“I’m scared,” I murmur into the blackness once the last note of the song disappears. My voice is small and sounds too brokenfor my liking. I can feel myself reverting to that girl who lived here before. The abused girl who was just biding her time, hoping that something better would arrive soon. I don’t want to be her again and refuse to be a victim once more, even if it’s just in my head.
“I know, Dove, but you just have to be brave for a little while longer. My dad will help to get us out of this.” Aeron sounds so sure, so confident of his father coming to our rescue. It gives me a small ray of hope and also makes my heart ache something fierce. I’ve never had that kind of support, the unshakable knowledge that someone is coming to my rescue. Not until the guys anyway.
“Are you mad?” I don’t want to know the answer, yet at the same time, I’m desperate for it, my heart ricocheting in my chest at the thought that I may not have lost them. Or perhaps I have. I just don’t know. Aeron sighs and even the sound of his frustration has me leaning towards their side of the room.
“I’m fucking furious, Dove.” My breath catches, my heart sinking to my stomach at his truth. My arms flex around me, my grip tightening to the point of pain but it’s nothing compared to the way my heart aches.
“Aeron!” Jude admonishes, and I can hear movement across the walkway.
“No, Baby Devil. He has a right to be cross. I led you into a trap.” My throat is thick with tears, tears that I can’t hold back as they flow down my cheeks. I’m so fucking weepy today. There’s just silence for a few moments as they take in my words.
“It’s not so much that, Dove. Although I am beyond pissed about you betraying us,” Aeron tells me. He sounds so tired, and I can just imagine him scrubbing a hand down his face like he does when he’s irritated and only we’re around.
“Then, what?”
“You didn’t trust us to help you. To get you out of this shithole, and that makes me so fucking angry, Dove. That you thought we wouldn’t do anything, everything, within our powers to protect you. To help you.”
I digest his words, hearing the truth in them as my tears dry on my cheeks. He sees my betrayal as me doubting their ability to keep me safe, seeing them as too weak, and that’s what really hurts. I didn’t trust them enough.
“I–I find it hard to trust, after everything,” I say eventually, wringing my hands together. It’s so fucking dark in here; there are no windows and I can’t even see them, no matter how close I bring them to my face. Aeron sighs again.
“I know, Dove, and it’s why I can’t stay mad at you. You’ve been through so much shit it’s a wonder you’ve allowed us to get this close. I just wish you’d come to us first. Then at least maybe you wouldn’t be stuck over there.”
“I’m so sorry, Devil Man.”
What else can I say? I fucked up and am only just realizing all the flaws in my plan. One of which is the potential to lose the love of the men who are my everything.
“I know you are, Dove. For what it’s worth, I’m sorry too.”
“Sorry for what? You have nothing to apologize for,” I tell him, my brows furrowed as I try to work out what he means. I hate that my thoughts instantly go to something bad, like they don’t love me, or that he plans to kill me after all. I really am fucking broken. Fucking ruined.
“I’m sorry that I couldn’t convince you of my love enough that you’d trust me more. I’m sorry that you couldn’t trust me enough to take care of you for the rest of our lives.”
“Aeron—” My voice breaks, and I hate these bars even more as I want nothing other than to be held by him and the others, to lose myself in their comforting embrace. An idea comes to me, something that might make this a little more bearable. “Are youwhere you were before the light went out?” My voice is stronger than it was moments before, and my chest has less of a weight on it as excitement fills me.
“Yes, I’ve not moved, why?” he asks, his tone adorably confused at my abrupt change of subject. It brings a smile to my lips, and I grab hold of that smile as I’ve a feeling I won’t get many in here. Not with what my father has planned. I shuffle down so that I’m lying on the floor, my shoulder pressed up against the bars, and reach through with my hand, extending it out into the narrow walkway as far as I can. It tugs my wound, but I ignore the bite as I shuffle further out.
“Reach through the bars, Devil Man,” I tell him, excitement making my stomach tingle at the thought of being able to touch him, even just a small amount. I gasp as fingers brush my own, hearing a breath leave him too.
“Dove—” his voice sounds just as choked as mine was moments before, his hand grasping mine and tangling our fingers together. Fresh tears drip down the side of my face as his warm hand envelops mine, heat spreading all the way up my arm and into my heart.
“Will you hold my hand for a bit?” I ask, the question tentative and my tone unsure.
“Dove, I’ll hold your hand for the rest of our lives on this godforsaken earth and into the afterlife beyond. I’m never letting you go.”
“None of us are,” Knox adds, and a sob leaves my throat. He was so fucking mad earlier that I’d worried he’d never forgive me and never love me again.
“You are ours,Aziz-e delam,” Tarl tells me, his voice strong and unwavering in the blackness.
“I call shotgun!” Jude says, and we all laugh, the sound making the space just a little brighter. A little less cloying and hopeless.
“Rest now, Dove. We’ll keep watch and make sure you’re awake before anyone comes in,” Aeron says, and my heart swells at the love and care in his words. His hand squeezes mine gently and I squeeze right back, pillowing my head on my arm and closing my eyes as exhaustion sweeps me under.
Falling asleep to Jude’s melodic voice singing the lullaby from Dumbo, “Baby Mine,” the darkness of our situation feels so much less than it did moments before. I don’t know what will happen in the next seven days, but I know that I have my guys around me, helping me in whatever way they can. I am no longer alone.
CHAPTER FOUR
“LOVELY” BY BILLIE ELISH WITH KHALID
