“I’m going to check up on it. Don’t think I won’t.”
“Just let me know what you want to see. You can look at my phone anytime.”
“I’ve heard that before.”
“What?” He looks at me like he’s confused.
“Like you didn’t know.”
“Didn’t know what?”
“That he cheated on me. I assume you’d have been his wingman in that. No other way he’s getting girls fresh out of college to date him.”
“He cheated on you?” His voice has taken on a frosty tone.
“You don’t have to pretend you didn’t know. I spent way too long doing that.”
“I didn’t know.” There’s an insistence that makes me want to believe him.
“You didn’t help him?”
“He never touched another woman around me. I would have had his balls for it.”
The way he says it, I almost believe it.
“With the way orgies follow you around, he never fell in one? No trips to Paris for the two of you?” I laugh because it finally amuses me to think of Drew running around after him, and the laughter doubles as I imagine him trying to hit on young college-age women. Alex looks at me like I’ve lost my mind. “Sorry, I just… oh god. I’m just imagining him trying to chase your leftovers around. Trying to pick up the women who are usually after you in his fucking loafers and dad bod. I feel sorry for the women, honestly.”
“You thought I’d help him cheat on you?” He almost sounds insulted, and I really don’t know why.
Before me, Drew had been as much about that lifestyle as Alex still is. I guess he really never quit considering the cheating. But they’d been each other’s wingmen in college, and I assumed Drew would be excited to pick back up where he left off. Having a professional football player as famous as Xavier as your best friend certainly improved your prospects.
“Didn’t you? You never seemed thrilled that we got married. I honestly figured you might have been half the reason he finally agreed to the divorce. That you might have lured him with the promise of nights out and trips on yachts with lots of women. Except then you said you didn’t know. Which is still strange. I assumed that you would have thrown him a post-divorce sex party.”
“No to fucking all of that.” He looks oddly grouchy, and I don’t know what I’ve said that’s offensive. “Is this why you’re radiating fuck-you energy?”
“I guess it’s a part of it.” I shift in my seat because now I feel a little silly.
“Then let’s clear this up right now. I didn’t know he cheated on you, and I sure as fuck wouldn’t have helped him. I didn’t know you had problems. Though I could have guessed with the way you two were acting at that last party. And like you already know—he didn’t tell me you were divorced. But you’re right. I wasn’t thrilled you got married because I didn’t think it would end well. I know Drew, probably better than anyone, and I didn’t think he was good enough for you.”
“Oh,” I say softly, feeling like I’ve been put in my place ten times over.
“I’m not the greatest guy in the world, Saint. But I’m not that much of a fucking asshole. Christ.”
“I’m sorry. I just thought with you two being close…” I trail off, staring down at the table and feeling about two inches tall.
He scrubs through his hair and stares out over the water again.
“Being close doesn’t mean we’re anything alike. And frankly, I don’t know how close we are anymore anyway. We were close once and then stuck together because of our contract. Now though… I don’t know. If he’d cheat on you when you did nothing but worship the ground he walked on, fuck knows what he’d do to me.”
“You do have a weirdly competitive friendship,” I acknowledge.
“Yeah. Something like that…” he trails off and he looks past me into the distance like he’s thinking about something. I don’t want to press this conversation any more than I already have. I feel bad that I might have inadvertently hurt his feelings, and I hate that he was trying to protect me last night and I’ve been so prickly. Guilt suddenly washes over me.
“Alex… I’m sorry. For everything. For being what got you into this mess and for thinking you would have done those things. Maybe we can try to start over. Try to be friends if we’re going to be stuck like this anyway?” I try to offer a white flag.
His eyes come back to mine. “I got myself into this mess. I could’ve handled shit better than I did. I just reacted too quickly when I saw your face… But yeah, we can try that.”
He gives me a small half smile that doesn’t feel entirely sincere, but it’s at least better than the grouchiness from before. He downs the rest of his drink and then pushes his chair back.
