It took her a moment to realize that he’d just offered her what his cousin Harry had, with possibly the same intentions since she’d been on his lap last night, kissing him. Yet, her heart told her that Darius would never be cruel, never hurt her or force her to do anything, not like Harry would have. Still, her heart sank even lower at realizing this. Even if he did treat her with the utmost respect, that would be all she could hope for. It wasn’t as though she and Darius could ever marry, she was too far beneath him in status. It would be a disastrous match, and it could do immeasurable damage to his life.
“Your cousin already offered that to me, how could you even suggest that?” She knew she failed to hide the pain in her tone because he reached for her hand, catching it when she tried to pull away.
“No, sweetheart, not like that. You’d stay as my ward, my responsibility for the remainder of my life. I’d see that you had a trust put in place so that you’d be safe from people like Harry, just as my uncle did.”
Even if she did agree to stay with Darius like that, it couldn’t be forever. She had a terrible thought. He could not marry someone like her, but he would have to marry someone or else Harry would take his title and his estate. It was a future no one except harry wanted to come to pass.
“And when you marry? You cannot put off the expectations of your position forever. I would no doubt be considered some pitiful creature the future Duchess of Tiverton would despise.” She pulled her hand free of his as a pit dropped out in her stomach.
The thought of being a charity case to Darius had become so upsetting that she got up from the table and rushed toward the back gardens, needing a moment to calm herself.
Marriage wasn’t important to her. Belonging to someone who loved her was what mattered, but unfortunately that would not be an easy thing to secure, especially when her heart tugged her in the direction of Darius. She did not have the luxury of being a woman of independent means who could afford the consequences of being an unmarried woman who took a lover. She sat on a stone bench against the tall back wall of the gardens and caught her breath. She fisted her hands in her skirts, wrinkling the lovely green gown she wore.
“Meredith?” Darius came down the path to join her, looking far too handsome in his cream trousers and his blue waistcoat. Why did he have to be so tempting? She noticed how the noonday sun played with the strands of his dark hair, making them look almost purple. She knotted her fingers in her skirts, feeling suddenly very young and silly in a way she hadn’t in years. And the way he looked at her…as though she was precious, as though he didn’t want to let her out of his sight, made that ache in her heart deepen to the purest part of her very soul.
She wanted to run to him, bury her face against his chest and be held by him. But he wasn’t hers to touch, wasn’t hers to hold or kiss. What they’d shared last night was a dream, a life she had only a moment to taste before she had to wake up.
“Meredith,” Darius sat down beside her on the bench, angling his body towards her, their knees brushing. He took one of her hands in his, his face solemn. Those blue eyes of his were troubled waters now, dark and churning.
“I never meant to imply that you would be cared for out of pity. Blast, I am making a mess of this.” He bent his head so that their faces were almost touching, and his dark lashes fanned down briefly before he lifted his gaze again to hers. “You are not and never will be a burden or an object of pity to me. You are like family, though I’ve only known you for a few days. I wish to take care of you. Please let me do that.”
It would be so easy to say yes, to let herself believe that she could belong here with him. That she could truly belong to him in the way that she wanted to from the moment she first met him. But that wasn’t what he was offering her. He was offering her nothing more than what Uncle Ben had given her, a safe place to be stay, a roof over her head, clothes and food. He wasn’t offering love, or that deeper sense of connection that came from the most secret parts of one’s heart. And the longer she stayed with him, the more she would want that connection…that love from him. Because it was simply impossible not to fall in love with a man like Darius.
“Darius, I cannot—” she began in a whisper, but the sound of a voice nearby choked her into silence.
“Ahh, there you are, sir. I am ready to make the final preparations.” A man spoke from the other side of the garden wall. It was clear from the sound of his voice, the man was closer to the Crell’s house and was walking towards the direction of the garden wall where Darius and Meredith were standing on just the other side.
“You’ve seen to what I’ve asked?” Another male voice asked. “Just as I’ve set it out for you?”
“Yes sir…your things are ready to be taken to the hired coach when you are ready to depart,” Dobbs replied.
“You’ve made sure to pack everything?” the second voice snapped.
“Yes…even those other items. It will be dealt with as you’ve requested.” Dobbs sounded offended at who she guessed was Mr. Crell, when he challenged the butler’s performance.
“Once I’ve settled there, I won’t be back for a good long while. Close the house by the end of the week and I shall make plans to sell it. Once you’ve completed that, you may join me.”
Darius held a finger up to his lips, indicating for them to remain silent. He crept carefully down the wall toward where the heart- shaped window had been left open in the stones. Darius positioned himself to peer through the window without being seen by the two men on the other side of the wall. Meredith moved to join him. She clutched his arm, curling her fingers around it as her heart jumped against her ribs.
“And the jewelry, sir?” Dobbs seemed to hesitate to say more.
“Bury them until it’s safe to sell them.”
The other man, Dobbs, mumbled some reply. The sound of boots on gravel grew distant as the men on the other side of the wall walked away.
Darius ducked away from the heart-shaped window in the wall, his lips curving down in a frown as he looked at her.
“That was Mr. Crell and his butler.”
“Did you see Mrs. Crell?” Meredith stood close beside him as he gently caught her by the waist, holding her still as he peered through the window again before ducking back.
“No, I see no sign of Mrs. Crell. She must be inside ready to leave with him.”
“I truly hope that she is well. Why would he tell his butler to bury jewelry in the garden and then sell it?” That sounded sinister to her.
“I don’t know,” Darius replied. “Mr. Chelsea might be able to learn more. He and Dobbs have talked on occasion on matters regarding the shared stables. I’m sure he can devise some way to run into the man again.”
“Darius, I can’t forget that scream I heard,” she confessed. “And now Mrs. Crell’s jewelry is being buried in the garden…” She reached up to grasp his shoulders.
