“Papa?” she queried, a little nervous seeing her father hesitate to do or say anything. It was a rare sight, which meant he had something important on his mind.
“The post arrived from London today. I think you should read theQuizzing Glass Gazette, the Lady Society column in particular.” He held out the paper to her, and she took it. She didn’t miss another look that passed between her parents before they returned inside.
Alex held the paper for a long moment, wondering what could have drawn both of her parents outside to deliver it. It had to be something terrible. She unfolded the paper and flipped page by page until she found the Lady Society column. Her heart stopped, and she began to read.
TheQuizzing Glass Gazette, the Lady Society column:
Lady Society has much to say today and has a tale of heroes and villains and maidens fair, and even maidens not so fair.
As all of London has been buzzing with the scandal around the ruination of Lady Alexandra Rockford, Lady Society sees fit to put rumors to rest and champion the ruined lady. So, you ask, what truth shall I shed on this matter?
Lady Alexandra was ruined. Yes. That is certain. But it is not her shame, nor by her own choice that such an event came about. No, the villains are the ones to blame. And who are these men? The gentlemen of White’s club who created a wager in a betting book. One identifiable man is George Langley. He initiated the wager out of a desire to please his sister, Mrs. Hilary Clifford, who married Mr. Marshall Clifford, a man who previously had an understanding with Lady Alexandra. So what, pray tell, does Lady Society see in all this? It seems Mrs. Clifford’s jealousy of a past woman in her husband’s life set her brother on an evil crusade to destroy Lady Alexandra.
Surprisingly, not one man in White’s chose to defend Lady Alexandra. Instead, Mr. Ambrose Worthing, a known rakehell, volunteered. He was acquainted with Lord Rockford and knew the depths that the men in the club would go to for a five-thousand-pound wager. He believed he could spare the innocent lady pain where these other villains would not. But as fate would have it, the rake fell for the country beauty. If only she could love him back, but no, the ton has shown its cruel side, and we have turned our backs on the innocent woman in all of this. If you wish to do as Lady Society suggests, you will give the cut direct to Gerald Langley, his sister, and anyone who defends them. It is my personal desire to see Lady Alexandra become the most sought-after guest at every social engagement of the season. We who have failed to defend her honor owe her nothing less.
Perhaps, if we are lucky, we might find a way to help mend Mr. Worthing’s broken heart, because as I have always said, reformed rakes make the best husbands, and I believe Lady Alexandra deserves the best.
Alex had to read the column two more times before she could admit she even believed what she had read wasn’t some elaborate wild dream. Finally, she folded the paper up and walked back into the house, hands trembling. She found her parents in the drawing room. Her mother was seated at one of the small reading tables in the corner, sorting through a massive stack of letters. When she noticed Alex, she smiled.
“Alex, dear, these are for you. They came with the morning copy of theGazette.”
“What —” She halted herself and stared at the stack of letters, remembering Lady Society’s urging to make Alex a guest at all social events. Surely these all weren’t for her…
“You’ve been invited to every major engagement in London for the rest of the season.” Her mother seemed utterly delighted, but none of that mattered to Alex, and her father seemed to notice.
“He hasn’t written, Alex,” her father said softly.
She glanced his way, knowing what he meant.Hebeing Ambrose. Her heart gave a weak thump in her chest.
“Hehasn’t written because he’s staying at Darby House. Perdita wrote to your mother two days ago, informing us of his arrival, just in case he attempted to pay a call to you while he’s in Lothbrook. I thought you’d be interested to know that…” Her father trailed off, hesitating.
Ambrose was staying at Perdita’s? Alex reeled at the thought of him being so close.
“You wouldn’t send him away or…” she asked her father carefully. He glanced down at the book he’d been reading, his cheeks flushed a ruddy color.
“Papa,” she said in a tone that she knew he would recognize as a warning.
“Alex, my dear,” he said with a sigh. “I was hoping, well, that things might work out. I read the article by Lady Society, and it makes sense. He was a good lad, and he’s a fine young man. I was furious about his pretense for coming here, but…if he came, I would not send the lad away. Not if there was some chance that…” He shot a look at her mother, silently pleading with her to help him.
“Alex, what your father is not saying, but someone should, is that sometimes catching a man is not done by conventional means. Take your father, for instance—he might never have married me if I hadn’t lured him into the garden the night of our third ball together. He—”
Alex covered her mouth to stop a laugh when her father stumbled to his feet and interrupted his wife.
“Point is, I’m ready to forgive the lad, but the question is, are you?”
Was she?
Alex still held theQuizzing Glass Gazettein her hands, and Lady Society’s words were tumbling over and over inside her head.
“I don’t…I don’t know.” It was the honest truth. She knew her heart wanted to forgive him, and her body still belonged to him in ways she didn’t understand, but her mind wanted answers and time to think before she agreed risk her heart again. Instead, he was there in Lothbrook. So close. She could happen upon him on her daily stroll through the meadows. She could meet him while shopping with her mother in the village. She couldn’t go anywhere without the possibility that he could also be there, and she wasn’t sure if she could live her life that way. What would she say to him? What did she even want to say? They had parted ways when her ruination had been imminent, and she’d vowed never to marry him. There was a huge part of her that was still furious with him for what he’d done. But after reading Lady Society’s article, she realized that the situation had been as dire as Darlington and Ambrose had tried to tell her it was. Men in the clubs wouldn’t have stopped coming after her, even if she had been married. Married ladies could still suffer public ruination, after all.
He had said he’d wished to marry her, but had that been an offer derived from pity for her situation or guilt at having caused it? She didn’t want a man to marry her for either of those reasons. She wanted a man to marry her because he couldn’t live one more minute of his life without her. Was it so wrong to want a man who loved her desperately? If she assumed Ambrose did in fact love her and had wanted to marry her for that reason, she had stoutly refused him. A sensible man would have honored her wishes at the time, and he might have hardened his heart to her. The thought made her stomach churn, and she pressed a palm to her abdomen.
What if he had moved on? Surely he had his pick of women and wouldn’t wait around for her to decide if she could trust her broken heart in his hands for a second time. He was a rake, after all, and they had plenty of women they could turn to, as charming men always did. But her heart insisted that he wouldn’t, that what had transpired between them had been different for him than with any other woman.
Is it my vanity that believes such nonsense? Or is my heart so foolish that it has convinced me I was special to him, just as he was to me?
“No one is requiring you to marry him,” her father said. “But I thought you’d want to know he was nearby. A man who isn’t madly in love would not be waiting at Darby House for you. Trust me.” Her father chuckled. “Mrs. Darby is not what single young men frequently choose for company, not when she has been husband-hunting for her own daughter. Why don’t you take a walk, think on it? You know how I feel about fresh air for one’s constitution.” He puffed up proudly, which made her mother giggle.
