The corner of Lance’s mouth turned up slightly. “Maybe a little.”
“Don’t worry. You haven’t done anything to anger me. At least not that I know of.”
Lance’s expression was playful, but concern lingered behind it.
“I’m not sure I know how to grieve for him,” I admitted.
“I would suggest you do it my way, but I don’t think you’ll like it.” It didn’t take much to understand his meaning.
“I don’t think getting drunk is going to make me feel better.”
“That just means you haven’t had enough,” Lance replied, somewhat convincingly.
It made me laugh despite the fact that I wanted to break down.
He took another step towards me and placed his hands on my upper arms. “I think you need to allow yourself to be sad and to be angry. At him and at everyone. You need to allow yourself to sit in that pain so that it doesn’t consume you.”
I didn’t know if Lance was talking from experience. He’d suffered more loss than most people I knew.
Tears began to fill my eyes and, without meaning to, I started to spill all the thoughts that had been running through my mind the past couple of days.
“My brother is dead. I don’t know if I’ll ever see my family again. My kingdom is in turmoil and I just...” I sucked in a breath. “I feel so alone.”
Lance’s icy-blue eyes gazed into mine. “You’re right,” he breathed out, like he was trying to get a grip on himself. “Things are less than ideal for you right now and it feels like the whole world is going to hell. But you’re wrong about one thing.”
He leaned down a little. I’d never seen Lance look so serious before.
“You are not alone.”
Without thinking, I closed the distance between us. I had no idea why I did it. Maybe I wanted to distract myself. Maybe I wanted some form of comfort. Maybe I just needed him in ways I wasn’t ready to admit.
Lance didn’t hesitate. He grabbed my waist, and I immediately dropped the bow and arrows onto the ground with a thump. His lips moved reverently against mine but there was a hunger behind his kisses, as if he’d been holding himself back. I held on to him, my fingers digging into his shirt. I ached for some form of touch or comfort. I ached to be closer. To have more of him.
Lance started walking us backwards until my back pressed against the wall. My face had been red from the cold, but it now felt flushed for a completely different reason.
He raked his hand through my hair, tilting my head up to gain better access to my mouth.
I leaned into him. Part of my mind screamed at what the hell I was doing while the other loved the taste of him.
Lance smiled against my mouth. “I’d forgotten how much I liked doing that.” He took my lip between his teeth and shivers ran up and down every inch of my body. I wrapped my leg around him and Lance took hold of my thigh, pressing himself up against me.
His lips brushed over mine and I could almost have deluded myself into thinking that a sense of longing lingered there. Lance kissed me as if he could devour me right there and then in the hallway.
With my eyes closed, I could melt into him and forget about everything that was wrong and unfair in the world. I knew Ishouldn’t be doing this. But I knew I wasn’t strong enough to stop myself either.
I didn’t need to, because in the midst of our heated kiss, Lance was suddenly ripped away from me.
“You bastard!” Cai’s voice boomed through the hallway. Lance barely had time to register what was going on before Cai punched him square on his jaw. “She’s as good as my sister. You have no right to lay your hands on her!”
Lance’s head whipped back as Cai made a hit to his nose and then another to his stomach. The impact was enough to make him fall backwards onto the floor.
“Cai!” I cried out, afraid to jump between the two of them. I’d never seen Cai filled with so much rage.
He was on top of Lance in an instant, landing one blow after the other. Lance used his hands to try to defend himself a little, but he was making no attempt to fight Cai, and I doubted it was because he didn’t know how.
“You come into my house, uninvited, after everything you’ve done, and this is how you treat her?”
“It’s not him, Cai. It was my doing.” But he wouldn’t listen. He continued to punch Lance, who had blood dripping from his nose.
