But now I can hear a bunch of noise in the kitchen and the sound of the TV on, and I’m pretty sure that means she took my second offer to “just ignore it” to heart. Which is a fucking blow to my ego, and after almost a week of basically pretending our last “study” session didn’t happen probably means it’s time to assume my luck with her has run out.
I should take it quietly. Just stay in my room the rest of the night and then pretend right along with her that nothing has ever happened between us. But instead, I’m stripping off my shirt and walking out into the kitchen to find out what she’s doing, cause if she’s going to ignore me, I’m going to at least try to make it painful for her.
* * *
“Baking?”I ask when I get into the kitchen and see her buried in a sea of cooking utensils, containers and ingredients.
“Shit. You scared me.” She presses a hand to her chest but doesn’t turn around to look at me. “Yeah, I’m getting stuff ready for the party tomorrow.”
“You didn’t want to go out with Joss?” I pry, because I wonder why she stayed home if she wanted to avoid me.
“Nah. She’s in fine form, the kind that always lands us in trouble, and I’m not cut out for trouble tonight.” she says it warmly, and I can tell she’s smiling even though I can’t quite see it.
“Do you want help with stuff?” I ask, as I watch her dip down into the lower cabinets looking for something, giving me a view of her ass that I need to catalog for later.
“I’m okay. Aren’t you going out with your friends?”
“Nah. I’d rather stay in.”
“Oh, well feel free to change the channel and watch something else if you want.”
She’s turned back around now but still hasn’t looked up at me.
“Did you want to watchSigns?”
Her hands stop on the bowl, and she glances up at me, her eyes stuttering over my chest before being averted again to the task at hand.
“Sure, if you want to.” She shrugs.
I grab the remote off the counter and flip to where I’d seen it available earlier. One of my best memories of her was watching this movie. We’d all been curled up on the couch watching it, Nora had been falling asleep and when a scary part came on, Violet had buried her face in my shoulder. She’d stayed like that for several minutes, while I rubbed her back and her breathing slowed. I was high on being the one she turned to when she was scared for weeks after that.
“Does it still give you nightmares?” I ask absently.
“Oh yeah. I’m definitely blaming you if I get them tonight.”
“Just make sure you have a glass of water by your bed.”
It had been a running inside joke between the three of us after we saw the movie the first time. When she looks up at me and smiles, I know she still remembers.
“Good point.”
I start the movie, the familiar score creeping in over the air and then join her in the kitchen.
“Tell me what I can do,” I offer.
She looks around and finally hands me a cake box. “You can do that if you want.”
“Got it.”
We work around each other comfortably for the next 30 minutes in the kitchen, until I have to reach around her for something and the incidental touch causes her body to freeze up like I’ve shocked her. I’d almost forgotten about her ignoring the request, lost in the movie and cooking, but her negative reaction to me brushing past her is more than I can stomach.
I drop the towel I was reaching for, but I stay like I am, caging her in slightly, my left hand still on the counter bracketing her hip. I’m half afraid she’ll run when I ask her.
“How did I fuck up?” I ask quietly.
“What?” She acts confused, but it’s obvious she knows what I mean.
“You can’t stand me touching you. If it was too much the other night, or if my suggestion tonight was too much…”
