“What have I done?!” Layla sobbed, coughing in hard spasms as that black void threatened to swallow her. Something felt wild in her head and Layla wanted to scream, to rage and roar and heave to get it out. Twisting in Reginald’s arms, she tried to get away but he held her fast. With a real roar, Layla slapped at the water, then slapped at him. But hitting her hands into his flesh only made her roar and twist more, and it only made him hold her closer. Before Layla knew it, she was pummeling Reginald’s chest with her fists, screaming as she bit his skin to stop her roars.
As he just held her – weathering her storm.
At last, Layla came to silence, heaving hard breaths as he cradled her close. As that black pit rose up hard inside her now, threatening to drag her under completely, Reginald soothed those tides back with a wave, crooning a lullaby in her ear. Layla could feel the influence of Fury’s woe and his Siren in their Bind now – threatening to swamp her into that deep, dark place. The void inside her surged up far harder than ever before, and Layla gasped like a drowning woman as all of Fury’s self-hate surged inside her.
Augmenting her own a hundredfold.
“Easy,” Reginald spoke, nuzzling her cheek. “Be gentle with my beloved, she is precious to me.”
“But I betrayed you!” Layla spoke harshly, feeling that darkness flood her, though Reginald’s control held it back. “With your brother! I Bound him! And I fucked him as my Dragon… gods, how could I have done that?!”
“You did not betray me, Layla.” Reginald chastised gently. “You think you are angry with yourself on my account, but the real reason you feel anger right now is because you could do nothing to stop what just happened. Not only was Fury’s power working against you, but your own drakaina’s was also, taking your body and your choice away from you. Magic is a diabolical beast sometimes, especially in the bedroom. But I would not have considered you for the position of Courtesan if I did not think you had the strength to handle the immense confusion and madness of magical intercourse. Feel your wrath, Layla; feel it and find your way through. It is something every Courtier or Courtesan must face, and though you are not one, your magic works as if you were. And so you must face this, too. Just as I once did.”
“But Fury’s power, his darkness—!” Layla gasped, twisting in Reginald’s arms.
“Is coursing through your veins from the Bind right now and dragging you under.” Reginald commented sternly, but with compassion as he held her tight from escape. “It is augmenting your own self-hate, Layla. Like a bad marriage, you are dragging each other down into that vastly dark place. Breathe. Find your center. Learn how to come back to the light, despite everything that has occurred and how you feel about it. Because sometimes your Dragon has a mind of its own. And sometimes it is impossible to fight.”
“This has happened to you? Your beast… betraying you like this?” Layla spoke, her tears slowing as she waded through her emotions now – and also the ones that weren’t hers. Deep inside, she could feel Fury’s unrestrained darkness crashing through her and augmenting her self-loathing; Reginald the steady force that held that terrible darkness in check. Though Reginald had it too, and had nearly crashed to it before when Fury had told him Hunter was their father, he held strong now with the impeccable control that was his birthright. But even so, Layla felt a dark shudder pass through that control as Reginald held her. Though he managed it better, Reginald had his own self-loathing pushing his inner darkness. Layla felt how quickly all three of them could go down now if their Bind was pushed by the right force.
Simply because Fury had joined all of his vast darkness to theirs.
“Yes, my beast has betrayed me before, Layla, just like yours did tonight.” Reginald spoke quietly, as if feeling the instability introduced to the Bind from Fury’s wild power and self-hate. “My Siren has had unimaginable attractions to people I didn’t want, and once to someone who treated me badly. For many years I could not escape that relationship, craving it like a drug because of my inner darkness – a vast self-hatred I could not overcome at the time. I have learned to be the master of my deeps, but when I was younger and newer to my beast, it was a scalding lesson.”
“Someone abused you. Took you without your human consent, because your Siren wanted it.” Layla understood, the thought shocking her to stillness.
“Yes.” Reginald nodded, smoothing his fingers over her back. “For years upon years, he and I were together as he convinced me to wallow in my black deeps for his pleasure. It was a bad relationship.”
“Who?”
