That will only lead to more problems, and nearly all of them for Ella. Just let it go, Draikis. This is not the time nor the place.
Draikis felt the heat of prying eyes lingering on him despite his silence. Someone was eyeballing him, and hard, he could sense it. The funny thing was he didn’t even need to look to know who it was, but he turned his head anyway to meet the judgmental stare of Totaxxis. He flashed a little grin and nodded, the displeased priest shaking his head with either disgust, annoyance, or a mix of both.
It doesn’t matter. He can focus his ire on me all he wishes. What is important is that, while I find myself missing her presence, at least Ella is not here to be the target of these murmurings and elevated emotions. One would think that after so many years preparing ourselves for this life, most would be better able to live up to their vows. To tune out the distraction.
He looked around, noting the glances cast his way. The looks of disapproval from his brothers.
Better me than her,he mused, a protective drive surging in his chest making his Infala tingle with an unfamiliar buzz. A twinge the likes of which he hadn’t felt even the slightest hint of since, well, since before he joined the brotherhood. Before he made his vows. Before his Infala was blocked from ever finding its mate.
He had brought food to her quarters, as usual, but found her absent, and it had actually caused a flare of disappointment.
She is almost certainly at the archives, and there she will be safe.
It was a comforting piece of knowledge. One that allowed him to eat his meal in relative tranquility, though, to his surprise, he found the strange human woman on his mind even more than usual. And with those musings and lingering concerns for her well-being came another surge of unfamiliar sensations. A rumbling in his belly accompanied by a tense heat a bit lower. The visceral need to both be in her presence and to protect her, no matter what the cost.
He caught himself sliding deeper into his ruminations, his body reacting in spite of his best efforts. His cock began to swell and harden in his trousers, a beast roused at the mere thought of her, and not even in a sexual way. This was something different. Something more. A buzzing in his chest linked with the heat in his groin in a way that made him shift in his seat to adjust the pressure against his now-rigid member.
What is going on with me?
It was a question he already knew the answer to.
There’s nothing wrong with feeling desire. It’s perfectly normal. And it’s not technically illegal for priests to have sex. At least, not most of them. We do things a bit differently in the Norvalians, but still, even then physical urges are sometimes quenched. It is only Infala bonding that is not allowed.
The twinge in his chest itched and burned with an almost electrical sensation, the long-dormant pigment blocked by supposedly uncorruptible Norvalian runes stirring to life in loud defiance, and with it his erection pulsed with want, thoughts of Ella flashing into his mind, and in a most decidedly non-platonic manner.
Her interest was clear. A blind man could see that. But he was above that. Consciously removed from it. Or so he had thought. But now? Something was changing inside him, and it was almost too much to bear.
Had he been alone in his quarters he would have stroked himself to a glorious release, easing the tension at least a little. But here, with his brothers on all sides, he couldn’t even rise to leave without his rigid manhood tenting his pants drawing attention. And that was something he did not want to have to deal with. Not ever, but especially not now.
Draikis casually glanced around, noting the conversations of the others, all chatting quietly, unaware of his internal, and external, plight. The coast was as clear as it would get, so he reached up and scratched at his collarbone as if tending an itch, pulling the fabric of his tunic forward just enough to allow him to glance inside.
Adrenaline spiked through his veins at the sight of his Infala very much active, though barely noticeable without close attention. But it was clear to his critical eyes. The pigment was fighting the blocking runes, faintly glowing as it moved within his skin.
Thank the gods the material is thick, he mused, glad for small favors. The glow was not much, but any Infala reaction was unheard of among his kind. More than that, he had seen and could no longer deny that it was indeed changing. Coming to life. Straining to unite with its counterpart and form the most perfect of unions.
This should not be possible. It can’t be. But denial will not solve anything. It’s clear what is happening, though I do not know how. No, Idoknow how, but it should still be impossible.His erection pulsed as his mind digested the hard facts in front of him.Of course I want her. She is so clever, and she possesses a spark of energy I’ve rarely encountered. How can a man of my kind, what? Love her? Now that I say it to myself, I know that is the case, but this is not rational. It is something wrong with my Infala. It clouds my judgement. But my God, how divine it would feel to hold her in my arms. To slide deep—no, stop it, Draikis. You cannot. You must not go down that path. She is your friend. You are her protector. You took a vow. An oath. You are stronger than any urges.
Even as he tried to convince himself of that, he could feel his willpower slipping even further. His resolve weakening. The overpowering need for Ella overtaking his rational mind.
No. I can control my impulses. I can make this work. I must simply meditate on it and rein in my urges.
He took a deep breath, then another, focusing on willing his erection to subside. And, incredibly, it seemed to be working.
“Are you all right, Brother?” a nearby priest asked. “You look unwell.”
“Just a bout of gas pressure in my bowels, Brother,” Draikis lied. “I am attempting to calm my gut with deep breathing.”
“Would you like some forxnis powder? It can help.”
“Thank you, but I will be fine. I just need to sit a moment longer until I feel well enough to return to my chambers.”
“Very well. I hope you feel better.”
“Your concern is appreciated,” he said, his erection softening further, the interaction serving to distract him from his prior state of arousal.
A few minutes later he felt confident enough to rise from the table, clear his dishes, and return to his room. The walkwas uncomfortable, the sensation of the fabric of his trousers rubbing against his engorged member making him harder with every step. Fortunately, he managed to make it to his quarters without encountering anyone along the way. As erect as he was, it would have been hard to hide, even with the tuck-it-up-against-your-belly trick. As soon as he was inside, he shed his clothes, freeing himself from their constraints.
He had planned on a quick shower then meditation, but as he stepped into the automated water flow, the force field around him keeping all of it sequestered from the dry floor around him, the pulsating impact on his cock only served to arouse him even more.
