Because she was consumed by thoughts of last night.
Last night had been…
Incredible.Not that it was surprising that a notorious rogue would live up to his reputation when it came to his prowess in bed.
It had also been illuminating.About herself, about whoshewas.Someone who liked to take control.She could ask for what she wanted.She dusted the feather of her quill over her chin.It wasn’t a position she’d ever been in before.She’d always followed Warren’s lead when they’d been together, fumbling through their firsts, learning each other.She’d been so nervous she’d do something wrong, something to deter his interest… It had never even occurred to her there might be parts of herself she’d been unknowingly silencing; hidden desires she’d never had the chance to explore.That would make her feel powerful.
With that power came the third truth: it had been liberating.Freeing.He'd given her back her agency.No.She'dtaken it back for herself.Derek had understood.Had known what she needed.He always seemed to know what she needed.That was the heart of it, wasn't it?Somewhere between the calculated schemes and reckless nights they'd revealed fragments of their true selves.She wanted more pieces.To put them together until she saw all of him.
Except for the fact that something very strange had happened last night after their intimacy had come to itsconclusion.The silver-tongued Marquess of Dunmore…had turned tongue-tied.The man had beenawkward, had barely been able to put a coherent sentence together before he’d fled her rented rooms like his breeches were on fire.Not only that, he’d beenblushing, his cheeks flaming red.
Which was curious.Livy was curious.She would have found it all rather endearing…if she had any idea what it meant.She absently drew a swirl on the parchment in front of her.She really wanted to find out what it meant.
“Oh dear, my head aches something dreadful.”
Livy glanced up, a smile pulling at her lips.“I wonder why that would be?”she teased.
Her aunt huffed.“I blame Lady Rutledge.Without her bosom chum at her side, she tasked me with the role, and I am not as young as those two ladies.Apparently, as you age, you cannot eat nor drink as much.”
Livy pointed her quill at her aunt and raised her brows meaningfully.“You didn’t seem to mind much when you two were whispering behind fans last night.”
“Yes.”Her aunt’s lips tilted softly.“It was a splendid evening, and I quite enjoyed Lady Rutledge’s company.She’s different from other ladies of the ton.She isfun.”
Livy chuckled to herself.Yes, Franny was fun.The woman was made of sunshine, her joy infectious.
“I didn’t fail to miss how familiar you and Lord Dunmore were while I waswhispering behind fans.If you meant to set the ton talking, I’ve no doubt you two with your heads huddled together in full view of the theater did the trick.”
It had been the last thing on Livy’s mind.All she’d wanted to know was how Derek was faring after everything.To see him, speak to him.She hadn’t even cared what about.It had been…calming…being in his presence after everything.All the noise had settled when they’d locked eyes, the bad fading away, only hope and possibility left.
“It definitely should improve the way I’m viewed in society,” Livy murmured absently.“Being seen in the Duke of Ironcrest’s box, conversing with the Marquess of Dunmore.”
“Mmm.”
Livy’s gaze snapped to her aunt’s.There’d been something in that “mmm”.A disbelief.
Aunt Mellie smiled softly.“I may be a horrible chaperone, Olivia.But I’m not a fool.I know we came here with the objective of winning someone’s attention.Did you think I’d believe you didn’t have someone in mind already when you came up with your plan to take over the ton?You had a target.If I’m not mistaken by the visitor to the box last night, that target used to be a Mr.Thorton.”
Livy rolled her lips in and nodded slowly.She didn’t fail to notice her aunt’s phrasing.
“But…he’s not who you have your sights on any longer?”
Livy frowned.Did that make her fickle?Impulsive?Derek’s words from the night they met assaulted her.
I will prove that you are no different from every other woman walking this earth.Flighty.Unfaithful.Inconstant.Only ever concerned with your own selfish desires.
“What’s on your mind, Olivia?Your face is doing much more talking than your mouth is.”
Livy let out an enormous sigh and flopped backward on the chaise.Thechaise.Her choice of seating was not helping the confusion in her brain right now.“You’re correct.On all fronts.I came here with the intention of convincing Mr.Thorton I was worthy of his hand in marriage.And somewhere along the way…everything has gotten all mixed up.I…I don’t want to marry him any longer.”
“But Lord Dunmore?”Aunt Mellie prodded.
Livy’s eyes slid shut.“Yes,” she whispered, finally admitting it out loud.Finally admitting it to herself.“I want to marry Lord Dunmore.”Heaven help her.She wanted to marry the most marriage-averse man in London.
The cushion of the chaise dipped, and Livy’s eyes popped open.Her attention landed on her aunt sitting by her feet.
“Why do you admit it like it’s a confession?”
“Is it not…foolish?Weak-willed?For five years, I had thought Mr.Thorton was my future.I wanted him to be my future.More than anything.Forfive years.And now, after—what?A month—I’ve decided to throw all that away?For one of the most notorious bachelors of the ton, of all men.”She winced.“Just saying it aloud, I sound like I’ve lost all sense.”
