to say or do. He came up with, “Do you want to go for a swim?”
“Not particularly.” Leaning her head back against the railing, she closed her eyes. “Remember that big hammock that all four of us tried to get into and ended up wrapped up in and your mom had to cut us out?”
They’d been about six. He remembered his mom didn’t get mad because they got stuck. She got mad because she’d specifically told them they couldn’t get into the hammock. He chuckled. “So many memories, so many punishments.”
“We were a bit of a handful. I can’t imagine how she did it.”
His answer came out without even thinking about it. “With love. She loved us. Still does.”
“Love conquers all,” she murmured.
Love conquers all. Maybe it would conquer her heart and lead her back to God. “And God is love,” he remarked, quoting first John.
Valerie straightened her spine and she suddenly had to confirm her suspicion. “Brad, is the reason you left my house the night of the restaurant opening because I told you I don’t believe in God anymore?”
Her directness surprised him, and he answered honestly. “Yes. I don’t have the freedom to pursue a relationship with a woman who doesn’t have the same heart for God that I do. The Bible warns against it, and common sense tells me it would weaken my faith rather than increase hers.”
She opened her eyes and stared at him, her eyes serious, hard, searching. “My seeking has nothing to do with you. Nothing at all.”
