Knox turns back around and carries on walking as if he hadn’t just set a fire inside my pussy. I watch as his face splits into a shit-eating grin, but he continues looking straight ahead.
“Don’t worry, Little Bird,” he drawls as we emerge from the alleyway onto the main street. It’s deserted, and I can see a black SUV waiting for us next to the curb. “I’ll let you watch.”
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
“WILD LOVE” BY JAMES BAY
LARK
The drive back to the warehouse is silent, and I snuggle up between Knox and Aeron, letting the past seven days wash over me. I’m exhausted, still fucking hurting from Dean’s attentions, and just trying to process everything that’s happened.
I’m finally free.
And I’m not sure how to deal with that.
“What’s going on in that beautiful head of yours, Dove?” Aeron asks softly, and I’m unsurprised that he’s noticed my turmoil. He’s so observant it’s fucking annoying. I heave a deep sigh, trying to formulate my swirling thoughts into some semblance of order.
“I’m finally rid of the Soldiers, of Rufus, and all I feel is a sense of numbness,” I breathe out into the dawn, the sun peeking over the horizon as Tarl drives us. “I guess I thought I’dfeel more relieved or something.” I shrug my shoulders, nibbling my lower lip as I look out the front window.
His hand reaches for mine, catching my attention and he interlaces our fingers together as Knox does the same with my other hand.
“That’s completely normal and understandable, Dove,” Aeron tells me, his thumb tracing patterns on my wrist that sends tingles all the way down my arm. “It’s been such a big part of your life, it’s no wonder you feel lost.”
My throat bobs at his words, at the truth in them, and at the realization that I do feel a little lost. Though, perhaps there’s a sense of loss too?
“I feel like I’ve lost something, which is fucking bullshit because they treated me worse than a sex slave,” I say, my voice as heated as my words, the sudden rage in my veins making me hot all over. “Why do I feel like that? What does that make me? Some kind of victim that needs people to treat her like shit?!” I’m yelling now, hot tears streaming down my cheeks as I let anger guide my words. “I’m so fucking mad at everyone! At Rufus for being an abusive cunt instead of a father. The Soldiers who are dead now but didn’t suffer half as much as they made me. At Rook for being too young to help me, and instead, was the sole reason I didn’t run years ago!” A sob rips from my chest, but now that I’ve started, I can’t seem to stop the tirade that is pouring from me. The next words cut as they leave my mouth, tasting like copper and ash. “At my mom for leaving me, for not taking us away from them herself, and for being weak. At myself for not fighting harder, for letting them rape me over and over again.” My voice is barely above a broken whisper by the end, and muscular arms wrap around me, pulling me into a lap that smells like clean cotton, sandalwood, and vanilla.
“It’s okay to feel all of those things,” Aeron soothes, stroking his hand down my hair as he pulls me in close enough thatmy ribs twinge, but I welcome the pain, letting it tell me that regardless of all the shit I’ve been through, I’m still here. “Aside from the last part. You are not to blame,” he tells me, his tone firm and almost harsh. “None of this is your fault, Dove, and there was nothing more you could have done. We saw how hard you fought that cunt, and he was just too strong.” His voice cracks, his arms squeezing me hard like the memory is too painful for him to talk about. “You. Are. Not. To. Blame.”
I sob against his chest, breathing him in as I let anguish drag me fully under. I want to believe him, and a part of me knows it isn’t my fault these awful things happened to me. For most of it, I was a child, and even if there were times I didn’t fight harder, I needed to be smart about it to help get Rook out.
I barely notice as the car pulls to a stop, and then the fresh crisp morning air hits my face as I’m lifted out of the car and carried into the warehouse, the familiar mix of the guy’s scents washing over me like a comforting balm. I’m taken up the stairs, and although I don’t lift my head, I know by smell alone that we’re in Aeron’s bedroom.
“Run the bath,” Aeron orders, placing me gently on the bed and kneeling in front of me. “Arms up, Dove.”
I do as he says, my eyes puffy even as I feel hollow inside, wrung out from everything that’s happened and all that I just admitted. First, Jude’s T-shirt is taken off and then the green, teddy lingerie. I watch as Aeron strips too, the musky scent of him hitting me as he picks me up again. I snuggle into it, wanting to scent him all over me like a cat rolling in catnip. You'd think it would be disgusting, but I love the manliness of his unwashed body, the raw quality of it.
The bathroom lights are dimmed, the window that the tub is nestled into showing us the surrounding city in panoramic technicolor, and it’s enough to make me pause in my pity party and gaze at it in wonder. I hiss when the hot water swirls aroundus, not having noticed as Aeron steps into the bubbles, because of course he has a hot tub in his bathroom. The water smells like him, sweet but with sharp notes, and I inch closer to him as he sinks down with me in his arms, my legs over his lap, making sure that we face the spectacular view.
I look up as the others step into the tub, all gloriously naked. Jude snuggles up to us, and Aeron doesn’t even bitch about it as Jude grabs my feet and puts them in his lap. He brings up a washcloth, covered in suds, and washes my feet, making me squirm and giggle when he insists on washing between each toe. He says nothing, a small smile playing on his luscious lips as he moves to my ankles, calves, and then thighs.
Another washcloth rubs my back while a third begins to carefully and delicately wash each of my fingers. My gaze meets Tarl’s mismatched one, his face breathtaking in the soft light of the dawn that is coming in through the window.
“T–thank you,” I say, meaning it for all of them as Aeron holds me and the others wash me.
“Always,Aziz-e delam,” Tarl responds, his voice quiet and eyes going back to my body as he cleans my arm with the cloth. Each muscle relaxes under his touch, and I feel so much calmer than I did moments before.
“We will always care for you, Dove,” Aeron whispers in my ear.
I groan when someone, Knox, tips my head back and pours water over my hair, then massages shampoo that smells like Aeron into it. He works at all the knots I have in my head and neck, leaving me a gooey mess as he rinses and then repeats with a second round of shampoo and finally conditioner. Getting a comb, he carefully runs it through every inch of my hair whilst the conditioner eases his way through all the tangles.
Tears sting my eyes at the care they are taking of me, Aeron’s grip holding me close as I’m pampered like I’ve never been before.
“A girl could get used to this,” I tell them, my voice thick around the lump in my throat and my eyes closed as Tarl rubs some kind of oil into the skin of my arm, massaging away all the tension before getting Aeron to spin me so he can wash and massage the other arm after Knox has rinsed my hair.
“That’s the point.” Aeron chuckles, his fingers dancing along my inner thigh. My breath hitches and my pulse begins to race as his touch goes higher.
Jude sweeps my hair to one side, my new position having put my back to him, and he nibbles, kisses, and sucks at my neck, sending sparks flying all across my body. Lips descend on my nipple, and I glance down to see Tarl’s head over my breasts, feeling his tongue swirling over the bud closest to him.
