They rolled off one another but stayed with their arms around each other and their bodies pressed together on top of the throw rug in the pool house.
They were quiet for a long time, until Jessi asked, “Are you happy, Tommy? Please say you’re happy.”
Of course, Tommy was happy. Being happy was never a question. These last few weeks, Angel and Jessi had been great at providing a distraction, but it was just a band-aid on the problem. Tommy lacked drive because his life was so full and because his career had plateaued. And the unanswered questions about what was next continued to gnaw at him once again. He didn’t know what he needed, but he knew he needed a change. Something to shake up his life. Something big.
Angel inhaled the delicious aromas of his ropa vieja simmering on the stovetop. The national dish was as rich in history as it was in flavors. He added a touch more salt and lowered the flame. It would be ready in thirty minutes. “I hope everyone’s hungry!” he called from the kitchen.
No response.
He expected someone to be within earshot since voices traveled in the mansion and echoed off the marble floors. “Does anyone hear me? Dinner will be ready soon!”
The click-clack of Jessi’s heels grew steadily louder until she entered the kitchen and took a seat on one of the high-back chairs at the center island. “Can I have a taste? It smells divine.”
“Of course.” He placed a spoonful in a small bowl and handed it to her with a fork.
“Mmm.” She closed her eyes and moaned. “This issooogood. Do you ever think about opening your own restaurant?”
“No. But I never really gave it serious thought,” he admitted. It had been a long, long time since he worked as a sous chef in his family’s restaurant, and sometimes he missed it. The idea of being the head chef in his own restaurant held appeal, but he didn’t have time for it. He did miss working alongside his father, but they still cooked together on family occasions. “Maybe when I’m too old to get up on stage and perform,” he joked, knowing that day would never come. He would be one of those old-time rockers who still gave it everything he had and toured until the day he died.
Sadly, the idea reminded him of what Tommy had said the other day about performing until they were too old to do it anymore. As if people would look at them and wish they’d given it up years ago. It was a worrisome statement, because it was far off and not something someone Tommy’s age should be thinking about.
“Where’s Tommy?” he asked Jessi.
“I don’t know.” Jessi looked out the back window. “He’s not by the pool.”
An uncomfortable tightening in Angel’s gut made him stop chopping cilantro and put down his knife. “You heard him last night. Right? And this morning?”
Jessi pressed her lips into a thin straight line and nodded. “He’s been sitting by himself and playing his guitar a lot lately. All Metallica.”
The recent questions and fears that Tommy had been expressing about his life, combined with the repetitive guitar playing, had Angel concerned that Tommy might be falling victim to depression. The issue was seriously on the rise, especially with those approaching middle age.Middle age?Could they possibly be considered middle age? He was only two years older than Tommy, and the idea that he fell into this category sounded absurd. They were still in their thirties. But 40 was approaching fast, and the number held significance. It was a milestone, but was it really any different than turning the number on any decade?
Jessi buzzed the intercom to the playroom. “Sofia, is Tommy with you and the kids?”
“No. I saw him go upstairs a little while ago.”
Angel exhaled. It wasn’t like Tommy to retreat to the bedroom, alone, in the middle of the day. If he wasn’t spending time with them or the kids, he was either in the studio or by the pool. “There’s something wrong. I’m worried.”
“Me too,” Jessi replied. “But it’ll pass.”
“I’m not so sure we should take this lightly. He could be spiraling into depression. I don’t want to ignore warning signs that should be addressed.” He realized he shouldn’t have made it sound so dire because Jessi looked panicked.
“You don’t really think he’s suffering from depression, do you?”
“I don’t know,” he answered, honestly. “Let’s go check on him.”
Apprehension tickled Angel’s back as he climbed the stairs, and he imagined the worst. Jessi wasn’t saying anything, and he knew that she was fabricating her own worrisome scenarios. When they reached the bedroom, Angel paused. He expected to find Tommy in bed with the covers up to his chin, but when he opened the door, he couldn’t have been more surprised.
Instead of hiding from the world, Tommy stood in front of the full-length mirror wearing his college football gear.
“Oh my God!” Jessi ran to Tommy and caressed his shoulders through the thick padding. “You look better than you did when I first met you. How is that possible?” She stepped back and eyed him from head to toe. “Oh my God,” she repeated, this time with a husky undertone to her voice.
Angel took in Tommy’s appearance. He’d never seen Tommy in football gear before, having met him long after Tommy graduated college, and the sight was truly something to behold. First of all, Tommy wasn’t wearing pants. His naked muscular legs stood out under his hefty upper body. The maroon jersey fit him snuggly, maybe a little too tightly, but it hugged him in all the right places. Tommy didn’t wear his helmet. Instead, it was perched on his hip, allowing his long hair to flow over the massive shoulder pads. White letters spelled out the Fordham name above a large number nine. It was Tommy’s number, and a bit of new information about Tommy’s past enlightened Angel. It may have been a trivial fact but learning something new about a man you’ve loved for over a decade was heartwarming and endearing.
As if Tommy Blade the rock star wasn’t gorgeous enough, Tommy Blade the athlete was breathtaking. It made Angel’s insides purr, and he imagined Tommy in full football gear running across the turf with the tenacity of the players he saw on the field last week in Texas. The sport was violent and often brutal, and the image of Tommy playing with the same fortitude drove a hot, sexy shudder through Angel’s core. He advanced toward Tommy. “I never thought I’d say this, but please put your pants on.”
“What?” Tommy asked, a quirky smile on his lips.
“I need to see the whole package, because if it’s anything like I’m picturing in my head, I seriously may lose my mind.”
