She flings herself at me again, and I stumble a little as I catch her once more.
“I fucking love it! I’ve never had a room so beautiful before,” she says, abruptly letting go and spinning around to look at everything. She pauses at the wall full of birds. “Did you paint these?” she inquires, extending a hand. I catch it, stopping her from touching the still slightly wet paint.
“They’re still wet and yes, I did paint them. They’re all free, like you are, Nightingale.” I watch as she traces each one, her eyes filling with moisture.
“They’re perfect, Jude,” she whispers, her hand gripping mine tightly as she turns to look at the bed.
“It’s the biggest bed that I could find,” I tell her as she blinks at the monstrous size. “It’s an Alaskan King and should be enough to fit us all, if you want the rest of them in here with us,” I add, winking when the others curse me out.
“I want you all with me, always,” she states, walking over to the bed and stroking the bedding, taking me with her.
“And we will always be here,” I say, wrapping her up in my arms from behind, resting my chin on her shoulder. “I want to spend every night with you, Nightingale. For the rest of my life, and then beyond.”
“I love you, all of you, so fucking much,” she confesses, and I watch as my brother, Tarl, and Knox gaze at our love as if she’s the center of their lives.
Aeron isn’t as cold anymore, laughing and smiling more since she came into our lives than he has since they killed June. The rage in Knox is less, and he’s been able to accept himself and his desires since she’s been around; she calms him like no one else ever has, not even June. Tarl has softened too, the ghosts that haunted him from his childhood no longer present in his eyes, and he’s finally able to embrace his healer nature. And me. The darkness has receded until I can finally see the light, can finally take a breath, and the monsters that kept me chained for so long no longer have a grip on me.
She’s the light, the missing piece, and everything we never knew we needed. Looking around at our family, with the other part of my soul in my arms, I know that I’ll never be lost in the darkness again.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
“BETTER” BY KHALID
LARK
We spend that night in my new room, exhausted from our day spent at the stables, and for the first time since we were rescued, my sleep is dreamless. I wake up feeling refreshed, in my new bed, surrounded by the men who make up my entire world.
“Good morning, Dove,” Aeron greets, his voice thick with sleep.
“Good morning, Devil Man,” I reply, watching as his lips twitch at my continued use of that nickname. What can I say, it suits him.
Soft light filters in from the gauzy curtains that we pulled across the window, and I could kiss Jude again for giving me the light and not trapping me in the dark. I’ve spent too much of my life in dark rooms, and I don’t plan to be in one ever again.
“I take it you slept well?” Aeron asks, raising a hand and pushing some hair from my forehead.
“This bed is the comfiest I’ve ever slept in, though that’s not hard given the beds I have spent most of my life in,” I answer, the room feeling like it darkens slightly as memories try to crowd to the surface. His hand moves from my face to find mine, tangling our fingers together.
“Tell me,” he commands gently, his voice lowered so as not to wake Jude and Tarl who lie on the other side of me. I'm not sure where Knox is, but he mentioned something about getting back into his workout routine last night so maybe he’s doing that. “Tell me one dark thing every day, and I won’t pressure you into seeing a shrink.”
My mouth goes dry at his words, and I raise a shaky hand to push more hair from my face as I stare into his beautiful eyes, full of the depths of the ocean. If anyone can be trusted with my secrets, it’s him.
“O–okay,” I answer, my stomach knotting as I think about what I’m going to say. “After Mom died, Rufus took me out of school, claiming that I didn’t need to learn that shit anyway. They mostly kept me in my room, and he allowed me access to the internet—well, he didn’t take my laptop away—so I used to take part in free online courses to try to keep up with my education. There was always the possibility that one of the inner circle would interrupt me, and you can imagine a bed that’s seen that much action and not changed in years gets a bit…scummy after a while.” His hand is tight on my own, the surrounding room almost fading, and I’m back in my tiny three-by-four room with Hello Kitty posters on the walls, the small single bed made with clean sheets, but no longer a place of comfort. “I could wash the sheets, they expected it of me to do the laundry, but after a while, I couldn’t bear to sleep in that bed, so I often slept on the floor. You saw the other bed that I had for Friday nights and the…ceremony.” My skin feels too tight, and I know by the way my chest rapidly rises and falls that I’m breathing too quickly.
“Breathe with me, Dove,” Aeron orders, placing my hand on his chest and taking deep, lung-filling inhales. I automatically follow him, the spots that had dotted my vision fading with each inhale. “Good girl.”
I feel Jude snuggle into my back, pulling me close, and his warmth serves to further calm me down.
“If I could raise the dead, Nightingale,” he murmurs in my ear, letting me know he was awake for longer than I realized. “I would bring Rufus back so that we could torture him in the worst ways, make him beg for a mercy that we wouldn’t give him for years.”
A small sob falls from my lips, and Aeron shuffles closer so that I’m sandwiched between the two brothers, their bodies protecting me from any harm that may try to come for me. But they can’t protect from the pain I’ve already experienced, and I think Aeron is right, I need to purge it somehow, otherwise, it’ll eat away at me from the inside.
“Another tomorrow?” I finally question, my voice muffled as I bury my face into Aeron’s bare chest.
“Yes, until they are all out of you, however long it takes, my love,” he whispers back, tipping my face up and kissing the tears on my cheeks that I hadn’t even realized had fallen.
“What’s the plan for today?” I ask after a few moments where we just drink each other in.
“Well,” Aeron pauses, pulling away slightly so that he can look at me without my neck straining upwards on the pillow. “A decision needs to be made about the old Soldiers HQ. Rook has decided that he wants a fresh start, and doesn’t want the old clubhouse.” My heart gives a painful thud at the mention of the place that holds such terrible memories for me.
