Don’t think about how his attitude softened in the last couple of days before I threw my supernatural energy at him and left him marked. Don’t remember the flutter his kindness could send through my pulse.
I set my jaw and think back to the most painful memories I can summon. Hail has always shunned me more than he’s outright attacked me, but there’s still plenty of discomfort and frustration in those recollections.
Hail must be able to sense at least some of the anguish I’m dredging up through our connection. As his expression tightens, the trickle of sensations coursing off him widens into a flood.
There’s so much of it, cloyingly bitter like cough syrup and as searingly sour as a rotten grapefruit.
My lungs squeeze; a shudder runs through my bones. Tears I try to blink away spring to my eyes.
He hates me so much. How could he have treated me like I really matter when I disgust him?
I brace myself against the deluge and delve deeper into my own sorrows. The noxious emotions Hail is pummeling me with amplify my own distress.
I’ve been such an idiot. Of course he never really liked being around me. Was he outright agonized all this time?—
All at once, the surge of emotion dwindles to a dribble. Hail’s voice breaks through my concentration, a little choked. “That’s enough.”
I stare at him and realize my cheeks are chilled—with dampness. A whole torrent of tears has streaked down my face without my even noticing it.
With a rough sound, the fae man propels himself toward me. He slides his thumbs across my cheeks to wipe away the last of the tears, and I really tingle then.
His jaw clenches alongside another swell of sensation, bitter and sweet churning together. “I know you didn’t mean to do it. It’s not reallyyouI’m angry with. Just… that it happened… what it means… You did a lot of good things too.”
I don’t know how to answer his sudden shift in attitude or the waft of concern mixed in with his conflicted feelings. It isn’t as if he can separate me from what happened or the consequences.
I’m better off focusing on the concrete details. “Did it work at all? Is the mark any fainter?”
Hail grimaces. “I don’t think so. It doesn’t feel any different.”
He lets go of me to tug out his shirt and peer down at his chest. The shake of his head confirms his comment.
Despair wells up inside me, so heavy it’s hard to breathe. That was the only new idea I had, and it got us nowhere.
“Hey.” Hail touches my face again, a gentle graze of his fingers. “It means something that you gave it a shot. I’ll try—I’ll try not to beat you up so much with the shit I’m feeling.”
I smile stiffy. “You can’t help what you feel. You should be able to feel it without worrying about me or anyone else.”
He sputters a laugh. “Lots of beings should have lots of things they don’t get.”
His hand lingers against my cheek. An unexpected warmth blooms beneath his cool fingers and winds down through my chest.
I want to ease closer. I want him to touch me more.
I want to drink in every spark of heat he can offer—like the flame that’s flickered inside him just now with a tang of lust.
Hail jerks himself back from me. He swipes his hand over his face. “It’ll be easiest if I stay as far away as I safely can until we get this figured out.”
He strides off without another word.
I stay in the empty classroom for a few minutes longer, giving Hail the chance to create that distance and sorting through my own muddled emotions.
I’m an expert on feelings. I’ve consumed heaps of them.
So why are my own like a plate of spaghetti dumped on my head?
I’m about to give up and head out to check my schedule for my afternoon classes when Gloss appears in the doorway.
With a toss of her sleek black hair, she sets her hands on her slim hips. Her sharp eyes pierce into me. “You still think you can steal him away from me when he doesn’t evenwantyou. I’ve supported him for months; he’s going to be bymyside. Why would you even deserve a shadowkind like him?”
