I’d woken up this morning not planning to go on a ride. It was almost too cold to get out of bed. But much as I wanted to stay snuggled within the warmth of my sheets, my mind was running rampant with the events of the past few days. I couldn’t stop thinking about the way Cai looked at dinner last night. Not only did he look pale and exhausted, but he’d barely said a word during the meal. I’d known Cai for as long as I could remember but I’d never seen him like this. He’d looked so distraught, like he no longer possessed the will to live. To say I was worried would be an understatement.
Elara said that she was going to talk to him after dinner. I had no idea what the results of the conversation were, but I hoped she managed to get something out of him because we could not go on like this. If someone didn’t do something, Cai was going to lose his kingdom. And after he’d already lost everything else... I couldn’t bear the thought.
I nudged the mare into a slow trot.
Just the thought of all of it practically made me sick to my stomach. Especially knowing it was my very brother that had caused most, if not all, of it. I was thankful that, so far, nobody seemed to be blaming me for any of it. At least Elara looked happy to have me in her company, inviting me to dinner and to go out into town. It was a massive weight off my shoulders. I knew I wasn’t guilty of anything. Hell, I was just as betrayed as everyone else. But somehow, I couldn’t help feeling remorse.
I would never admit it to anyone, but I sometimes wondered if I should write to Thatcher. Not because I missed him or wanted to hear from him but because I didn’t have the opportunity to scream at him in person — to ask him how he had it in his heart to stab his friends and family in the back... and for what? He betrayed Cai, who was as good as his brother. He murdered Jack, who was the head of Cai’s guard, and perhaps worst of all, he killed Cai’s mother and grandmother, who were like family to me. It was hard and painful to imagine him doing it. I wished I could have begged him for some explanation that would prove he wasn’t as horrid as everyone believed that he was, just the annoying older brother that I adored. But after everything he’d done, even I was not that naive.
There was a sickening feeling in my gut. Or maybe I was just hungry. I would get breakfast once I was back at the palace. Many of the trees that were not evergreen had lost their leaves by now, allowing the grey sky to cast some lights in the forest. The ground had turned brown and quite muddy in some places.
I wondered if my horse could sense my distress. She felt tense under me. Father had always said that horses could tell what you were feeling. I never knew if it was true, but he was the one who’d taught me to ride as a child. I had never been particularly close to my parents, which was probably why I’dalways been so close to Thatcher. But now, I didn’t even know if I would ever see my mother again.
The mare and I disrupted the silence of the forest as I urged her into a canter. She obeyed and I tightened my grip on the reins, forcing myself to sit back in the saddle so that I could keep my balance.
I turned her so that we wouldn’t be heading too deep into the forest, forcing my mind away from Cai and my brother. Unfortunately, it moved to the only other thing that irked me impossibly. Lance’s smug face from last night appeared in my head. Had my behaviour not been of importance, all things concerned, I might have thrown the nearest piece of cutlery at his head. Everything he said was like a trigger to my brain. Even more so because I could tell he was doing it on purpose. The rich prince was bored in his huge palace and had found an unwilling victim to torment with what he must have falsely assumed was humour.
“Hmph,” I scoffed out loud. “He couldn’t be funny if he tried.” I told the mare, who had no choice but to listen. She was cantering quite fast now but I held on to her with my thighs. The trees became more spread out and I decided to push her a little faster.
“I don’t like cakes.” I repeated Lance’s words in a mocking tone, despite knowing how childish I sounded. “What an ass.” I shook my head. “You have never met such a pompous, self-absorbed man in your life. And then he wants to talk about his reputation? I mean, I honestly don’t know if I can trust someone who doesn’t like cakes.” I knew Lance’s remarks were often made for the purpose of annoying me. And I was letting him.
One moment I was still properly seated on Bessie and the next I was lying on the cold, wet ground, gasping for breath. She’d reared. Luckily, she hadn’t run away or I would have had to go after her, and out in the open, that could have been a verytiresome task. I sat up and placed a hand on my chest. I hated feeling like the air had been sucked out of my lungs. I tried to feel for any injuries. My arms and ribs weren’t in pain, which was a good sign. I looked at the mare standing a few feet away, wondering if something had frightened her.
“What was that for?” I asked, somewhat annoyed. She tended to be a relaxed mare, so this certainly wasn’t normal behaviour for her.
When I tried to stand up, a pain shot through my ankle, and I groaned. That wasn’t good.
I slowly tried to roll it, confirming that at least it wasn’t broken. Manoeuvring myself awkwardly, I managed to get into a standing position. I hobbled over to the mare and I looked for any sign that she might have hurt herself. It didn’t take long to spot the lone horseshoe lying on the ground. I picked up her feet one by one until I saw that she had, in fact, lost her left front iron shoe. My guess was that whoever had done it hadn’t done their job properly, and it must have been fiercely uncomfortable for her. No wonder she’d reared.
“Poor girl.” I rubbed her shoulder. “I’m sorry.” She looked fairly content now, nibbling a few stray blades of grass.
I looked at the palace in the distance. It was a long walk back, but I wouldn’t be able to mount her with my ankle. Nor did I think it was a good idea to ride her until I was certain her hoof wasn’t in any pain.
“Well, come on, then.” I pulled at her reins and we slowly started making our way back to the stables. The royal gardens eventually came into sight and so did a figure riding a horse. The man trotted into the treeline until he came close enough that I could recognise his face.
Prince Lance wore casual riding attire with a black cape draped across the dark horse.
“Lady Gwen?” He looked equally surprised to find me here. As a prince, of course, he had been taught to ride from a young age, but in all my morning outings, I had never come across him before.
Lance dismounted as I bowed my head in greeting. “Your Highness.”
“What are you doing here?”
The question should have been what washedoing there?
He stopped in front of me, still holding his horse by the reins, and gave Bessie’s nose a little rub.
“Oh, you know, just took old Bessie here out for a morning walk.”
Lance’s gaze travelled from my face towards my hair. I watched in surprise as he picked a leaf out of my braids, raising his eyebrow in confusion.
“Did you have a fall?”
I looked over his shoulder at the palace. The stables were so close and yet so far.
“Of course not.” I let out an involuntary snort as if he’d just suggested the most ridiculous thing, when, in truth, I was too embarrassed to admit that I’d fallen off a horse. I didn’t have any interest in continuing this conversation. I just needed to find a way to get past him.
I placed my hand on Bessie’s neck so that I could keep my balance, but I knew if I attempted to walk, he would see that I was injured.
