Cenric sank onto the bed and dropped his head into his hands, groaning. “Damn it, Morgi,” he growled, cursing the goddess under his breath. Why did her warnings have to be so vague? Why hadn’t Brynn listened to him? Why—
“Cenric?” At her voice, he jumped.
Rowan?Snapper trotted over to greet her, seeming confused.
“Rowan.” Why had she followed him here? Cenric rose off the bed, pacing away from her.
Rowan shut the door to the bedroom, closing them off from the rest of the house. She briefly acknowledged Snapper before turning back to Cenric. “I heard Lady Brynn had disappeared.”
Word traveled fast. Cenric grimaced, raking a hand through his hair. “She was abducted.”
“I see.” Rowan looked away, like she knew this wasn’t her place anymore. Why was she even here?
Cenric inhaled sharply. He hadn’t spoken properly to Rowan, not since she had left his house for the last time, and their relationship had breathed its final, shuddering gasps.
Rowan looked toward the empty hearth. “I have received an offer from one of Olfirth’s thanes. His name is Evred.”
“Olfirth?” Cenric wasn’t sure why she wanted to discuss this now.
“Yes.” Rowan pointedly did not look at him or the bed. “He’s well-respected in Olfirth’s household and has been given his own farm. I plan to accept.”
“I see.” Cenric paced, adjusting his collar, his belt, unable to keep himself still. He was already agitated, but having this woman here, this former lover who he still didn’t know how to handle, made it worse. He had been alone with her in this room many times, but he didn’t like it now. This room was Brynn’s place.
“Would you have married me if the baby lived?” Rowan blurted out the words in a tumble, as if they had been sticking to her throat and she had to force them out.
Cenric stopped. Rowan had a miscarriage in the early spring. She hadn’t been very far along, not showing yet. In a way, the pregnancy hadn’t felt real to him. There hadn’t even been a body to bury. But perhaps it had felt more real to her.
Cenric would have acknowledged the child, of course. Raised them in his household, certainly. Maybe there was a right answer to give Rowan. Maybe there was something compassionate, something considerate, but Cenric chose to answer honestly. “No.”
Rowan’s eyes closed and the tension in her face eased, almost like she was relieved.
Cenric shifted, realization setting in. “You thought I blamed you for the miscarriage?”
Rowan shrugged, still not meeting his eyes. “I wondered.”
Cenric exhaled a long breath. “We were a bad match.” He shook his head.
He was a Valdari in all but name and an alderman. Rowan was the daughter of a modest former thane who had never left the shire of Ombra. Cenric had been fresh from Ovrek’s war,eager to prove himself, and convinced a strong sword arm was all it took to be a leader. More than that, he had been lonely, and Rowan had been awed by the attention of her alderman.
She had smoothed many of his rougher edges and he had expanded her horizons, but it was not enough. In the end, neither of them had been able to give what the other needed.
Had she left him, or had he sent her away? Cenric wasn’t sure.
When she had told him she was going home for a few days, just to be with her family, a part of him had known it was over. Their nights together had become fewer and further between until one day Cenric found himself promising to pay her dowry whenever she found a husband—not him.
“We were a bad match,” Rowan softly agreed.
Cenric wasn’t sure what else to say. This was too much on top of everything else.
“What Lady Brynn did.” Rowan paused, then continued. “When Olfirth came with his thanes? I could never have done that.”
“What are you saying, Rowan?” Cenric tried not to snap at her, but he was on edge and his wife was still missing.
Rowan straightened, like she was a warrior bracing for the impact of an enemy shield wall. “You need her.”
Cenric hadn’t expected that, but Rowan wasn’t done.
“I was…unkind…when she first came to us.” Rowan clenched her hands in front of her. “I can’t be friends with her. Iwon’tbe friends with her, but she helped my father and sister anyway. She helped my family. She’s already helped people across this village. Protected people across this village.” She inhaled a long breath and met his gaze. “You need to get her back.”
