“One part of the show had a recording where you were telling Brookes about all the groupies you had slept with. Good thing this is a late night show folks!” he says to the audience.
More laughter.
“In the recording, you say the words ‘slut’ or ‘whore’ more than one hundred times.”
Boos.
“The artwork claims to address patriarchy and misogyny in the arts. Do you agree that you are misogynistic, slut shaming and repugnant, as Brookes claims?”
“To be a misogynist, one has to hate women,” I start by saying. “I do not hate women at all. Some of my favorite people are women!”
That doesn't land quite how I hoped but I soldier on.
“And slut shaming? That is about making a person feel guilty about their sexual desires.”
This is where it gets tricky.
“How many kinks do you think there are in the world?” I ask Danny, but also include the audience in the question.
“I would say the number is infinite. If you can think of it—someone is into it. Sex with pizza’s, dressing up as Donkey Kong. Spectrophiliacs get turned on by ghosts, and Axillism is the desire to have sex with someone's armpit.”
Everyone is laughing now, even Danny.
“You have a point here?” he says, through giggles.
“My point is, kinks are fine as long as no living creature is getting hurt by the kink. And what if someone had a kink which was… getting their partner to disparage other women? If they got turned on by hearing shit-talk about other people. That would only hurt someone if the kink information was shared…”
“So you are saying you have a kink about trash-talking other women?” Danny asks, a look of disbelief on his face.
“No, I am not. If you’d listened carefully to my previous statement, you would have heard that I do not have that kink.”
The disbelief turns to comprehension. “Brookes has that kink?”
Jackpot.
“Danny! I would never divulge that. I am a gentleman, and I DON’T SLUT SHAME!”
Yes! I get a fucking standing ovation.
Danny looks down at his notes, then back at me. I can see he is frustrated and doesn’t know where to stick the knife next. Then he does something unexpected.
He crumbles the notes and throws them behind him.
The audience is in stitches.
“Well folks, I was going to ask Hugo here some more questions about his time with Brookes, and the new book that she has coming out detailing that year. But you know what? I don’t think I want to ask about that after all. And I suggest that none of you bother buying that book. Instead spend your money on Mercury Rising’s new album.”
He turns to me. “Tell us more, we heard a rumor that Clara Duville might be recording with you. Please say that’s true!”
As the ending music for the show starts to play, Danny gets off the sofa and leans forward, putting out his hand.
“Never liked that pretentious bitch Brookes,” he says.
“Now, now,” I tell him.
“Isn’t the word ‘bitch’ a little misogynistic?”
LENNOX
