“Thank you for calling today, my lord.”
His body was relaxed, but she could tell from the slight narrowing of his eyes that the effort to keep up that appearance cost him. Why hadn’t she asked Charlotte for details about what she’d said to him last night?
“I was surprised to receive the invitation from the duchess.”
“What did she tell you?”
There was a brief hesitation before he replied, as though he was considering his response. “She asked me about my intentions. She also led me to believe you’d agree to allow me to court you.”
Ice settled over her along with a healthy measure of fear. Courtship? Was he actually here to court her? That was the last thing she wanted. She needed to correct his mistake immediately. “I’m not looking for another husband.”
“The duchess?—”
He stopped when the footman returned with their tea tray, and Lucy was happy for the short reprieve. This was a disaster. She’d been very clear with Charlotte that she wouldn’t marry again, so why would Holbrook think that’s what she wanted?
Heat suffused her cheeks, but she ignored her embarrassment and asked him how he took his tea before pouring. It was ridiculous that she was more embarrassed by the idea that Holbrook might think she was searching for another husband than her real reason for wanting to see him today.
She handed him his cup, taking care that their ungloved hands wouldn’t touch, before pouring her own. The footman had already left, but Holbrook waited for her to finish pouring her own tea before continuing.
“Your sister-in-law did say that.”
She closed her eyes with relief. When she opened them again, he was watching her carefully. “So Charlotte didn’t invite you here to court me. Thank heavens.”
“If you’re not looking for a husband, my lady, then why am I here?”
He was going to make her say it. Any other man would have already taken advantage of the opportunity provided by being alone with her and propositioned her. But it seemed she was intent on trying to tempt the one man who didn’t want to have an affair with her.
She stood and made her way to the door. It occurred to her that she could flee the room, but there was no escaping now. She’d set things in motion last night when she told Charlotte she wanted to have an affair with this man, and that hadn’t changed. If she didn’t do this now, she might never again muster the courage.
So instead of running away, she closed the door and turned to face him. He’d risen from his chair but hadn’t closed the distance between them.
“I thought that, perhaps, you might want to…” The words lodged in her throat, and she was unable to continue. Embarrassment swept through her, and she could feel her cheeks heat.
Slowly he stalked toward her, his gaze intent on her face. If she had an ounce of self-preservation, she would turn and escape. But she wanted this. She wanted him. And from the heat in his eyes, it was obvious he now knew why she’d invited him here.
“It seems we are at cross-purposes. I came here looking for a wife, but unless I’m mistaken, you’re looking for a lover.”
Her mouth was dry, and she had to swallow before she could continue. “Not just any lover. You.”
One corner of his mouth tilted up, and she felt a corresponding smile spread over her face. “Just to be clear, I don’t share.”
Heat exploded through her. “Neither do I. Never again.” Which was why she’d never remarry. Once wedding vows were spoken, her ability to leave would disappear.
“So the only thing you want from me is carnal pleasure?”
Yes, that was exactly what she wanted. But she found herself saying, “I’m not sure I’d use the word pleasure.”
He frowned. “You doubt my ability to bring you to completion?”
She could feel her cheeks heating. Never had she spoken aloud about lovemaking. She’d participated in the act with her husband, of course, but they’d never actually discussed the subject. Mansfield did what he wanted, and she lay there and allowed him his marital rights. Until she failed to give him a child, that is. After that, he took his pleasure elsewhere.
Yet Charlotte was very happy in her marriage. And from the brief comments she’d dropped into their conversations over the years—despite Lucy’s protestations that she disliked hearing about what Charlotte got up to with her brother—it was very clear that Charlotte enjoyed their lovemaking.
She had to look away before confessing her deepest secret. But if she was hoping for a physical liaison with Holbrook, it was only fair that he knew the truth. “I think there might be something wrong with me.”
Silence stretched between them, and she wanted to sink into the floor in mortification. She could just imagine the look on Holbrook’s face. He’d be alarmed, perhaps disgusted. Whatever the exact emotion, he’d realize he was wasting his time with her. No doubt he thought she’d driven her husband into the beds of other women.
She expected him to make an excuse and leave. Instead, gentle fingers touched her chin and turned her face to him.
