“August eighteenth, yes.That’s a Saturday, so we planned to take Friday and Monday off for the festivities.We won’t be having a real honeymoon, but there’s a small hotel in Cornwall that we absolutely love, and they said they could do a micro wedding for us, and that we would have the run of the hotel, because there are only eight rooms.We can stay on through Monday and we’re happy to spend the extra time with you guys, because we can honeymoon anytime.”
Mom asked questions about the small hotel that perched on a chalky cliff overlooking the sea.It was our favorite getaway place, and I knew my family would love it, as well.
The whole time we were discussing the hotel, and what family could make it to England—keeping in mind we had to limit participation to ten to twelve people—the sounds of fingers tapping on a keyboard were audible.I was about to ask Brother why he was not interested in the wedding when he interrupted Mom musing about whether they could tack on a week to have a vacation in England.
“I knew it!”Brother crowed.“And you think my memory is going, Chris!Well, this is proof it’s as sound as ever.”
“What is?”Mom asked.
“The International Medievalist Educators’ Society Annual Mystery Tour.”
“The what, now?”I asked.
“It’s a weeklong mystery tour and contest organized by a group of my colleagues,” Brother answered, sounding more like a hyper twelve-year-old at Comic Con than a middle-aged medieval-history professor.“I’ve always wanted to go on it, but we were never in England at the right time.Well, your wedding is smack-dab in the middle of the tour.I’ll be able to go on it after all!Don Setlo—you remember him, Chris; he left Stanford to go to that new university that started in Belgium—Don was telling me that last year’s tour had them going behind the scenes of theMousetrapplay in London, and they got to meet the cast, as well as tour Agatha Christie’s house later.”Brother’s words seemed to tumble over one another, his voice rising with excitement.
Mom was made of much more phlegmatic stuff.“It does seem like the timing is right for a visit, but, Brother, you won’t want to miss walking Emily down the aisle.”
“That’s all right,” I said quickly, not wanting to build expectations that I preferred remain out of sight.
“Emily doesn’t want me hanging around for days before the wedding,” Brother protested.“Do you, Emily?No, of course she doesn’t.Besides, it’s not as if you’ll never see me.The tour leaves several hours out of each day for personal time.I can pop over to where you are whenever I want.”
“Brother—” Mom started to say.
“That sounds good to me,” I interrupted, flipping on the electric kettle.“I don’t mind Brother having his tour around the wedding.It’s only for a week, and if you guys are here for the week or so after, then we’ll have loads of time together.”
“But the wedding—” Mom tried again to protest.“It’s your wedding, Emily.I wouldn’t want you making a rash choice you’ll regret just to please your father.”
“Eh,” I said, fishing out a bag of my favorite orange spice tea from Seattle.Brother sputtered in the background about knowing me better than Mom, and that he was certain I was down with the tour.“We’re not really doing any pre-events other than the stag and hen parties.I imagine Fang would survive if Brother didn’t go to the stag party.And if he can pop over to the hotel during downtime, then that’s fine with me.Neither Fang nor I particularly cares about the ceremony except for legal reasons, so it’s going to be very low-key—”
“Legal reasons?Deus rex!You’re not pregnant, are you?”Brother asked, his voice now flinty with suspicion.
I fought the urge to giggle.Brother informed Bess and me every year that he was not yet ready to become a grandfather, and if we could both keep our ovaries on lockdown, he’d tell us when the time was right for us to fire off kids.
“No.I told you Fang got snipped a few years ago, and just as soon as my doctor admits I’m old enough at thirty-two to decide whether or not I want kids, I’ll have my tubes tied to be doubly sure.We’re animal people, not kid people.”
“A wise choice,” Mom murmured.“Not that I regret having you or your sister, but if we’d settled down with cocker spaniels instead of thinking we could raise intellectual children who would better the world, life would have been a great deal easier.It looks like we could add twelve days to the trip before your classes start, Brother.”
He snorted something in Latin, then tapped more on the keyboard.
“So you two are a go, then,” I said fifteen minutes later, after Mom and I chatted about the plans, and Brother and I convinced her that I would not be secretly heartbroken to not have my parents at my side every minute of the day.
“Yes,” she said slowly, in the same dreamy voice she got when she was considering her Next Big Thing.“You know, one of the ladies in my book club mentioned that her cousin in Scotland has started a school for Neo-Picts, teaching ancient fiber arts and the like.They have woad dyeing.I’ve always been passionate about woad.”
“Odd, but true,” I said, wondering if I should take the last of the cookies that Fang and I favored, then decided that the love of my life deserved them after having to get up at four a.m.
“If you truly don’t mind us not being in attendance before your wedding ...”Mom let the sentence dribble to an end.
“I absolutely do not mind.I’ve got a project deadline two days before you’d arrive, and I’m going to be dead tired from dealing with the idiot team who refuses to listen to reason.You go indulge in the wild Pictish woad without a worry about us,” I answered with perfect honesty.
Brother signed up for his mystery tour with a lot of exclamations and declarations that “This year, the Brits are going to have to contend with a strong American contingent,” then asked, “What are you yammering about?”
“Let me know if you get any of those logic puzzles that have you filling in grids.I love doing those.Fang is good on the crosswords.And I was not yammering.I said that Aunt Kathie is next on my list to call.Er ...should I ask Grandma?”
“Hmm,” Mom said, obviously thinking about it.“Brother, what do you think?”
The keyboard clacked away wildly.“I think that I’m going to have to buy a couple of British crossword books in case Francis isn’t handy.The tour committee is sure to throw crosswords in as one of the daily puzzles to solve, and I—no!”
“No, what?”I asked, yawning.Fang had been called out in the middle of the night for a bovine-related emergency, and I’d ended up staying awake after he left, running through the endless list of things I needed to get done.