“Quindici DaPonti.” Nuzzling her cheek, Reginald heaved a sigh. “He taught me many things at the Florence Hotel while I was there as his Partner. Chief among them… he showed me how to overcome my addiction to my own self-hate, and wrest my Siren away from those who wanted to exploit my darkness – like him. I learned. But it was an unpleasant time. A time I would spare you from, if I can.”
Reginald went silent, and Layla could feel the vast darkness beginning to churn inside him also now through their Bind. As if his recollection of years of abuse at Quindici’s hands plus their new Bind to Fury made his black void rise tenfold, it was suddenly feeding Layla’s – swirling it higher inside her rather than calming her. With a will, she felt Reginald pull himself back to a better place, flooding a steady stream of oceanic light into her once more. But Layla felt in that moment what it would do to the Bind if Reginald ever went dark.
If his impeccable control was ever towed under.
“Fury asked me to kill him.” Layla spoke suddenly.
“What?” Reginald’s tone went ice-cold, his Siren-power rushing around Layla with a dark current in the hot pool.
“He asked me to kill him, that’s what prompted his Siren to go wild – it didn’t agree with his plans.” Layla spoke again, hating to tell Reginald but knowing she needed to. “Fury’s found a way to imbue his power into a pearl he created, and wanted me to Bind him then kill him, locking his Siren-power into the pearl so I could wear it and wield his spirit-drake. I told him I wouldn’t do it. But he thinks he’s the weak link. That if Hunter kills him, it will drive you dark. And that if you fall, the Bind falls. All of us… diving down into that long, cold blackness together.”
Reginald went very still, like a beautiful statue. It was a stillness like ruins in the deeps, and it shook Layla to her core as she felt him spiral down, flooding darkness through her veins. Pulling back with alarm, Layla lifted her hands to his face. There was nothing in his eyes as they swirled the palest ice-blue Layla had ever seen. It was a look past wrath, past rage, past any human emotion. A look so cruel and cold that it made Layla’s drakaina flare up in a sudden storm inside her. Surging up, Layla locked her lips to Reginald’s, pouring a golden fire into him. Slowly, she felt that tide of blackwater inside the Bind decrease. But even as he thawed and began to kiss her back, Layla knew it had been a near thing.
Fury’s darkness in the Bind was already dragging them under.
And Hunter hadn’t done a damn thing.
As Reginald pulled away, the knowledge of what was happening was in his eyes, too. As his eyes gradually seeped back to blue-grey, a terrible understanding took his haughty, beautiful face. As they watched each other, Layla felt the synergy of their Bind, so strong, so deep – and so easy to drag each other down into the black now. It made her swallow hard as they shared that vast understanding.
And then Reginald slid her gently off his lap, rising to standing in the pool and extending his hand. “I think it’s time we headed back to Deep Harbor.” Reginald spoke coldly. “Without Fury. We’ll just have to make do with Leni’s tech against Hunter, if Hunter is indeed in the citadel.”
“But it’s the middle of the night.” Layla protested, though some part of her was relieved as she took Reginald’s hand.
“Dawn will rise soon. And I do not need light to wash icebergs from our path.”
But the way he said it gave Layla chills, as if Reginald was talking about how strong he could be if he gave in to this inner darkness they were all feeling now. Taking his hand, Layla let him help her from the pool. Moving back to the bedroom, she went silently to her bags as Reginald went to his. In a few short minutes they were dressed, Reginald clad informally in jeans and warm winter boots plus a sea-grey cowlneck sweater.
As Layla finished dressing also, in jeans, a pair of back-up winter boots lined with plaid flannel, and a long-sleeved yoga top with a thick wool Tibetan shawl, she saw Reginald pull his long golden hair over one shoulder. Scowling at its extreme length, he bent to fetch something from his bag. Layla saw it was an elegant folding-knife, the driftwood handle encrusted with pearls. As he flicked it open and gripped those silken strands in his fist, Layla suddenly felt her drakaina rise up with a keening sound inside her. Moving to him fast, Layla pressed her hand atop his just as he put the knife to that long, silken bundle.
