“So that they don’t feel as alone as you did?” I ask him, our faces close together. I can take in all the details of his face in a way I haven’t before.
“Exactly,” he says. He reaches across me to grab a pen and pockets it. Then he stands up.
“I’m just gonna finish up some paperwork.” Something inside me makes me reach out to him.
“Can you stay?” I ask him, my voice quiet. I look up at him. He smiles and sits back down. I think back to last night, about what Elijah and Cat said. Maybe I should take a leap of faith. Iknowhe has a crush on me, and to be honest, I think I’m beginning to feel the same way. I can’t let what happened to me in the past affect what I do in the present.
“I was going to ask you a question,” I say, looking away for a second to make sure no customers were gonna interrupt us.
“Ask me anything,” he says, his eyes focused on me. It makes me subconsciously fidget with my hands. When he looks at me like that, I just want to stay there forever.
“Do you think… like… could we go out… at some point? I say, stumbling through the sentence. He looks at me with a wide smile on his face.
“I would like that,” He tells me, his knees brushing against mine. The slightest touch sends shivers down my spine.
“Really? You do?” I say, sounding surprised.
“Yeah, I really like you, Noah. I’d like to get to know you more,” he says, my heart beats quickly against my chest.
“Like, a date, I mean,” I say, making sure he knows that’s what I mean. I don’t want there to be any misunderstanding. He laughs at me and I laugh back.
“What?”
“I’ve never seen you so… nervous. You’re always so confident,” he says, and I raise my eyebrows.
“You think I’m confident?” I ask, and he nods in reply. “I think it’s a fake it till you make it situation, I don’t feel very confident,” I tell him, looking away again. He gently places his hands on my shoulders and turns me back to face him.
“You’re not giving yourself enough credit, I mean, you did just ask me out. Does that not scream confidence?” He asks, his eyes looking into mine again, and I almost collapse to the ground. He needs to stop before I pass out. The warmth of his hands on my skin makes me want to cry. It’s like he’s healing my inner child just by being nice.
“So you want to go on a date with me then?” I ask again, just to make sure I’m not mishearing him.
“Yes, I would love to. Where were you thinking?” He asks, brushing his knees against mine again. We’re sitting so close to each other, like it’s only us in the bookshop right now.
“What about dinner and drinks on the beach? We could go to Piran’s Garden?” I ask, smiling about the fact that all my first dates in the past have been there. That’s because it’s so good!
“Sounds good, what about tomorrow night?” He asks, and I almost fall out of the chair. Tomorrow? So soon? Is this actually happening?
“Yeah, sounds good,” I say, trying to stay cool. He smiles before getting up again.
“I’m gonna go finish that paperwork, but I’m looking forward to tomorrow night.”
“Me too,” I reply, a huge smile on my face.
Maybe taking a leap of faith does pay off.
There’s a mountain of clothes on my bed, yet I can’t find anything to wear. I have way too many styles to choose from, and it’s making my brain leak from my ears. I want to look good for Teddy, because I mean, healwayslooks gorgeous. I have to try and match that somehow.
I throw more clothes out of my suitcase (I definitely didn’t bring enough) and sort through them all. I wouldn’t say I’m into fashion, I just like to look nice, especially for cute boys. Some guys look good no matter what they wear, I am not one of them.
What style do I go with? Bad boy - with ripped black jeans, red shirt and leather jacket? Or soft boy - with dungarees and a pink jumper? I think I could pull off the soft boy look, but the bad boy look will probably give me a ton of confidence.
This is hard.
I decide to forget all that and put on a red shirt and jeans. I look nice. But then I remember what I was wearing to the party. I don’t think Teddy would do anything to me. I thought that about Jonathan too though.
I hate this.
I take off the shirt and put on the pink jumper.
