“Do you want me to go home?”
It was like a knife to my back. I didn’t. I wanted Jillian to stay here forever, because with her, I felt like everything was going to be okay. “Whatever,” I muttered before I walked out the door.
I had beaten the living shit out of the heavy bag that was set up in the basement of my parents’ house. Hit it over and over again until I knew my knuckles were bleeding, but that was my fault too. Just like everything else. I was so fucking stupid to think that whatever was happening between us was going to continue when Jillian left for New York. When I returned, Jillian was gone, and it made me feel numb all over.
I dragged my hands through my damp, sweaty hair as I paced the apartment. Forgetting about Jillian was the right thing to do...
I shoved the front door open, sprinted down the stairs, and across the front lawn, stopping only to make sure there were no cars before I crossed the street. I climbed up the lattice fencing to her room like I did it every single day to tap on the outside of window with my knuckle, hoping she was alone. Praying she was there.
Jillian appeared at the window with confusion on her face. “We have a door,” she muttered, and I saw the tears on her cheeks, in her eyes. Fuck, I did that to her. I made her cry. Why was I such an asshole?
“Let me in.”
“Why?”
“Damn it, let me in before I rip this screen off,” I growled. Her eyes flashed before she slid the screen up. I climbed into her room while she watched me sternly, her arms folded over her chest. She must have showered because she had changed into a pair of tiny little tan shorts with a matching shirt. “I’m a fucking idiot, Jills.” I dropped to my knees, keeping my eyes at her feet. “I’m so damn sorry. You have to—” I stopped when her hands touched my chin and she forced me to look up.
“Don’t call yourself an idiot, baby,” Jillian whispered. I grabbed her hips, pulling her closer so that I could press my face against her taut stomach. Her scent overtook me and my eyes filled with tears while Jillian ran her hands through my hair. “You stink.” She chuckled, and when I looked up, she had a smile on her face. “You didn’t even shower before you came to see me?”
“I couldn’t wait. I needed to make sure you weren’t going to break up with me,” I admitted.
Jillian smoothed her fingers against my cheeks. “Hutch.” Her voice sent shivers up my spine and straight to my balls. She was it for me. How was that even possible? I had known her my entire life, only as my little brother’s girlfriend’s sister, and in a matter of weeks, she had changed my life.
“Jillybean, you have made my life worth living again,” I blurted out before I lost my nerve. “I don’t know what it is about you, but when we’re together, I just want to live. I want to be the old me, whether you know it or not...” Her fingers pressed against my lips as she got down to her knees to join me.
“I’m not going anywhere, Hutch,” Jillian assured me before she slid her mouth over mine. “I promise you that I’m not breaking up with you.” I knew she felt the smile that had broken out over my lips because she pulled back. “You look so happy when you smile, baby.”
“It’s because of you.”
“I’m sorry I left.”
I leaned my forehead against hers. “Thanks for letting me in,” I whispered.
There was a knock at the door before Jo pushed the door open. “Jill, do you still...oh, hey.” She twisted her lips to the side. “Um, I can come back.” She looked between the two of us.
I started to get to my feet, but Jillian grabbed my arm, keeping me where I was. “What’s up?” Jillian asked her sister.
“You guys want to hang out tonight?” Jo asked. “Pat and I were thinking of having a fire at the beach.”
Jillian turned to look at me. It was the last thing I wanted, but her eyes told me it’s what she wanted, so I gave a quick nod. The smile on her face told me it was the right answer. “We’ll be there.”
