“I never said such a thing!” he denied, eyes bulging with shock.
“Amber, I was there,” her mother interjected. “He didn’t call you a whore. I agree he said some nasty things.” She glared at her husband for a moment. “But he didn’t call you a whore or insinuate anything of the sort.”
“Well, that’s how he made me feel. And here I am.” She spread her arms out to the side. “Twelve years later, and I still remember it like it happened yesterday.” Not only did she remember it like it happened yesterday, she had been reduced to feeling like that betrayed teenage girl all over again, complete with wet tears trailing down her cheeks, which she was sure were fire-engine red. All poise and maturity thrown out the window, she continued. “You gave no consideration to the fact that I had genuine feelings for Danny. All you saw was a scandal for your precious football team. That’s all you ever cared about. Football was more important to you than your own daughter. More important than your family.” She glanced at her mother because she knew she felt the same way.
“That’s not true!” her father protested.
“Don’t try to deny it. If you cared about my feelings, you wouldn’t have railroaded him. You were so angry that you wouldn’t listen to me. Danny didn’t seduce me. He was older, yes, but I was the one who pursued him. He didn’t want to get involved at first. We became friends and remained that way for a long time before anything happened. Because he was afraid of you.” She pretended to tremble, holding up her hands and shaking them. “Everyone is always so scared of how Coach is going to react.” The revelation that they really did have reason to worry hit her, and she threw her arms in the air. “And they’re right! You tried to ruin his career. You almost succeeded too. But it backfired. He made it in spite of you. Just like I did.”
“What are you talking about? He ruined his own career. He was using steroids, which is another reason why I didn’t want you involved with him. I didn’t want you caught up in that bullshit. He was a loser. You were better off without him.”
“That was my decision to make. Not yours.” Realizing their confrontation took a 180-degree turn, she shook her head. This wasn’t about Danny. She was over him. He left her without a backwards glance, and she had no room in her heart for someone who cared so little about her. This long-overdue argument was about what her father did and how she suffered because of it, and maybe it was time they cleared the air on the subject. But the man was clueless. She hesitated, then decided to hit him with everything she had.
With eyes like razor slits and lips pressed into a tight line, she stared him dead in the eyes. “I know the truth. I know you were the one feeding him steroids. How many others were there, Dad? It couldn’t have just been Danny. Or did you just target him because you wanted to get rid of him?”
Her mother gasped. “What are you saying, Amber? What makes you think your father would push steroids? He loathes the use of drugs in the sports industry. He would never do something like that.”
Amber glared harder at her father while she answered her mother. “Yes, he could. And he did. I have the proof.”
“You’re crazy,” he barked. “I did no such thing!”
“Don’t lie to me. Why do you think I was so mortified that I changed my last name so I wouldn’t be affiliated with you? I didn’t want you to bring me down too. I found the drugs in your desk drawer, Dad. Didn’t you wonder where they went when they disappeared? I was the one who took them, and I still have them.”
Her father slowly closed his eyes and his throat bobbed.
“That’s right, Mom.” Amber waved her arm in her father’s direction. “That’s the man you married. Coach is the one who was peddling steroids. But he framed Danny Lang, simply because I was dating him. He was my boyfriend!” she shouted at her father. “How could you do that to him? To me?”
“Vic.” Her mother turned a scathing glare in her husband’s direction. “Is this true? Did you frame that poor boy? Were you giving steroids to the team?”
Her father dismissed the accusations with a dramatic roll of his eyes. “Of course not, Cathy.”
“Stop lying!” Amber shouted. “I just told you that I took the steroids from your desk drawer. I was snooping to see what you did to Danny, and I found them.” She had enough of this. Her head ached. Her throat hurt. And her nerves were shot. She only cared about one thing. “I’m done arguing,” she said, with finality. “I don’t care what you say. I know what you did to Danny. I don’t even care anymore. But I swear.” She held up her right palm. “Hand to God. If you try to do anything to Robert, I’ll not only go to the Commission, I’ll go to the police.” With that, she turned and walked out the door. Probably for the last time.
The sobs came when she was about a block away sitting at a red light. She thought there weren’t any tears left to fall for that man or on the tender subject of Danny Lang and the steroid scandal that tore her family apart, but she’d obviously never been more wrong. How could her father do so much for so many people and be so horrible at the same time? She’d never forgive him for what he did, and she’d never get over the guilt.
The worst part of it all is that Danny blamed her. There was no closure. One day, Danny was her boyfriend. The next, he was gone. Banished from the NFL and from her life. He blocked her number and moved, so she had no way at all to reach him. When he re-surfaced as a kicker for the Dragons a couple of years later, she wanted to reach out to him. She wanted him to know that she had no part in what her father did to him. But she decided to let it go. He was rebuilding his life, and she was happy for him. It didn’t ease the guilt she felt for the role she played in his downfall and doubted anything would.
She hadn’t thought about Danny or what happened in years. Time had made her see things a little more clearly, and she acknowledged that getting involved with a 25-year-old professional football player while she was still 16 was a foolish thing to do. But she had been young and impulsive. And stupid.
A horn blared from behind her, and she realized that she was sitting at a green light crying. With a deep breath, she wiped the tears from her cheeks and drove home in a blur.
Two furballs greeted her with happy chirps as soon as she entered her apartment. She scooped them up in her arms and buried her face in their silky coats, relishing in the comfort they offered. Biscuit nuzzled into her neck, but Panther pushed his tiny paws against her cheek in an effort to get away. It made her laugh, and she needed that little bit of amusement more than anything right now.
The door handle jiggled, and she jumped. She had no idea why she thought it was going to be her father, because he didn’t have a key. The only one who did was . . . Robert. She gently let both cats down on the floor and fell into his arms. The tears started again, grateful that he showed up when she needed him most.
“What’s wrong?” He sounded panicked. “What happened?”
“I saw my father. I told him about us. It was awful.”
“Why didn’t you wait for me? I thought we’d go over tonight and tell him together.” He stroked her hair and kissed the top of her head. “I’m sorry. It’ll be OK, Amber. I promise. I’ll fix it. Tell me what happened.”
They sat at the kitchen island, and she told him every single horrific detail. When she finished speaking, he looked disgusted.
“I can’t believe this is the same man I looked up to all these years,” he said. “I loved him like a father. I used to wish my own father was more like him. I’m ashamed of myself for thinking that. What kind of a man is he? I don’t want to be on his team. I don’t want to play for the Bucks anymore.”
She was horrified at his statement. “You don’t mean that, Robert.”
“Yes. I do. I don’t want him as my coach. How can I? I have no respect for him. And I’m not going to worry every day if he’s going to do something to sabotage my career. I can’t.”
