The evening sun barely peaked over the rooflines of the houses in Zach’s neighborhood when Cael pulled into his driveway, still berating himself over the whole incident at lunch today. The first thing Cael had prepared to do was apologize to Zach.
Cael let himself in as he always did and found Zach in the kitchen, leaning back against the counter, in the middle of a phone conversation.
As he clicked the door shut behind him and turned the deadbolt, Zach’s heartrending gaze locked on Cael’s, tearing him to pieces inside. Zach motioned him over, and he approached quietly, setting his keys on the counter and pausing just steps away from him.
“Mmm-hmm. Okay,” Zach croaked, his voice obviously strained.
Zach closed his eyes and pressed two fingers to the furrowed space between his eyebrows the way he always did when he was overly stressed or upset.
“Yes. I understand. Thank you for the update.” Without looking up, Zach set his phone on the counter behind him and pressed his lips into a tight, thin line.
“What is it, Zach?” Cael said softly, moving a few steps closer to him. “Was that the doctor? Is Abbey okay?”
Zach’s shoulders rose and his chest expanded with a slow, deep breath. He removed his fingers from his forehead and bracketed his hand on the edge of the granite counter, finally looking up at Cael again. Zach’s eyes shimmered with unshed tears Cael knew he fought to keep from falling.
“Yeah.” The word tumbled out in a rushed, hoarse whisper, as if speaking right now would cause him to lose complete control. “The swelling in her brain’s gone down, but otherwise, no change. She’s stable.”
“Okay. Well, that’s good news, isn’t it?”
Zach nodded, staring back at Cael with so much more than pain in his eyes, and Cael felt as though he could do nothing at all to make it go away, because Cael was not at all who Zach needed right now, and he never would be.
Chapter 5
Cael held two sides of the cherry wood crib to keep them from falling as Zach bolted them together, remembering back to the first time he and Cael had built it. Zach had bought the crib as a gift for his sister, and he and Cael had put it together in her apartment just weeks before Taylor was born.
Just as Zach tightened the last bolt, the doorbell rang.
“I’ll get it,” Cael said, disappearing from the room.
Zach sat on the plush, carpeted floor of Taylor’s temporary bedroom, staring at the partially pieced-together crib as he waited for Cael to return. All they had left to do was attach the metal spring frame and drop the mattress in and they would be done, and Taylor would have her normal bed back again.
Putting a crib together in his own home was something Zach had always imagined would be a happy occasion, but this was far from that. It was heartbreaking from every angle. He was supposed to do it in preparation for his own child with the person he’d one day marry. Instead, he was doing it with his best friend because his sister was in a coma from which she might never wake and her daughter had no father.
At least he wasn’t completely alone. Cael was here, as always, but even having his best friend at his side left Zach’s heart aching. Cael loved Taylor, and he settled in to taking care of her as if she were his own. It was obvious from their interactions that Taylor loved Cael back. Watching the two of them together made Zach yearn for the family and love he’d been searching for while reminding him that one day, Cael would move on with his own family, and big part of Zach didn’t want him to.
A large, gentle hand landed on his shoulder. “Hey, Pook, you okay?”
Zach tilted his head back and looked up, catching Cael’s warm, concerned gaze, and for some weird reason, Zach imagined Cael leaning down to kiss him. In a fraction of a second, a strange warmth shot through him and his heart stuttered. He blinked and looked back at the crib, taking a deep breath.
“I, uh…” Flustered, Zach shook his head. “No,” he sighed.
Cael gave his shoulder a firm squeeze.
“Who was at the door?” Zach asked, still trying to understand the unexpected image in his mind. It had to be stress.
“I figured tonight was a beer and pizza kinda night,” Cael said, loosening his grip and letting go. “That was the pizza I ordered a little bit ago when you were getting Taylor changed and situated in her playpen.”
“Oh. Okay.”
“Do you want to eat now, or finish this up first?”
“We’re almost done. Let’s just finish so we don’t have to worry about it.”
“You got it.” Cael grabbed the spring frame as Zach pushed himself off the floor. After attaching it to the inside of the crib, Cael helped Zach put the mattress pad and pink, fitted sheet on the mattress and they set it in the crib.
When they were done, Zach stood with his arms crossed over his chest, staring at it. His chest tightened.
Fuck, it wasn’t supposed to be like this.
