“Tell me how I can help. I’ve never done this before.” She stepped back and gestured to the chair.
“It’s pretty straightforward,” Ash said, struggling to sound confident. “That pin slips into the port.”
She grimaced.
“I know, but it’s not as bad as it seems.” If only he could make himself believe that.
“Do you need me to help push your head onto the spike?”
The gruesome image startled a laugh out of him. “No, I can do it. It’s easy—just slip tabAinto slotB.”
Holy shit. He’d never considered how sexual the whole damn thing was until just now. When he couldn’t do anything about it.
“I’ve never done it with a head wound.” Ash changed the subject, before he needed to adjust his pants.
“Not even when you first got it?”
Instead of nodding, he twisted his body so he could see her. “I wasn’t allowed to port in until it was fully healed. I didn’t know what I was missing, so there was no rush.”
Now he knew what he was missing, so the anticipation was almost worse than the actual experience.
“I don’t think I can watch,” Taryn said and turned away.
He reached up with his right hand and felt for the spike. As his fingers slid over the thin metal spear, another thought occurred. “Hey, you got anything to sterilize this?”
Taryn turned around, her face pale.
“You mean...” She paused and her hands fluttered, a move he never expected from the usually calm and collected Jack. “You mean, that thing?”
She’d cut him open without blinking, but this bothered her?
“The thing that goes in my brain? Yeah. I don’t know where it’s been.”
“Uh, yeah.” She paled further and sprinted across the room. Sounds of retching echoed back to him from the bathroom.
She returned not long after, holding a spray bottle out to him.
“This is the best I have here. Let me know if you want me to get something from the main bar.”
“That’s fine. I trust you.”
She blinked several times, her eyes wide like an owl’s.
“Oh. Okay.”
When she didn’t say anything else, he added, “Would you spray it down for me?”
“Um, sure.”
Ash leaned forward, causing little ripples of pain to flow through him. This was such a bad idea.
Taryn moved closer. Her shoulder brushed his.
He gave into the urge to lean into her.
She turned her head and smiled. Just for a second. Then her expression turned serious and she focused on her task. Behind him, he heard the release of the spray and caught the flutter of a cloth as she wiped the spike down. “Done. What’s it feel like when you’re in there? Are you in there? What do you call it?”
He thought for a moment. How to explain the network to someone who’d never experienced it? “I think it’s different for everyone,” he finally said. “For me, it’s like you’re racing in the fastest car. Speed and strategy and competitiveness.”
