“Yeah, no, I’m not.” I zipped up my coat. “Can you move because I have to go home? I need to feed my cat.”
He growled deep in his throat. “You don’t have a cat.”
“How do you know? You haven’t been to my apartment in—What are you doing?” I gasped when he started walking forward and pushed me back until I felt his bed at my knees. “CC, what the hell?”
“I told you to stop it.” His eyes flashed with anger and something else. “You’re so much better than that, princess. Are you filming with other people? Is that how you got hurt because some prick thought he could touch you and didn’t like it when you said no?”
I swallowed nervously but raised my chin in defiance. “It’s called collaborating. I make double the money that way.”Poke the bear, Ezra. Good job.
“Don’t try to be funny!” CC roared. “You could have been killed! Look at your beautiful face, your body! God fucking damnit!”
Did he just call me beautiful?No, be strong, Ezra Quinn.“But I wasn’t. And that was an actual date. Not someone I was collaborating with to make money.” I mean, sort of.
“But you could have. Then what? I would been forced to bury you?” His voice trembled. “Why are you doing this to your body? You’re so much better than that, boo, and I just don’t understand why you can’t see that. You had dreams to design your own clothes. What happened to that?”
I felt my resolve crack. “Those are just dreams, CC. Don’t you understand? I’m good at selling my body, using it to help men get off, and that’s it. It’s not bad. I enjoy showing my body off. I’m pretty, and men like to look at me. They spoil me. It makes me feel good.” Sometimes. Other times, it made me feel used and dirty.
“Who told you that?” He gripped my chin between his thumb and forefinger.
I licked my lips as I stared up into his dark eyes. “No one, it’s just who I am. Who I’ve always been.”
“Carson, should I just leave?” Noel asked from the doorway. “I think... Yeah, I think I should just go.”
CC took a step back, his hand dropped from my face, and he spun around. “Look, this isn’t what it looks like.”
“I know.” Noel nodded. “But I think it might be if you two wanted it to be. I’ll stay at the hotel tonight and go home tomorrow. I shouldn’t have just showed up without talking to you first.”
“Are you breaking up with me?”
This was awkward. Maybe if I just went into the closet, they could do whatever this was, and I wouldn’t be privy to it. Or the bathroom? Would they notice me? Plug my ears with my fingers? Hum a little something? That might work.
“Do you honestly feel anything when we’re together? Like anything at all? You’re a nice guy, Carson, but I’m just...I don’t know what I am. Maybe I need to get my head together, too.” Noel sighed.
CC’s shoulders slumped. “I’m a nice guy, huh?”
“Is that not what I should say? I mean, we have fun, but I don’t feel a spark or an attraction. I never feel that with anyone, though, so trust me when I say it’s not you,” Noel assured him.
“Maybe you’re like pan or whatever,” I suggested, then instantly regretted it.
CC glared at me before he continued, “Can we talk about this first? Alone?”
“I don’t think so.” Noel nodded at me. “Take care of him, Ezra.”
Well, didn’t I always? He was mine. “Sure will.” I gave him a thumbs up and winked.
When Noel had left us alone again, CC spun around. “Now you’re going to spill your guts.”
“Did your boyfriend not just breakup with you? Don’t want to cry on my shoulder about that first? Come on, big guy, hug it out.” I opened my arms.
“Fuck off, Ez, this is serious. No more selling your body like fucking Julia Roberts inPretty Woman,do you hear me?” he snapped. “Now, tell me what else you’ve been doing that will really piss me off.”
I gasped. “I’m not a whore, CC, I’m a camboy. There’s a difference.”
“Sit that little ass down and talk. Now, before I do it myself.” He pointed to the bed.
I shook my head. “I’m going home.”
“Ezra.”
