What is important is the fact that I’m through with tears. Nothing was ever accomplished through crying. No, what’s needed here is a plan of action.
Organization, that’s the key! My old accounting business admin professor used to tell me that given the proper organization, any situation could be overcome.
I’m an intelligent, resourceful woman—I’ll simply gather the data available, organize it in an easily understandable fashion, and then use it to solve my problems. Oh, for my laptop! Or even a whiteboard! I could work up a killer PowerPoint demonstration if I just had the necessary equipment, and what I could do with a high-speed Internet connection, maybe a dedicated T3 line…”
The three ladies gaped a little bit at me. I decided they weren’t up to hearing about modern technology and moved on to a topic that would have a more productive outcome. “This may take a bit of time, unfortunately. Renata, I…
er… could I stay here? I can’t pay you in money,” I hurried on before she could demand that I become one of her girls, “but as I mentioned before, I can trade my financial skills for room and board. I’d be happy to not only create a business plan for you, but set up retirement plans for all your ladies.”
“Aye, ye’re welcome to stay, dearie,” Renata said, gathering up a basket. “I’d best be doin‘ me shoppin’. Ye lasses take care of our guest, now.”
The ladies murmured unenthusiastic agreements as Renata left the house.
“What be that retirement ye mentioned, Amy?” Mags asked suspiciously, turning the spit the meat was on. “This retirement—is it good?”
“Oh, absolutely. A good 401(k) plan is vital to your financial well-being and security in your old age. Don’t worry, I’ll explain it all once I have a fund set up. Now, to begin, perhaps I could start with a simple profit-and-loss prediction based on past—”
The front door of the house was thrown open with a shout of greeting. “Ahoy, the house! First Mate Pangloss is here! Come out, ye comely wenches.”
“Panny!” Sly Jez squealed, jumping up to open the door leading to the entry hall. A big, burly redheaded man swept into the room, not even staggering when Jez flung herself on him, cascading kisses all over his beard-roughened face as she wrapped her legs around his waist.
“Hoy, there, me beauty. ‘Tis missin’ ye I’ve been, as well,” the man named Pangloss answered in between kisses of his own.
Behind him another man lurked in the doorway, finally resorting to a shove to get Pangloss and Jez out of the way. “Gangway, ye scurvy bilge rat. Let yer captain through. Hoy, Suky. How be yer charmin‘ self today? And all ye lovely ladies… sink me, ye’ve a new recruit? Welcome, lass.” The man paused in front of me, jerking a maroon captain’s hat from his head as he swept low in an exaggerated bow. “And a lovely addition to the house ye are.”
“Oh, I’m not with them,” I said quickly, then realized how rude that sounded.
“Not that there’s anything wrong with being a… er… that is, I’m just staying here. I was, for lack of a better word, stranded here, and until I can find my way home again, Renata has kindly offered to let me stay here. But I’m not a…” I glanced over to the corner, where the man named Pangloss stood, still lip-locked with Jez.
“This be Amy, Bart,” Suky said, offering the man a tankard of grog. He was a tall, wiry man with shoulder-length golden brown hair, a hard jaw, and eyes that didn’t seem to miss much. “She’s a newcomer hereabouts. Amy, so ye’re knowing… Captain Bart is by way of bein‘ the governor of Turtle’s Back.”
“A governor? How fascinating. It’s a pleasure, Captain,” I said, offering my hand. Bart stared at it for a moment, then took it, turning it over and placing a kiss on the back.
“The pleasure, lass, is all mine. A newcomer to our fair parts, are ye? Well, then, ye’ll be lookin‘ for some help to be gettin’ what ye want in life.”
“Well,” I said, pulling my hand from his, pleasure mingling with a faint sense of discomfort at the look of admiration in his eyes, “actually, I originally wanted to become an officer, but my goals have shifted since I discovered I was stuck here.”
“Ye’re lookin‘ to be an officer, eh?” he asked, his gaze turned speculative. “What sort of experience do ye have?”
“Oh. Well, I have… er… I have a ship.”
“And she beat Black Corbin at swords,” Red Beth said, spreading the skirt of her petticoat and batting her lashes at the captain.
“Did ye, now?” Bart said, his look changing to one more calculating.
“It’s nothing, really,” I said modestly. “But I was alternate on my college fencing team for three years in a row.”
“Eh… nice. Well, there may be somethin‘ I can do to help ye, lass,” he said.
“I’m always lookin’ for good officers to help defend this lovely isle.”
“Oh, thank you, but officer isn’t really my primary goal now—”
“ ‘Tis the way off this island,” Bart said smoothly, the blondish beard stubble on his cheeks catching the afternoon sunlight as it slanted in through the window.
Hope rose within me at his words. Maybe that was the way to bring up the virtual reality interface? Maybe I had to achieve the next level in order to quit the game? “Oh, well, then, consider me an officer!”
Bart laughed. Red Beth and Mags and Suky laughed. Sly Jez and Pangloss sucked each other’s tongues. “ ‘Tis not quite so easy as all that,” Bart said. “But if ye meet our qualifications to join the crew, ye can go on the account.”
